Origin: How I Became A Magical Girl’s Hapless Sidekick In A Craptastic World

"Willis Kong did what to you!?" Midori shouted incredulously.

"Yeah," I said. I sighed, tilting my head back and staring up at the sky. I sat on a park bench outside, taking it easy after school. I was still exhausted and spent, but I wanted to tell Midori what had happened yesterday.

"He pulled me into this room and I floated in the air in some kind of windstorm for over an hour. I thought I was going to die, but he ended up just leaving me in there laughing like the prick that he is."

"That asshole!" Midori exclaimed. "He really pushed it too far this time."

"Yeah." I frowned. "I figure it's not the first time that he's really done some messed up shit, but it's the first time he's really successfully gone after me. Thankfully after a bit over an hour, Natasha came in and saved me before I had a fucking mental breakdown or something."

"Natasha? She yanked you out of the air?"

"Yeah, Natasha came and saved me," I explained. "I guess she was passing through or something. I don't know how that circle thing Willis and his thugs trapped me in works, but thank goodness she came in."

Midori gave me an unreadable stare before shaking her head and responding, "Well, you're okay now, so that's good."

"Yeah."

We sat in silence for a few moments. The only sound was the quiet chatter of families and couples walking around.

"After that, we just kind of sat on the swings here and talked for a few hours. Took a walk through the park and all," I said, gesturing aimlessly around me.

"She uh, she wanted to make sure that I was, you know, okay."

Midori gave me a weird look.

"What?" I asked curiously.

"Nothing." She smiled, stifling a giggle. "I'm just glad you're okay."

I rolled my eyes. "Well, we talked for a bit, and then we took the subway downtown, went our separate ways, and that was it."

"Thanks," I gave Midori a weak half-smile.

"What did you talk about?" She asked.

I shrugged, "Oh, y'know, this and that. I just wanted to get out of the school for some air after Willis pulled his shit on me. We talked about our childhoods and favorite foods and whatnot. She's a lot cooler than people give her credit for."

I didn't know why, but I felt like I was subconsciously walking on eggshells around Midori. I was probably just paranoid.

Midori gave me a half smile, "She... really is."

She stared off into the distance, and my thoughts wandered.

Just a day ago, I felt like I'd almost died. I'd been wrapped up in a bizarre, arcane windstorm. My eardrums were still ringing from the pressure of the wind I'd been forced to endure, even after sleeping it off. It would have been pretty funny to make it this far only to get taken out by a jackass of a bully yesterday.

But now, somehow, for some reason, the entire thing felt like it was nothing more than a dream.

The air was soft. The sky was sunny but not too bright. A cool breeze ran through the air. Families walked about, kids laughing and playing. A couple walked by us, holding hands.

Was this what Earth was like before the Imperatore?

Was this what people were supposed to be like?

Granted, life hadn't ended entirely on Earth. It was in a bad state but not quite post-apocalyptic. We'd picked up the pieces over there, and one generation wasn't enough to completely destroy the civilizations built up for centuries. It was the only Earth I'd grown up knowing, however.

With vast swathes of the world now infested with Chaos Beasts — food, energy, and luxuries alike were scarce. Technically, while Terra was decades ahead in information technology and an entirely new field in Magitech, Earth had a massive lead over Terra in all kinds of strange industrial know-how before the cataclysm.

Earth had a lot to offer regarding chemical knowledge, conventional energy science, agriculture, and manufacturing techniques. There was a lot of knowledge to be shared and gained on both sides, but the practicality of that science had been reset in a sense. Now, you couldn't go from Philadelphia to Boston alone without getting eaten alive or turned into a zombie. That is, at least without an armed convoy or a Magical Girl patrolling the roads. As a result, our comparative advantages in logistics systems, energy, manufacturing, and all that boring stuff would be nullified until Earth was secure.

And, of course, there was the danger of getting lost and ending up in a Straparola Zone. That was just in North America alone.

Countries across the world had come to a crashing halt, but people clung to their lives in the cities in whatever scraps of life they could piece together. As such, schools continued. Economic activity was crippled, but people continued to go to work. The internet existed, but bandwidth and connectivity were shit. Power outages were common, and our water processing facilities came under attack from time to time. The various military juntas that governed Earth were stretched beyond capacity.

In the years since the Imperatore, people had gotten a lot more self-sufficient as a whole. I'd even read in an article once that wildlife returned in force to the ruins of New York City.

"I take it you and Natasha talked a lot," Midori said, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah." I said. "We did."

A flash of sadness seemed to pass through her eyes.

"Yeah." She said. "Yeah, that's good."

"It's good?"

"Yeah, I mean, she never talked about her family or much of her life to me," she explained. "It sounds like she really opened up."

"Yeah, I think she did a bit," I said.

I shrugged and turned my head to look at the people walking around.

"Thanks a lot for listening," I said to Midori as I got up.

"No problem." Midori nodded. "Reach out anytime. Just..."

