I Became a Raid Boss

“Ugh, my back hurts and my legs hurt…. It feels like my whole body is wrecked….”

“….”

“…Kana. What was that laugh? You’re not laughing at me, are you? Nah, our sweet Kana wouldn’t do that.”

“You’re right, I was laughing.”

“Aren’t you being a bit too bold?!”

Is there any reason I shouldn’t be?

They say a gentleman’s revenge is timely even after ten years, but my revenge, being not a gentleman, happened much quicker.

Of course, I’m not completely over it yet, but seeing Joanie in that state cheered me up a bit.

Her face was not like that when we first set off.

After days of cloudy weather, on the day we started, it miraculously became sunny, just like her face brightening up.

But as time passed, dark clouds began to gather, and eventually, she turned into that.

“I had no idea riding a horse would be this hard….”

Joanie grumbled as she struggled to get off the horse, just as much as it was hard to climb on.

“If I become strong like Kana, I’ll be able to ride easily, right?”

If riding takes mastery, it must be because the horse is a polymorphed dragon or unicorn.

Seeing younger kids ride much better than her, I couldn’t shake the thought that it wasn’t a matter of mastery.

“Like Kana?”

“…No.”

Besides, Apostles have abnormally great physical abilities compared to mastery levels.

Even if they got hit by an orc’s club, they’d endure a few hits. There’s no way they’d die from a little horseback riding.

Conclusion: Joanie struggles like that because she’s a beginner.

Thud, thud, thud.

“…Doesn’t that conclusion sound odd?”

“A beginner is just a beginner.”

“Did Kana just become a tsundere all of a sudden…?”

Ignoring Joanie mumbling to herself in Arkish, I replied.

“Well, if you’re riding all tense like that, of course, it’s gonna hurt.”

Being tense means having strength inside your body.

After sitting like that for hours with all that tension, it’s natural for the muscles to cry out in pain.

Tension can be the lubricant for smoothly responding to what comes next, but that only applies when it’s moderate; too much tension makes things worse.

“…If you knew that, you should have told me sooner.”

“Joanie.”

“Yeah?”

“It’s something you realize better when you experience it firsthand.”

It’s more effective to go through something than to hear advice a hundred times.

You can trust me, as I’ve made many comrades learn to behave like humans through my experiences.

And whenever I say this, they always respond with—

“…If I told you, you’d have understood!”

“Yep, I don’t believe you.”

It’s something I’ve heard countless times, so it’s not even new anymore.

At first, I believed that remark and tried saying it again, but it only confirmed I wasn’t wrong.

“Tension, huh? …Owie! W-Wait, let’s rest a bit first. I can’t do anything right now, it hurts too much…”

With a serious expression, Joanie tried to get back on the horse but gave up after whining about her muscle pain.

While chewing on jerky and watching her, I shook my head.

She’s really trying hard.

*

While I was taking a break after getting off the horse.

“Uh?”

Joanie’s eyes widened as she spotted something.

“A herd of water buffalo?”

“It’s a monster group called ‘Rain Buffalo.’”

“A monster? They look like cows.”

“Not much different.”

The herd of Rain Buffalo, seemingly dozens of them, passed by in the direction she was looking.

“Rain Buffalo is delicious.”

“…You classify monsters by taste?”

“?”

“…Sorry. Was that too harsh?”

“Then what else is there, if not taste?”

“Oh, so that was the issue.”

Joanie nodded as if she understood.

“True, with Kana’s skills, any monster would be no risk.”

“That’s not true.”

She overestimates me.

No matter how skilled I am, I can’t easily kill any monster like slicing steak.

Leviathan, Kraken, Peridis, and so on… how many are there?

Dragons are classified as monsters too.

“Dragons are monsters? Wait, that’s not the point. Leviathan or Kraken, what was it?”

“Peridis.”

“Right, Peridis. I don’t know how strong they are, but they must be at that level. Just looking at the name, they don’t seem like common monsters.”

“True.”

If those things roamed freely, this Ardina Continent would have become a monster paradise long ago.

I’ve only seen them through stories or books, so I don’t know how powerful they really are, but from the descriptions alone, they certainly don’t feel weak.

“But they really are delicious.”

Rain Buffalo is a high-quality ingredient, unlike orcs, which are hit or miss.

It’s said that while some people may have eaten it once, nobody has eaten it twice.

“…Huh? Isn’t it ‘there are those who have never eaten it, but no one has eaten it once’?”

“Rain Buffalo meat is expensive.”

While you can manage to eat it once, you wouldn’t buy it again since it’s too pricey, leading to the saying about its taste lingering in fond memories.

Well, in reality, there are probably more people who have never tasted it, so you can think of it as just that delicious.

If you’re still not getting it, referring to it as meat served on the table of the Royal Family might make it clearer.

“And the milk’s delicious too.”

“Yeah, milk is important.”

“…”

“…I didn’t say anything?”

“You did.”

“I wasn’t teasing Kana. I was just stating it’s important!”

As if!

