But for a Slime

It seemed to pulse a few times, then suddenly shrank, ripping itself away from the three stakes nailing it to the ground and shrinking to bring the gem back to the center of its mass while forming up around his spoon spear. Suddenly, Joe realized that he was holding a triple gem slime above his head with only a spear between him and it. He ripped his good spear off his back and slammed the slime towards the ground even as he brought the good spear up, around, and back down towards the slime. The spoon spear slammed the slime into the ground at the same time as his good spear pierced through the slime and into the ground, but the strike was much weaker than he had hoped. Why is it so tough now?! The spear is barely staked to the ground. It’s not going to hold!

Joe jerked down firmly on his good spear one last time, hoping to bury it into the dirt one last time, and then brought his hand back to the spoon spear, desperately bringing it back under the triple gem. He got it positioned, then heaved with all his might to pull out the gem. Even as it moved rapidly to the slimes surface, the slime reacted again, quickly erupting in size and attempting to bring the gem back to its center. This time, it erred. Joe pulled his spoon spear up with the gem, rapidly increasing speed as the increase of size cumulated with his outward sweep and the core tumbled weakly from the ooze. It slipped over the top of his head, barely a couple of feet above him, a weak and anemic throw that was unusual for him, even with double gem slimes. Man! That ooze is much denser, thicker! So much harder to get it clear!

He turned rapidly, pulling out his good spear as well, in case he would need it to stake it if there were any slime left, and Joe realized his fears were realized. The core was ejected, but it still had enough slime to take to form of an extremely small slime. Even as he watched, it hit the ground and suddenly quivered. Instinct more than anything saved Joes life, and he threw himself to the side as he recognized the contracting and expanding quiver as the typical slime jump, only sped up to the extreme. He didn’t even see it pass by, and wasn’t even certain that it had leapt at him until he felt the wind brush past his ear. This… is not looking good. I had a chance before because I had it nailed down… but now!

Joe turned quickly and watched with some shock as the slime flew through the air almost double the distance it normally did. There is NO way I’m getting to it before it jumps again! Think! Joe ran forward even though knew it was futile. But continuous dodging only killed you. You only have to be wrong once, and then you’re dead! Joe remembered his father’s statement, pounded into him throughout all his training. He sprinted towards the slime and considered his options. He thought about seeing if he could get the slime to hit a tree, and angled himself to have a tree between them, but the slime refused to jump until he had a clear shot on Joe. Is it getting smarter! This… crap!

Joe had to leap out of the way again as it screamed past his head too fast for him to see, only his reaction to the slimes contraction and expansion in preparation for a jump causing his body to move instinctively. He turned and ran towards it again, hoping to slowly get close enough to stake it, but finding almost no option to do so. It landed and once again looked to leap at him, and again, the ‘quiver’ of contraction and expansion gave him the hint he needed to leap to the side, the slime once again slicing past his head just by his ear. He’s aiming for my head! Hmm…

Joe turned again, sprinting towards the slime once more, but brought up his good spear to throw, timing it for the quiver he was used to seeing. It was a completely blind throw, the spear flying on the reverse trajectory he thought the slime would be taking to reach him, even has he tucked his head in and down to allow the slime to fly over his head this time. He wasn’t sure, but the strange slime scream echoed again, and he thought he had at least clipped it. OK. So decent plan… but skewering it probably is a bad idea. I’d have to get a direct hit on the gem!

Joe flipped directions once more and this time readied his spoon spear. Let’s try baseball! Joe kept his eyes on the gem even as it tore through the air. When it hit the ground, he saw the expected quiver of contraction and expansion. His hands swung the spoon spear from over his shoulder right to in front of his face as hard as he could, an almost shortened overhand axe chop. The slime was moving too fast to position himself correctly to get a full swing, but if he just swiped directly in front of his head, the slime would literally run into it itself. Of course, since it was jumping that fast, it would likely be able to take a hit from going that fast. It had to hit the ground or its target going that fast, so it obviously wouldn’t be harmed greatly. But he hoped his swing would be enough to splatter off more slime.