She bit her lip for a second and looked at me intently.

"What?" I asked.

"Keep an eye out for Tasha. She's a tough girl, but she can be very fragile at the same time. I'm pretty worried about her."

"I'll do what I can." I nodded. "I erm, wouldn't want anything to happen to Natasha. She's pretty cool."

She smiled warmly, "Good to hear."

I smiled back, waved, and then turned and walked off.

Pulling out my phone, I saw I had a text from Spencer.

Hey, we're doing a test run for the project and would like you to tag in. You up to it, bro?

I narrowed my eyes, thinking. As much as I'd like to stretch my limits, my body still ached, and my throat hurt from yesterday.

Eh, fuck it, I thought to myself.

I'll be there in a sec.

Good, see you soon.

I kicked at a pebble, sending it sailing off into the distance.

It was a lovely day today. Why not?

 

◆◆◆

 

"Wow, that was... a quick turnaround." I stared in disbelief at the sight in front of me.

"Well, that's why we're some of the best in our generation, my man," Spencer grinned.

The sun was setting. The only sounds that could be heard were the wind blowing through the leaves and the occasional birds chirping.

"You really think that'll work?" I asked, eyeing the human-like robot sitting in the middle of the open field we'd taken for the test run. It was wearing full emergency rescue gear, complete with a Chaos Capacitor.

The gear was primarily black and blue, with yellow lightning streaks painted through it and woven through a school logo on its chest. Despite its metal chassis, I could almost mistake it for a human, which was the point of its design. It looked like a Tokusatsu protagonist, like Kamen Rider or a Power Ranger.

It was a bit hokey looking, but I trusted that the small cameras attached to the front of its head were picking up images. Ivan lazily checked its readings on a laptop, laying back on a blanket on the grass. I was pretty sure he was straining his neck more than anything with that posture.

"Looks good, Chief," Ivan drawled, flashing a thumbs up at Eugene. The lanky boy pumped a skinny arm in the air.

"Fuck yeah, it'll work." Spencer nodded.

"You're the one who's driving it, right?" I asked.

He suddenly flashed a shit-eating grin at me and shook his head, "Nope. Enya made a few tweaks, I was hoping we'd get to see it in action from the outside before we finish up and install the new core you're helping with. I'd like to see how you handle this baby, Ikki."

"Boot sequence initiated." A mechanical voice came over the robot's head. A faint female Japanese accent.

"W-wait. M-m-me?!" I stammered at Spencer, dumbfounded.

"Don't worry about it," Ann said, coming up to me. "Just go with your guts. If you feel something's off, you can bail out. We'll still learn from the footage, even if you can't make it the whole way down the field."

I felt a tap on my waist, and I looked to my left to see Enya waiting expectantly as she handed me a headset with goggles. Eugene reached into his bag and pulled out a pair of intricate-looking electronic boots as well. Ann smiled and began to run for a nearby hill.

Panic started to set in, but I swallowed it.

"So uh, how's this work? I've read about rescue drones but I've never worked one."

I gulped and took off my shoes to slip into the fancy boots.

"You're not really 'working' it, you're just it for a bit." Enya said. "The whole idea is to get used to the feeling of being inside a golem drone. Once it's up and running, you'll have your consciousness projected inside it."

"Right, right," I nodded. "Like how a Magi Driver controls a combat suit."

"A bit like that," she continued. "The boots you have on will help put power into the legs and will give you a sense of the weight of the robot, but electric signals from your brain will simply be forwarded like radio waves. The headset is similar to a VR visor. It's a bit simpler, but it'll help you get a sense of the environment around you."

"Alright, sounds easy enough." I shrugged as I slipped on the gloves.

"You ready to go, Ikki?" Eugene asked. "Well, I definitely thought it would be fitting that a guy named Ikazuchi would show up as we were working on this."

I looked at him, then back at the robot.

"I guess so, yeah."

"Alright. Let's give her a spin. Squeeze your hands five times and hold on the last time if you feel the need to eject."

"Project Raiju executed —— All systems nominal." the mechanical voice said. "Please authenticate the pilot, administrator."

I looked at Spencer, startled.

"Umn?" I asked.

Spencer shook his head, smiling, "Let's go with... Registering pilot callsign: Designation 'Sparky'"

"Sparky authorized. Commencing system check."

"You named me Sparky?" I asked incredulously

He shrugged, "Hey, I'm trying to fit the theme. Why not?"

I felt a tingle coming from my equipment, and the robot's arms and legs moved, rapidly clicking as it did. It raised itself and then rotated left and right as its limbs moved, testing the joints. Everything was automated, and it looked fluid, almost as if a human was doing the movements.

"System check complete," its voice said. "Please proceed with the activation sequence."

Taking a second to calm my nerves, I put the headset over my head. The drone's body lit up in electrical light and began pulsing with its own rhythm.

"You sure you're ready?" Spencer asked, smirking.

I gritted my teeth and nodded, "L-let's do this."

