Dog of War

Camila and Lydia burst through the doors of the local clinic, "We have injured sophonts in dire need of medical attention!" 

 

Beckett tried to shift her position, struggling fruitlessly against the vines that kept her secure. "This really isn't all that serious, there's no need for an emergency." 

 

If Camila had a safe Class W, she would've injected her then and there. "You are bleeding ." 

 

"I'm not exactly delicate," the girl protested weakly. It was the single most absurd thing Camila ever heard. Not delicate? When she could feel the girl in her vines? How soft her body was? How fragile her bones were underneath? How gentle her breathing was? How the stress and tension sat in her muscles? When her blood was still on her vines?

 

The doors burst open, and the Vet, an Affini she had never seen before, stepped out. Another Affini- an attendant- pushing a large cart of medical gear followed behind. "What is the emergency?"

 

"My ward has a fairly large cut on her hand, and the other sophont has a broken wrist." Camila pointed to Lydia, attending to an unconscious Nick.

 

The vet raised Beckett's hand, examining it and scanning the wound. "I see, well don't worry, your ward is going to be perfectly fine." 

 

The vet moved to Lydia and leaned over, examining Nick for a few moments. "That's definitely broken, but also fairly easy to treat." The vet stood up and gave their best reassuring smile, "Abies Frax, 8th bloom, they/them. Please follow me."  

 

They dutifully followed as Abies led them each to a room in the medical center, stopping in front of its doors. "I'll treat the cut while my assistant preps the other sophont's wrist for surgery." Abies pointed at the door across from them. "There's a room in there, you can use that to relax while you wait. If I can have your sophont for a few minutes, I would like to get started."

 

Beckett was largely unresponsive now, her face settled into a teary, cold eyed stare directed at her hand. Her biorythm was so quiet, Camila could almost hear the buzzing returning. Oh stars, how could Camila let her go? She needed her. 

 

Lydia spoke softly, "I understand how you are feeling dear, but you need to hand her over now, okay?" 

 

Camila relaxed herself, her vines retracting from holding Beckett in place. She couldn't stop but steal one pet as she did so, allowing herself to enjoy running her vines through her hair. Abies, for their part, lifted her out of her vines with all the care and perfection she deserved, giving Camila a smile before taking her away. The grief hit the moment Beckett disappeared behind the operating room doors. 

 

Camila nearly unraveled, her form falling into disarray. She had failed her. Camila had promised Beckett she was safe here, twice , and she failed . How could she be her owner if she couldn't even provide something as basic as safety? Can she even really call herself an Affini? 

 

A few vines from Lydia tangled into her own, stilling them and breaking her out of the spiral. "Hey, it's alright." Her rhythm was bittersweet. Feeling Lydia push through her own sorrow helped Camila find her strength again, and she pulled herself together. 

 

"I-Im sorry, it's just-" Camila choked, this was all so unbecoming! 

 

Lydia held up a vine, asking for Camila to stop. She then pointed to the room across the hall. "Let's go talk." 

 

Camila nodded and followed her fellow Affini into the room. Lydia took a seat near the bed, and motioned for Camila to sit in the spot next to her. She could feel herself wilting as she slumped into the cushioned alcove. "I'm sorry." 

 

Lydia shook her head, "You have nothing to apologize for, Nick was my responsibility. I should have made sure to confiscate the knife from his utensils." 

 

That... was a decent point, she wasn't the only Affini present, but it still ate at her. "I told her she was safe , Lydia." 

 

Lydia sighed, and gave a weary, knowing smile. "I understand."

 

The other Affini's acknowledgement soothed her, but Camila's edges remained frayed. It was unlikely anything but holding Beckett again would be able to actually calm her. "How was Nick doing?"  

 

Lydia looked troubled. "I think some of his fingers might have been broken as well, and his wrist is in bad shape. I suppose he'll need to be ramped up for his implant now. So he'll barely even notice the injury and heal before recovering from the haustoric implant but..." Lydia sighed. "It wasn't supposed to be like this." 

 

That was a feeling Camila knew all too well. "I get it. I want Beckett to be ready so badly, to be healed enough that she's able to accept it." Perhaps it did make her a bad Affini, perhaps it was just a bit too selfish, but she wanted Beckett to have that chance. "It must be comforting to know they're yours, and disconcerting the way they found themselves in your vines." 

