Natasha the Halve

140 – BCE and ABC.



We cleaned ourselves with enchanted towels and got dressed.

“I'm absolutely knackered,” Pokora yawned, covering her mouth. She stretched and let out a long sigh.

“We have a few hours left of watch,” I pointed out, sitting down on one of the chairs. “And I would commit child trafficking for a bath.”

The Elf turned to me with a disgusted expression. “What the fuck?”

I shrugged and retrieved a juice bottle from my storage. “I like being clean. Those enchanted towels don't do it for me.”

She shook her head and sighed. “But child trafficking? Seriously?”

I nodded in thought. “Then... I would commit war crimes?”

“Better,” Pokora accepted with a nod. “Still oddly specific,” she insisted.

I took a sip and sighed. “I would punch the Pope in the gut,” I offered.

“Why not just say you'd kill for a bath?” She tried, raising both eyebrows. “Like, you know, normal people.”

“Now, now,” I muttered and raised both hands in mock shock. “Let's not get extreme. Killing doesn't get you a bath, I checked.”

The Elf covered her face and tried not to laugh. “That is tragic, wrong, and hilarious in ways it shouldn't be,” she managed to get out.

“It do be like that,” I agreed with a sigh.

She laughed and clapped twice.

We spent the rest of our shift joking and chatting.


Morning came and we had breakfast, then mounted up and continued moving north.

Yolin guided Pochi to trot next to Sonya. She had her true sight sunglasses on, a white shirt, black shorts, and had her hair down.

I turned to the woman who looked like a tourist and chuckled.

“We're approaching Ladania,” she informed me.

I nodded. “And what is that?” I inquired, not remembering having heard that name.

She smiled and replied, “A city where 70% of people are Chasers. It's at a spot where the borders of Lumin Kingdom, Nemephan, and UNC meet.”

I tilted my head. “UNC?”

The Oni arched an eyebrow. “The Unified Nymph Collective,” she replied, a little confused as well. “You met the representatives at the Royal Banquet...”

“Right,” I uttered, connecting the name with the abbreviation. “First time hearing it as UNC,” I explained. “Have you been to Ladania before?”

My girlfriend nodded. “It's very good to find companions around this side of Leks. On the top ten cities around the world,” she pitched the city.

“Wow,” I uttered, feeling expectations form in my mind. “Why top ten?”

Yolin shrugged. “You'll find out when we get there,” she cheekily replied.

I nodded. “How does the Chaser business work, anyway?” I inquired.

She bit her lower lip then smiled. “Well, we did some back in Mountroad and Lakeview,” she began. “Find a bounty, delve a dungeon or leave the city, kill monsters or animals, go back to turn the bounty in, get paid. There's more to it but those are the basics.”

My eyebrows knitted in concern. “Sounds... unregulated,” I commented with a healthy dose of skepticism.

Yolin nodded. “It is a hazardous occupation, yeah,” she agreed. “There aren't many laws a Chaser has to abide to, but the people offering bounties do... so that's a positive.”

I tried wrapping my head around it, but found myself questioning things. “What if someone offers a bounty and fucks over the Chaser?”

The Oni's face morphed into one of pure confusion. “Who, in their right mind, would fuck with people that eat, sleep, and breathe combat? Word would spread, Scouts would steal from them to the point of bankruptcy, Wizards would destroy their workplace, Clerics would give them diseases, Performers would slander and defame them publicly... the point is they won't take it in silence.”

My eyebrows climbed my forehead and my eyes widened a little. “Chasers sound pretty fucking unhinged,” I pointed out.

Yolin shrugged. “We risk our lives,” she argued. “And should be appropriately rewarded for it.”

I looked up at the tree canopy blocking most of the sky. A few small patches allowed for the suns to shine through. “Would they get in trouble with the law?”

“Yeah,” she replied. “It's considered breach of contract to fuck over a Chaser.”

I looked back at Yolin. “The person offering the bounty gets in trouble?” I asked for clarification.

The Oni nodded. “Naturally,” she replied with certainty. “Some try to, even though they know the law. Greed is a nasty thing to witness. Lives should not be devalued in favor of money.”

“I see,” I muttered, understanding more. “Walk me through the life of a Chaser,” I requested. “Yours, for example.”

“Well,” she began, looking forward. “First is BCE- Basic Compulsory Education. It begins at age five, and ends at age ten. They give us the tools to find our path in life. It was either Warrior or Cleric for me,” she chuckled. “I like to fight with my fists so the choice was obvious: to turn my body into something sturdier than any shield made by mortals.” She balled a fist and looked at it. “So far I've succeeded,” she commented with a laugh. “I went to a monastery that specialized in front-line Clerics and got my Monk class after ten years. I stayed another year to find a suitable class to go after and was recommended to go to Patuk and learn from the Orks.”

