Reincarnated as the God of Shitty Life Counseling for Defective Washed Up Waifus

Consultation 74.



Ehem. Ehem. Pay no attention to the spoiler in the chapter.

Consultation 74.

“God, how do I make all the slimy mortgage brokers, profiteering investors, and lying lawyers involved in the corrupt housing market across the globe suffer the most?”

“That’s quite an oddly specific request. What made you want to make these people suffer exactly?”

“They’re all shitty lying scumbags who deserve to suffer a fate worse than death.”

“What happened exactly?”

“It’s a bit of a long story, is that okay?”

“Sure, I guess.”

Having said that, she began to recount her stupidly long story.

Spoiler

Once we'd finally caught up to her present situation she concluded, “And that is why I want to make each and every one of them suffer. But not just them, every single one of the filthy rotting profiteers in this goddamn world making a living off the back of us slaving away at the bottom deserve the same fate. Not a single one of them despite showing we’re capable of keeping up with these high interest payments were willing to refinance at a lower interest rate. NONE OF THEM! FUCKING NONE OF THEM! Killing them would be too fucking easy for them. They should experience the hell known as the bottom of the debt trap they like to push us slaves into!”

Slightly taken aback by her outburst, I awkwardly chimed in, “Well… I understand where you’re coming from. Even as a God in heaven it’s not that easy. I can certainly sympathize with you as one of the Gods at the bottom rungs in heaven.”

“I don’t need your sympathy. I just want a way to bring these scumbags to ruins.”

“I see… but before that, there’s something I wanted to verify.”

“What is it?”

“How exactly did you book a consultation with me if you’re this broke?”

“I bribed the Goddess of Reception with a sandwich.”

“A sandwich?”

“Yes, a sandwich.”

‘Just how much did they cut her paycheck that she can now be bribed by a bloody sandwich of all things! Are my consultations a joke to her!” I fumed in rage over my loss in daily revenue. 

Wait, now that I think about it, she probably has a grudge against me, right? I did get her paycheck cut. Rather than it being for the sandwich, she probably just wanted to dig into my pockets. Ugh, it’s a real pain knowing I won’t make a cent off of this consultation.

“Haaaaaah. If you didn’t pay your fair share, I really shouldn’t be giving you any advice… however... since I’ve already spent all this time listening to your story… just this once I’ll make an exception.”

“Thank you, God.”

“If you want to make them suffer, the best thing you can do is affect their ability to do business. Simply put, you only need to attack their livelihood and damage their credibility.”

“You mean by leaving a bad review? That’s nowhere near a satisfying answer.”

“No, a single bad review wouldn’t do shit. However, what you can do is make it so it is impossible for them to do business.”

“Oh, and how would I do that?”

“First, DDOS and take down their websites. This isn’t too difficult to achieve for a smaller business.”

“Second, use a call flooder to take down their phone lines. If they can’t receive any calls, they won’t be able to get new clients unless they change the number. But to change the number means to pay a price to market that new number locally which can be costly. If they change their number, you can obviously get access to it and use the call flooder to take those new numbers down. You can use spoofing software to change the number it appears you are calling from so they can’t do shit to block the numbers calling in.”

“Third, you can flood their emails with spam from disposable email addresses. Essentially you’ll  overload their email servers and bring it down so they can’t send or receive any emails to communicate with clients.”

“Fourth, rather than simply leaving one review for them, leave many negative reviews under different accounts. Saying things like you can never get through to them or how you spent hours waiting on the phone only to be hung up on. You can make these accounts review other things as well to make them all the accounts look legit. When people see this sort of recurring trend they’ll reconsider contacting them. This will greatly affect their business and make them bleed money.”

“If it goes on for long enough, they’ll really suffer the same sort of pain being strapped for cash. They could even be pushed to the brink of bankruptcy if they are harassed to such a degree.”

“I see. It certainly does seem possible to make them suffer losses this way. As long as I use a dynamic VPN in countries that don’t keep logs it should be possible to pull it off. I might still eventually get caught, but what do I even care? Do they think they’ll get any more money out of me? Hah! Over my dead body. If they come to me seeking compensation for damages, I’ll laugh in their faces and slit my throat in front of them as I burn the place down so they can salvage nothing from the property. As for the lender, good luck getting your investment back after the place is burnt to the ground. Insurance sure isn’t going to cover it.”

“Don’t you think you should reconsider doing that?”

“Reconsider? Fuck reconsidering. I’m through with their bullshit. They’re the ones who picked the fight so I’ll do everything I can to drag them down on my way out.”

Before she left, I explained a few other underhanded methods to further increase their suffering. Things such as targeting their family and friends. Making them lose their jobs by spreading lies and rumors online in local groups to give them a bad reputation among the community. There were many things that could be done to accomplish her objective, but I only went over some of them. Honestly, ruining someone’s livelihood and making them suffer mental anguish these days wasn’t anything difficult. With the internet and social media around, and enough knowledge on how to not get caught, it just required a bit of creativity.


Tip: You can use left, right, A and D keyboard keys to browse between chapters.