Even has he brought the spoon spear down in front of him almost like a grotesque strange overhand bunt, the spear clanged from a hard hit and Joe exerted even more force to swing the spear hard into the ground, smashing the slime into the forest floor with his entire strength. Moving quickly, he slammed his boot down on the slime even as he removed his spoon spear, then breathed easy as he saw he had caught the gem under his foot. The ooze couldn’t slither away with any speed, its body desperately struggling to pull its gem out from under his foot.

Joe brought his spoon spear down to pull the gem out, but then realized his quandary. If I pick up my foot, it’ll just glom onto my spear. How… The idea came to him quickly, and he began dipping the spoon spear into the stretching ooze, then flicking his spear head out, pulling off great gobs of ooze. His spear returned, repeatedly flicking of gobs of ooze over and over again until he had removed enough of the ooze that it could no longer surround the triple core. When the core was exposed, he removed his foot and pulled out a whisk stick and carefully placed his finger to the gem. Ooze slipped around the edge of the gem at blinding speed, charging for his finger and Joe barely removed it even as he whisked that chunk away. He pressed a finger to it again, then pulled it away nervously, but no new ooze came. He did it a couple of more times before he finally felt his whole body relax as he crumbled to the floor, seated in front of his new triple gem piece. That really wasn’t worth it! How can they get so strong so fast with just one more! What would a four or five gem one do! Joe shuddered in fear even as the idea crept into mind, and he swore to never attempt a triple gem slime again.

Having succeeded, he decided to check his log. I might as well see if it was worth it! But when the log came up, Joe saw no entry for killing the slime. The last slime he had killed was a greater slime and its experience value was the same as all the other greater slimes he had killed today. His eyebrows crunched as he pondered the mystery. Is it not another step up? Maybe it needs four gems to go up? Is it doubling? One, two, four, eight? Not One, two, three, four? But its power was so much more overwhelming! I would never had a chance if it wasn’t already staked, or I had shrunk it already by so much!

Joe considered the mystery for a bit before picking up the triple gem and turning it in his hand before rapidly dropping it to the ground. Is it playing dead! Joe shivered at the thought. How did it get so cunning so fast? Just another gem is enough to do that? Joe leaned towards the gem and began to study its every swirl and whorl of the clear crystalline lacework binding the three gems together as carefully as possible. It was as he was going by one of the swirls that he surprisingly found something. He touched the gem, but what he thought was ooze did not move at all, not even a quiver. He picked up carefully and held it up to the sunlight, looking through that particular whorl and noticed a green tinge. His face changed rapidly and he quickly smashed his whisk stick into the thin layer of slime ooze that was stretched thinly between one of the decorative spaces. Even as he did so, he immediately felt the status update and finally relaxed once again.

Seriously! They get smarter, too? That was just nuts. Its abilities increased by a significant amount more than just the extra single point of experience I got. I only got an extra point but it seemed to get a significant boost in speed, cunning, health, and strength! How is that fair in any way! He cleaned the gem and dropped it into his pouch even as he checked his log. Huh… a master slime. And yup, triple experience… but so not worth it.

Joe leaned against a tree trunk and then glanced towards the sun. It’s only late midafternoon… but I really don’t feel like hunting anymore! Besides, I really want to clean off my equipment and boots. Don’t want the slime ooze to destroy it. Joe used his canteen to clean of his equipment quite thoroughly, although he wasn’t satisfied. This slime had surprised him with what it could do!

He retrieved his good spear, and then returned to the village. He walked with determination, but was actually quite exhausted emotionally by the fight. It was the closest he had come to dying. Alright… that was kind of stupid! No more MC stupid. I’m not in a novel! Gotta be careful and stay alive!

On his walk back, he took out the triple gem and played with it in his hands, trying to study it carefully. He flipped over in his hands several times, but could find nothing which may point to its value. It was certainly beautiful, but they were as easy to get as an apple from a tree. He picked up over a hundred a day, with relative ease. They must have some kind of special purpose. Something that lets them have value. Maybe a magic item? Add it to a sword and you get a… slime sword? As Joe considered a slime sword, he couldn’t find any way that such a weapon would be useful. His mind soon drifted from trying to fathom the gem’s worth to enjoying the irony of a slime sword.