 

Lydia eased at that. "Thank you, Camila." The two Affini leaned on each other for some time, comforting the other for a moment. 

 

The vet entered the room, causing Camila to snap herself back together and both Affini to stand. "I have one very sleepy sophont for a 'Miss Verdun.'" Their vines opened to reveal one very displeased looking Beckett. There was a mitt on the injured hand, to keep it from being used.

 

Camila swept Beckett up into her arms in a second, sweet relief crashed through her as she held her pet, now safe. She could hardly keep herself from falling over her. "Are you okay? How are you feeling? Does anything hurt? Do you want a treat?" 

 

"I'm fine," Beckett glared up at her, and turning away before Camila could catch her gaze. Her biorhythm was still quiet, but the buzzing was no longer present. "It was just a cut. Would've been fine with just the bandaging." Camila could feel anger begin to prick up at Beckett's disregard for herself. 

 

The vet huffed. "Is that your professional opinion? I did not realize Terrans considered field medics the same as doctors." 

 

Beckett shrugged. "Just saying. I've had some experience with injuries, you know."

 

The vet ignored her, turning to Camila, <"Just keep her from using the hand for two days. It wasn't anything major but I would like to make sure it heals right. No strenuous activity today. She'll need help bathing as well, at least with the parts she can't reach."> Beckett shivered in her vines; she almost certainly picked that up. 

 

Lydia tapped Miss Verdun on the shoulder as she followed the Vet out, giving them the space, <"Good luck, I'll let you know when Nick is ready for that playdate.">

 

"Petal, are you sure you're fine? I'm worried about you."

 

"I've had plenty worse." Beckett deadpanned. 

 

Camila's vines screamed out to wrap the Terran in herself, and to never ever let her go. To force her to feel safe. "That's the problem! I-" she hesitated. "I said I would make sure you were safe, and I failed. I'm sorry."

 

Beckett blinked, momentarily stunned. "Why would I be upset about that? I told you that was impossible, I never once thought you actually could." Camila had catastrophically failed. Not just as her guardian but as an Affini. "If anything, the injury is my fault for not noticing the knife sooner, and for messing up the disarming." 

 

There was absolutely no way Camila was going to accept Beckett blaming herself. "Princess, you do not have to keep watch for yourself. You are supposed to feel safe, you are supposed to be safe."

 

Beckett scoffed, "Well one of us is trying to prove a negative," she held up her injured hand, leering at Camila now, "and the other one has evidence. If I simply disarmed him correctly, I would not be here."

 

Camila had to make this right. How could she make this right? Beckett was awfully stubborn when she wanted to be. Her refusal to accept 'safety' couldn't be allowed to stand, but the freshness of the accident was likely to cause problems. 

 

Beckett caught her off guard,  "So how's Sawyer?" 

 

She was concerned about the other Terran? That was encouraging. "Ah, well, he's still being treated for his wrist. Although, I think you might want to start calling him 'Nick,' cutie."

 

Beckett looked conflicted. "Does he have to be domesticated?" Wait, she was feeling guilty about Nick? 

 

"Little one, violence against others is a strict no-no. He attacked you." Camila gently corrected.

 

Beckett shrugged. "Yeah, but I kinda antagonized him, and nothing really happened." 

 

It was almost sweet to hear the little one try to defend the man that attacked her. "This," she coiled a vine around Beckett's injured arm, "is hardly nothing."

 

Beckett pulled away, "I just think he should get a second chance, is all." 

 

Camila sighed, "Sorry princess, that isn't up to you."

 

"I've done worse myself, you know." 

 

The words caught Camila off guard. Memories of the files Viola had shown her chilled her core. Fae had promised to show her even more tonight, when they went over it. Beckett wasn't the same sophont anymore though! "That's in the past now, right? You've been behaving so well and have shown so much growth in just the few days I've known you!" 

 

Beckett remained silent, brooding in her vines. Camila had really messed up; even if she wasn't entirely at blame for her injury, she had utterly failed to make her feel better or offer comfort after. The Class E could only do so much and the Z's couldn't help. She needed some H, B, and As- Camila needed to pick up the rest of her xenodrugs. She may be unprepared to be an owner, but she still had her pride as Affini. "Little one, do you still feel up to visiting with Daisy and Cordelia?"

