Madman’s Retirement

“So, everyone ships the two?” inquired Grant as he shared mugs of honey amongst the adventurers. “Yup, it’s been going on for a while” said an older adventurer, whom Grant had come to know was named Leon. Man was mostly a retired adventurer, but had tagged along because the merchant happened to be his brother-in-law, and his wife had been a merchant’s daughter. According to him this was a round trip, and his wife was at the York outpost, where they would pick her up on the way back to one of the trading centers of the Ro-mana-n empire.

In order to really get some juicy gossip, Grant had started the habit of sharing honey amongst the adventurers. The bear certainly liked it, as it was always happy to spread honey, and the adventurers were happy to partake once they heard that he’d partnered with a honey bear. Monster honey was generally beneficial, and it was known that honey bear honey was great for one’s health. Even Leon looked more energetic and youthful than he had been before the honey.

“It started when the two first showed up. Natalie’s a pretty thing as we all know” the group that had gathered for the drinking session nodded “and certain adventurers are certainly more boorish than others” adventurers nodded even more feverishly at that. “One day a certain e-class adventurer thought he was hot shit and tried to hit on her. You know the whole story. Women isn’t interested, man thinks that doesn’t matter, Dain steps in and breaks his arm. No mana used. No one bothers her again afterwards.” Grant whistles, ” Good on him, though that’s good friendship more than anything else.” Leon nods in agreement. “Yeah, but there’s more you see. Anytime a man tries to flirt a little, Dain’s just there a little further away, observing the whole situation. He ain’t glowering or anything, but most guys get a bit unnerved and end conversations early. Course he ain’t the only one.”

One female adventurer raises her hand. “One time I tried flirting with Dain, man’s got good looks and who wouldn’t want the attention he pays to Natalie?” She takes a chug of that golden nectar and continues “Natalie has one hell of a stare. Somehow, she seems able to tell who’s flirting and who’s chatting, and only one gets the stare. The girl’s managed to scare every girl around away from flirting with him. Why, I once saw a b class adventurer turn and run with her tail tucked between her legs. She isn’t as strong, but she has one hell of a death stare.”

“Wait, wait, let me guess.” Grant makes some grand gestures with his hand. “One of them is too dense to realize and the other is possessive, but too embarrassed to make any moves?” Murmurs of agreements and chuckles go through the group. “We’ve got bets going around about when one of them start realizing or confessing their feelings.” Said one adventurer with an eyepatch and a funny looking hat. Funnier when you realize he hasn’t lost an eye, but rather he’s using that silly pirate trick for some reason.

“I’ve got bets on a year or two.”

“A few weeks probably. They’ve already been at it for a year.”

“I don’t thing they’ll ever get together at this rate. Count me out.”

Grant decided to chime in. Leaning in and smiling, he said: “Well y’know, currently the two of them are out training together. What say you we have a little fun?” Grant was currently using a duplication technique to be in two places at once, but once he stopped using it, they’d be all alone.

Everyone smiled, and their faces seemed almost ghastly, illuminated in the darkness of the night.

…

Natalie had been so happy when they implied that she and Dain had been kissing. She wishes they had been. She’d been so happy for Dain ever since they found that Dain had another way of getting strong and that they’d been able to find a man so willing to teach him. He was a weird man, but seemed to be a kind man underneath… whatever he was wearing. He dressed rather garishly and she hoped if nothing else that they would not have to dress like that.

Ever since they were young Dain and Natalie had stuck together. Even at a young age she had stuck with Dain through thick and thin, and as they got older, she wanted him more and more. She didn’t like those boys who approached her, those annoying fleas. She was grateful that Dain drove them away, and it even made her happy he did so. None of them were like Dain, or as good as him.

He’d even set them up together in a nice and secluded area. Perhaps he could help her with getting closer to Dain. After all, he was already helping push Dain closer to her. Fuhuhuhu… Natalie squirmed in her sleeping bag, dreaming of the day Dain would be completely hers.

…

Dain could not sleep. Try as he might, he couldn’t. Touching her jugulars had been embarrassing. The way she moaned and shuddered as her body feed on his qi. The circulation had pushed some of her qi into his body, and he felt himself craving more. The desire to cradle her, to hold her, to, to to… Dain buried his face into his pillow as his cheeks flushed. He’d been Natalie’s friend since they were children, and yet recently he’d been feeling this way, covetous somehow. Jealous even Every time a guy tried flirting with Natalie he couldn’t help but drill holes into them with his bare eyes, thank goodness Natalie didn’t seem to realize he’d been scaring away all the guys. He cursed his new “sensei” who’d set him up in such an embarrassing situation, yet at the same time, was happy for the alone time. Still wanted to smack him a little.

Poor Dain would not get a wink of sleep as he went back and forth on this through the night.