Joe came out of the forest and was crossing the farmer fields when he heard a shout come up in the village. He looked up with worry and begin to jog quickly towards the village but then realized that it wasn’t much. Just some people were gathering and Garnedell had noticed him, gesturing him to follow. Joe slowed to a walk and came into the village proper, a bit of a sigh slipping heavily from his lips. He was exhausted.

“Hey, kid. What you need?”

“’allo, Zho. Tu ngaragan shukargan.”

“Oh.. hey… ah. Uh... Hello... Joe... You … found… uuhhh.... hmm… donno the last word. What’s up?”

Garnedell waved for him to follow, Joe was led to what passed as the village square. There they found a crowd of people gathered around the blacksmith and several other village elder-ish people. The elders were faced off against another man who sauntered around the open middle of the crowd with some arrogance. Even as he moved around, he shouted at the crowd, seeming to have a bit of a mocking tone. He pulled out a slime gem even as he talked, and suddenly it seemed to flash brightly in his hands, then suddenly melted into his hands. What? Weird… what is going on… and… how?

It seemed Joe’s thief had been found.

* * *

Lord Grugtrim, Baron of Soonesia, Rider of Golden Gryphon, Sword Magister of His Majesty Margun the Wise, Paragon Duelist, and Key of the Queen was quite infuriated. He’d sent his knight Toogarn to make his plea for the hand of the Viscountess of Kurnar. The poor woman had just recently found herself widowed when her husband had found his unexpected end while on the hunt. The Viscount had got himself separated and fallen from his horse, dead before he’d even hit the ground, although no one else knew such details. Lord Grugtrim had waited the appropriate time of mourning before pressing his claim on Kurnar, and the Viscoutness of course.

He should have heard reply by now from his Toogarn, his personal Knight, sent to enquire after her hand. The knight was well known for accomplishing duty above most else, which was exactly why Lord Grugtrim had sent the knight to accomplish the task before any other local lord might push their claim. His patience was running quite thin as the man was overdue by almost twice the time necessary.

“Call for the wizard. I would have words with him!”

The messenger boy serving him ducked his head and quickly left the private lounge of the Baron, closing the door quietly behind him. The Lord Grugtrim busied himself with some paperwork while he waited, putting them aside with some disgust when he finally saw the wizard attending him, slipping through the door.

“Wizard! Any word from Knight Toogarn?”

“No, my lord. I have received no word from your knight.”

“No word? Have you called the good knight?”

“I have tried, Lordship, but there is no reply.”

Grugtrim considered for some time, mind working the problem before asking another question.

“Is the good knight dead?”

“That I know not, your lordship. I only know that the FarCall medallion is still functioning, though I fear I receive little from its call. It may be lost. Or the knight dead.”

Face wincing with frustration and disgust, the loss of a FarCall medallion would prove trying for a simple barony. He only hoped that it could be retrieved. Seeing as the wizard’s arts had proved unhelpful, he could only call for the abbot to attend him. He may be able to find his life! Or lack thereof! Grugtrim waved the wizard to the side, absentmindedly offering him a seat as he sent another messenger boy to seek out the abbot. As before, the abbot took some time to return but soon stood before his lord, awaiting his pleasure.

“Abbot! Could you verify the life of the knight Toogarn?”

“You fear death, my lord?”

“Exactly!”

“Certainly, my liege. I will have need of preparing the ritual. I will have word for you this evening at the even meal.”

“I will await your report. Please join me for supper in the main hall with news.

“Yes, my liege.”

The abbot bowed out of the Baron’s private lounge and wound his way back to his shrine, preparing for the great working of seeking life. The work and effort proved uneventful, everything working smoothly. The news, however, would prove to make supper anything but. The good knight Toogarn was dead.

When the Lord learned of this news, he was infuriated, but did not take out his anger on the men. While few would say that Grugtrim was a good lord, or even a good man, he at least did not treat his underlings poorly for simply accomplishing the tasks he’d set for them. The angry cries filled the main hall for a good ten minutes until Grugtrim finally brought himself under a modicum of control. The evening, and day, came to an end for the nobility but a great new work was beginning for all under his Lordship Grugtrim, for he had left his underlings a new command.

“Find me a life seer! Quickly!”