 

"I guess." Beckett's voice was flat and tired. 

 

Camila took out her pad and messaged her friend.

 

[FrequencyFlower]: Hey I was going to bring Beckett over now, and we'll talk more once I get there, but she had a bad reunion with a crewmate and got hurt. She is feeling pretty down about the whole thing. I still need someone to watch her while I get the rest of the grafts she needs. 

 

[ComfyPlamnt]: Beckett got hurt? How? Are you doing alright? Also of course I can watch her. Come over, let's talk.

 

[FrequencyFlower]: There was an incident at lunch. I'm on my way, I'll tell you when I get there.

 

Camila sighed and stuffed the pad away, carrying Beckett out of the room and then out of the building. She walked a cleaner drone happily mopping up the last of Beckett's blood in the waiting room. 

 

"Uhm," Beckett broke her silence, "are you gonna carry me the whole way?" 

 

"Yes, you lost a decent bit of blood." Camila chided. "The vet said you are not to exert yourself, and I'll hear no nonsense about walking on your own." 

 

Beckett went quiet again. Stars, how Camila wished she could end this farcical wardship. She would have the tools to do it soon, to break her down and rebuild her as her happiest self. However, there was a sourness to the idea now; what if she messed up, and hurt her again? The fledgling floret was so fragile, could Camila really avoid hurting her again? Could she handle it if she hurt her again? Next time she might not have anyone to share the blame with either. 

 

Viola, perhaps, had been right. She wasn't ready for a sophont like Beckett. Even so, Camila felt a duty to the girl, to do the best she can for her. She may not be the right one to hold her leash in the end, but she had to help Beckett until that Affini came along. 

 

She arrived at Cordelia's door, still ruminating over Beckett's future, and her own. The door slid open before Camila could bring herself to knock. "Camila! Please, come in!" Cordelia smiled, stepping aside to make room. "Are you doing okay?" 

 

Seeing her friend nearly caused Camila to have another breakdown, but she had to stay strong a few moments longer. For Beckett's sake. She made sure the girl couldn't see her head shake as she stepped into the foyer of the Hab. 

 

Cordelia gave her a reassuring smile and a nod. "Daaai-sy" Cordelia called in a song like manner, "I have a surprise for you~" 

 

It did not take long for the perpetual sunbeam to burst her way through the doors, her overalls  caked with dirt in several places. 

 

Daisy made a long audible gasp as she saw Camila, "Oh, Miss Verdun! Hi!"

 

It was really hard to stay all that upset when presented with such an overwhelmingly adorable display. "Hello, Daisy."

 

Daisy perched up on her tiptoes, trying to see into her arms. "Um, is Beckett with you?" 

 

Camila nodded, "She is. She's fine, but a little hurt, so be careful with her today, alright?" Beckett made a displeased grunt in response. 

 

Daisy looked confused and worried, "Huh? Hurt?" 

 

"There was an accident. It's nothing to worry about, petal. Just watch her hand, okay?" As though she were made of porcelain and glass, Camila helped the girl down to her feet. Slowly releasing the girl, the final few vines lingered before retreating as well. It was just an hour or two, she would be holding her again soon. 

 

Daisy immediately wrapped her arms around Beckett, pulling herself into a tight hug as the other girl stood firm. "I'm glad you're okay!"

 

Beckett cracked a smile for the first time since before lunch, and returned the hug. "Well hi to you too."

 

Daisy swelled up, beaming as she pulled back enough to face Beckett. "You remembered to hug! 

 

Camila felt a wave of relief, the emerging floret she had been coaxing out was still in there. This had only been a set back, the girl would bounce back. 

 

"Awww," Cordelia cooed, "aren't you two just adorable?" Daisy giggled at the praise, while Beckett grew gloomy again. "Daisy, why don't you show her around and catch up while Camila and I talk for a bit?"

 

Daisy lit up, squealing in delight, "Oooooh I've been wanting to show you my garden forever!" She let go of Beckett's torso to grab her good hand and began dragging her towards the living room. "C'mon!"