“Cool,” I praised with a nod.

Yolin gave me a smile and continued, “I needed money to make the trip so I joined parties around the country to clear dungeons. I'm not that good at healing so I made sure we followed the ABC.”

“What's that?” I inquired with interest.

“Always Bring Clerics,” my girlfriend replied.

“Smart,” I commented.

She nodded. “We had a good thing going, made enough money to get good stuff like emergency elixirs and scrolls, weapon and armor maintenance, replace them if they broke and whatnot. I had to save up to buy my first storage item so that postponed my departure by a few years. I was surprised at the amount of expenses dedicating my life to combat required, but kept at it. One day we came back from a delve and found out Miraztor was around.”

I hummed in interest.

“He was...” she took a deep breath. “Literally worlds apart in terms of power. I saw him pass by and realized how big the world was. He had this... huge healing aura that covered the entire city, even reaching down into the dungeons around. People talked about it for weeks.”

“Damn,” I muttered, impressed by the man.

“Yeah,” Yolin agreed with a nod. “Shit was insane. So, I started wondering... If I were to reach that level of power, just how durable would I become? That question kept me up at night for a long time. So, I decided to learn more about things I had been mostly ignoring so far like the fact a smithy should have at least three Craftsman certificates to be worth entering, read the law regarding the contracts I had been accepting without a second thought, the languages I would need to know during my travels to Patuk, etc. Being a Chaser is not just bam bam, kill, money, wah,” she chuckled. “At that point I had gone to a lot of islands and gone through every single low-tier dungeon there was. Equipment lasted longer, healing wasn't as necessary, and money was good.”

Pochi growled in agreement under Yolin.

“I got this good boy when I decided to leave Red Island,” she chuckled, patting the over-sized dog's head. “I left the party I was in and headed out into the world with the goal of reaching the limit, and if I'm lucky, break it.”

I nodded, enjoying the story she was sharing. “How expensive is being a Chaser? Like, precisely.”

“The healing elixirs I need due to my classes are twenty silver coins each,” she recalled. “I used to buy at least one hundred if the party's Cleric didn't have Onis in their healing menu, which unfortunately happened more often than I liked. That's 20 gold coins just on elixirs. The usual delve lasted from two to three months, and a full clear could last a year tops with a good party setup and the Cleric can heal Onis. That resulted in around 200 gold coins for each member on average for a party of twelve people. Eliso, my former party's Cleric and partner, was an Elf that knew Oni anatomy so that was great to clear dungeons. Getting my chest wrap fixed costed around a gold coin depending on the damage, and ten if I had to replace it, same for my trousers. Buying five was standard as preparation. That's 100 gold coins and some change. Food and lodging was shared to save up, which left me with around fifty gold coins a year, which I used for the next dungeon delve,” she finalized with a nod.

“Didn't Eliso heal you, though?” I probed. “That'd be 20 extra gold coins.”

She shook her head. “Having elixirs is a must even if the Cleric can heal me,” she pointed out. “Now, Alyssa's healing is super efficient and powerful so I have them laying around my storage. Plus, that stupidly over-tuned staff you gave her makes her healing even more absurd. And the gear you gave me makes me even more durable. Everything stacks to dumb levels.”

I nodded. “Damn right it does,” I chuckled.

“Anyway,” she sighed with a smile. “Back on topic. Depending on the Wizards on the party, you'd need scrolls to summon light, and those go for fifty copper coins a piece. You need at least five a day in total. Those are communal expenses since everyone pools a bit of money for that kind of thing. At least five gold coins worth of food to last a year. Camping equipment which includes an enchanted lantern for fifty silver coins, enchanted tents for ten silver coins each, pots and pans which are cheap, enchanted tools to start a fire for fifty copper coins, enchanted towels to maintain hygiene for five silver coins, and the expenses go up if you want to be comfortable during the night. If you want to make super sure no member will die, you'll want to buy elixirs which increase toughness, sharpen the senses, scrolls to protect your mind, spirit, and soul.”

“Hmmm...” I nodded.

“But the experience is worth it,” Yolin added. “It's fun, you meet interesting people, travel the world, learn things you never thought you would, maybe meet that special someone along the way,” she gave me a wink, “and get stronger and stronger.”

I giggled and blew her a kiss.

She leaned towards me and gave me a peck on the lips.

“Are you happy?” I asked after returning the kiss.

“I am,” she confirmed with a big nod and a big smile, fixing her posture on top of Pochi. “And I wouldn't change it for anything.”

I winced. “That's a death flag!”

She burst out in laughter.

I kept asking question and she was more than happy to answer.


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