Anyway, from the meat and milk to the leather and horns, not a single part of the Rain Buffalo carcass goes to waste.

It would have been great if we could domesticate them, but sadly, that’s just a wish.

“Huh? Why can’t we? They don’t seem that violent…”

“Because they’re monsters.”

According to those who tried thinking like Joanie, it usually ended one of two ways: either they got gored by Rain Buffalo’s horns and went to Edel or failed in a desperate venture and ended up beside Edel.

There’s a reason why they call Rain Buffalo monsters.

They may look docile, but when it rains, they become incredibly tough and wild.

They rampage, smashing anything in sight, so you can’t keep them confined or challenge them recklessly.

“So, can’t we just raise them in areas where it doesn’t rain much?”

“It doesn’t rain much; it never doesn’t rain at all, you know.”

And if we raised them in such places, another problem would arise.

“Rain Buffalo will die if not exposed to rain.”

They become wild in the rain but die without it? What kind of flawed being is this?!

“Can’t we use just water?”

“Nope.”

They respond only to the rain from the sky.

I don’t know the principles behind that, but did monster kinds ever need things like that?

“Hmm… saying that makes me kind of curious. What does it taste like?”

“If you’re curious, then just eat it.”

“…Huh?”

“What are you waiting for?”

Hurry up!

As I stared at her, Joanie broke into a cold sweat.

“…You’re not telling me to catch them, are you?”

“You’re curious, right?”

“Just because I’m curious doesn’t mean I have to solve that curiosity!”

Thud!

“Oh boy.”

While saying that, Joanie was pushed away by me and rolled across the plain.

The leisurely eating Rain Buffalo herd perked their ears upon noticing Joanie.

“Um, if I attack one, will the others swarm?”

“? Of course.”

“So, they’d all charge at once?”

“Yep.”

“…Can you do it? Why are you doing this to me?!”

I shrugged.
What are you talking about?

“It’s really delicious, you know.”

“Not eating it! No, can’t eat it!”

Letting out a squeal, Joanie hurriedly took a few steps back.
Then the Rain Buffalo lost interest and went back to munching grass.

“Hmph.”

Is this really that difficult?

I moved on, leaving Joanie behind.
When I got to the distance she rolled to, the buffalo looked up but went back to eating when they saw me.

…This feels bad.

They say beasts and monsters are sensitive; if it was just a rumor or if these ones are particularly sensitive, I don’t know.
But something felt off with how their looks were different from when they saw Joanie.

As I approached closer, the buffalo finally regarded me with wary eyes.

If they fled, I would have chased them. But staying put while I approach means they think they can handle a threat.

“How cocky.”

Thud!

I raised my hand and struck the head of the one in front.
The gesture was light, but the consequence was heavy.

With a dull sound of a hit, one Rain Buffalo collapsed, its skull caved in.

“Uwooooh!”

Seeing their friend’s demise, the remaining buffalo turned hostile.
Their earlier calm demeanor disappeared, replaced with scraped hooves and heavy snorts.

They looked ready to charge at any moment.

“Ready to fight?”

I picked up the fallen buffalo by its horn.
Its limp body lifted into the air at my command.

“Wooooo!”

“Really?”

“…Woo.”

The sound of their calls clearly lost some of its spirit.
Even the dumbest of monsters could sense this wasn’t good.

Sure, they lost a comrade a moment too late in realization, but that was better than them all getting wiped out, right?

Soon, they busied themselves watching each other’s reactions.
If they were human, wouldn’t they exchange words like “You go first.” or “You’re in front of me.”?

After a flurry of eye exchanges, the buffalo’s looks sharpened.
In the end, they made their decision.

…Moooor.
They ignored the limp body of their companion and returned to eating grass.

I nodded in satisfaction as I dragged my spoils toward Joanie.

“Moooor!”
“Moooor!”

As one of them started to cry out, the others joined in.
The chorus of dozens of Rain Buffalo echoed across the plains.

Were they lamenting because they couldn’t avenge their buddy?
Their cries sounded tragically woeful.

“Shut up.”

That’s not my concern; it’s just noisy.

“Or attack me right now.”

“… .”

The once-echoing field fell eerily silent, as if pretending nothing ever happened.

Cowards making noise without the guts to retali.

“Kana…”

As I dragged the Rain Buffalo carcass before Joanie, she looked down at me with a complicated expression.

“I don’t know if I should say this, but…”

“…?”

“…You, uh… never mind.”

What was she about to say? She mumbled and hesitated.
To build my curiosity and then just back off?

“What’s up?”

“If Kana hears it, it might hurt her feelings.”

“I don’t care.”

“R-Really?”

I nodded.

Many have said hurtful things to me, so I’m used to it by now; it doesn’t bother me at all.

Most importantly—

“If I get hurt, I can just hurt back.”

I’m not good with words, so I’ve repaid those who hurt me with physical pain.
So, they probably wouldn’t complain as we faced off in our respective strengths.

Upon hearing my words, Joanie trembled and screamed.

“…I’m scared!”

In the end, Joanie never revealed what she had intended to say.
…What on earth was it?

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