 

"Daisy, I haven't even been in the compact a week." Beckett protested, despite allowing herself to be moved and wearing a faint grin. "You've wanted to show me your garden for like four days at most." 

 

The door to the living room slid open and Daisy pulled her through, "Yeah, well, it's really cool!"

 

"Have fun, Princess!" Camila called just as the door slid closed again. The drop that followed was just as fast, and she found herself in Cordelia's vines, falling to pieces. She was positively wilting, and felt like she was on the verge of reblooming. 

 

"Shhh," Cordelia comforted, "it's alright love, she's alright." 

 

That only made it worse, and it already felt like her core was about to split itself in half. "I was supposed to protect her, and she got hurt , Cordelia. What if Viola is right? What if-" 

 

"None of that." Cordelia interjected. "I understand where fae's coming from, and fae does have an argument for ending her wardship early, but Beckett needs you , Camila."

 

The reassurance helped Camila pull together a bit, but it still ate away at her. "I'm just- I've never been less sure of my ability to give her the care she needs. What if she gets hurt again? What if I hurt her?"

 

Cordelia sighed and gave her a wistful smile, "Even we can't always prevent everything from harming them, as much as we'd like to. We can only do our best, and help them pick themselves up after something happens."

 

That wasn't the most encouraging thing, but it was what Camila needed to hear. "Right... Thank you Cordelia." She still felt pretty awful, but managed to pull herself together nearly completely. There were still a few things out of place, but only a few. "I'm still really nervous about meeting Viola tonight."

 

"Surely you aren't actually considering rescinding your notice?" Cordelia was incredulous. 

 

Camila nodded solemnly. "Beckett deserves the best owner she can get, If-" she nearly choked up as she said the words, "if that's not me, I can live with that, for her sake." 

 

"Ridiculous!" Cordelia scoffed, now fully incensed.  "I've seen the way that she acts around you. Stars, you're the only Affini she's even moderately relaxed around! If you scoured all the stars you would find at best an equal, and I'm not going to let you disparage yourself, Camila."

 

"B-but-" Camila started to protest. 

 

Cordelia stayed firm. "No. You may have made a few mistakes, but I will not let you make another. Like I said, Beckett needs you , Camila, and I'm willing to help you so you can be the Affini you need to be for her." 

 

Stars... It was hard to argue with Cordelia. What she did to deserve such a supportive friend was beyond her. "Thank you, Cordelia. That means a lot to me."

 

"Do you want me to be there?" 

 

"No, I need to do it on my own." If Beckett was to be hers, she needed to be able to defend her claim. The idea of convincing an Affini with almost tenfold more experience that she could handle Beckett was daunting. Even more so considering Beckett got hurt and that it was Viola that found out her secret. To think the little one had been struggling for so long and Camila didn't even suspect... 

 

Cordelia sighed, "If you insist, but if she starts giving you trouble or saying anything about your capability as an Affini, message me and I'll be there right away." 

 

"Oh? You're going to scare off the Ninth bloom for me?" Camila smirked, letting her weight lean into Cordelia. 

 

Cordelia let herself give a bit, but kept them both upright as the two became increasingly tangled. "For you, dear, there is no one I wouldn't stand against." Cordelia smiled, and for a moment, everything felt right again. 

 

She couldn't stay in this moment, no matter how much she wanted to. "Thank you, but, uhm, I should go get Beckett's xenodrugs..." 

 

"Of course." Cordelia nodded, starting the process of disentangling herself. Camila helped where she could, but it still took nearly a minute for them to be fully separated again. Stars, it was a miracle Cordelia didn't complain. "Don't worry about your little princess, I suspect a bit of time with Daisy is exactly what she needs. I'll keep an eye on her, she'll be safe." 

 

Camila took Cordelia's hands into her own, "Thank you. For everything." The two shared a smile in the quiet moment before Camila pulled away, towards the door. "I'll be back in about two hours."

 

Cordelia nodded, "Of course. I love you Camila."

 

"Oh, uh, well, I love you too, Cordelia!" Camila responded without thinking, before quickly exiting in embarrassment. Stars, what was she thinking? It did feel nice to say those words, and she had meant them, but that wasn't the issue. The issue was it seemed like Cordelia hadn't likely meant them the way she did. As Camila made her way to pick up the grafts, it felt as though she had added to her troubles.