"Surge forth." Ivan lazily drawled from his position on the ground.

"Surge forth!" the team chorused geekily around me.

"Activation password confirmed. Initiating."

"Alright, this is a bad idea." I murmured to myself. I closed my eyes and tried to get comfortable. The shoes on my feet were starting to feel heavy.

I gasped as I felt myself drop into the robot. It was a feeling that I was being submerged in something. It was a surreal experience — I could still feel my physical body, but it was like someone had slapped a pause button on it.

"Spencer, radio check," Ann's voice came over the headset. "Sohrab, Nia, and I are monitoring from the hill over there, we can see you guys."

Sohrab hadn't been at the club the day I visited, but apparently, he was a core member like Spencer.

I looked around, and my feet felt like they were sinking into the earth slightly. I now saw through the eyes of the robot. The world was completely different. The grass and the field were laid out before me. It felt like its eyes were my own; everything was magnified to pinpoint perfection.

"This is incredible. I feel like I could hear a pin drop on the other side of this hill," I commented.

"This is pretty special technology," I heard Enya in my head. "A lot of organizations were using it for search and rescue, and Spencer came up with the idea to turn the current rescue drones into a golem. Anyway — go to town. Just try to create as much movement as you can. Try a sprint across the field."

I looked down, feeling myself move as if their legs were mine. I took a few more steps forward, and with each step, I could feel the ground moving below me. I looked down at my feet, half expecting to see my shoes, but instead, I was in a whole Kamen Rider getup.

Then, I hopped in place for a second, creating a few shockwaves that I felt in my own body, and tried to run. The drone picked up speed fast; before I knew it, I was speeding down the field more quickly than I expected. The club members around me all let out a whoop as I accelerated to the speed of a car.

"Do you see that?!" Eugene cried out excitedly.

Suddenly, the robot's body started to feel heavier and heavier. My legs began to buckle, and I fell down to one knee.

"Sparky?" Ann's voice came over the headset. "Mission Control to Sparky. Are you alright?"

"I'm, fine," I struggled to stand back up. "This feels heavy for some reason."

"You okay over there?" Spencer asked, concern rising in his voice. "Need to abort, Sparky?!"

"Not yet, what's the plan?"

"Well, seeing how much strain you're under, I was wondering if you could try to jump."

I gritted my teeth and grunted, raising myself and getting a feel for the new weight. I took a few steps and then jumped, propelled into the sky by my suit body, sailing twenty feet into the air.

"Go, Sparky!" I could hear Sohrab cheering. "Go, go, go!"

I opened my eyes, and I could see the entire ground, the whole field, and the orientation of everything was completely different. I slammed down hard, and the suit shook for a second. I felt the impact, but it didn't hurt.

"I think I got the hang of this," I said, my voice echoing from the headset. I stood up and took a few more steps to get a feel for it. My body felt a lot more responsive than I thought it was, and I was able to move a lot more smoother than anticipated. Still, there was a tiny but noticeable latency from when I tried to move to the actual action.

I could see why these things were usually relegated to search and rescue. They could deal with zombies easily, but the real scary monsters would chew through them like paper. There were specialized combat units for deployment in Chaos Events, after all.

"Alright, Spencer, what should I do next?"

I saw Ann and Sohrab cheering us on from the hill, and Eugene raised his arms in victory.

"Jump up that rock face, Sparky. Try and scale it," Spencer ordered.

"Okay, give me a second."

My legs sank slightly into the ground, and I ran faster toward the rock face. I coiled my legs and jumped at the rock face. Although I consciously knew I was safe across the field, this felt incredibly real, and my heart was pounding in my chest.

I looked down, seeing the entire world spread out before me. I felt myself plummeting, faster and faster and faster, down short of the cliff ahead. I flinched hard as the ground approached me.

The drone slammed unceremoniously down to the ground, and I felt a shock throughout my body. I stumbled as I suddenly snapped back into my body — the filtered lens of my visor was gone, and I was suddenly thrown back into reality. The force was much more than I was prepared for, and I fell to the floor nearly face-first as my head spun with vertigo.

"You alright, man?" Eugene asked, kneeling down to check on me.

"I'm okay," I mumbled. "I don't think I liked the landing, though. What happened?"

"Weak connectivity," Enya answered, scribbling in a notebook. "Not bad for a MK IV. prototype, though. Not bad at all. Good shit, everyone."

I looked up and saw all the club members huddled around me, dusting me off. Ann, Nia, and Sohrab were walking down from the top of the hill, smiling.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" Eugene asked. "You're going to be okay."

He looked across the field at the drone, now collapsed on the ground in a ragdoll-like heap.

"Now, we should get that back to the school," Eugene said, staring at it. "That was SO cool!"

"I think it would be better to let Sparky breathe for a minute, first," Spencer said, laughing.

I coughed, spitting out a blade of grass, and smiled at him. "Yeah... I think that I can agree with that."