That Time I Got Reincarnate As A Medic In The World Of Warhammer 40k

Lilith stared at the vaulted ceiling, barely visible in the dim glow of the night lanterns. Shadows danced across the stonework, cast by the flickering flames of votive candles that burned eternally before a towering statue of the Emperor. His unseeing eyes gazed down upon the children, promising protection and demanding devotion in equal measure.

As exhaustion finally began to claim her, Lilith's mind drifted. The harsh reality of her surroundings blurred, and she found herself slipping into a dream—a window into a life that now felt as distant and unreachable as the stars beyond Armageddon's war-torn skies.

In her slumber, Lilith was Maverick Lopez once more. The familiar surroundings of his—her—room materialized around her. Posters of obscure bands adorned the walls, their edges curling slightly with age. A cluttered desk sat in the corner, littered with half-finished sketches and dog-eared books. The soft glow of a computer screen bathed the room in a comforting blue light.

Maverick sat on the bed, phone in hand, thumb hovering over the screen. A text from a friend glowed accusingly: "Hey, we're all heading to the mall. You in?"

The familiar anxiety crept in, a tightness in her chest that made each breath a conscious effort. Maverick's fingers moved almost of their own accord, muscle memory from countless similar exchanges: "Sorry, not feeling great. Maybe next time."

The lie came easily, a well-worn shield against the overwhelming prospect of social interaction. As soon as the message sent, a mixture of relief and guilt washed over her. Relief at avoiding the crowd, the noise, the expectation to be someone she wasn't. Guilt at pushing away people who genuinely cared.

The scene shifted, and Lilith found herself—as Maverick—standing before a full-length mirror. But the reflection that gazed back was not the teenager she expected. Instead, she saw her current self: a young girl with haunted eyes, dressed in the drab, patched clothing of the orphanage. The juxtaposition was jarring; her mind was Maverick's, full of memories and experiences of a different life, but her physical form remained that of Lilith.

She reached out, her small hand meeting the cold glass. The reflection mimicked her movement, but it felt wrong, alien. This wasn't her body, wasn't her life. And yet, it was. The realization sent a shudder through her, a visceral reminder of the irreversible change she had undergone.

The dream reflects the fragments of Maverick's life flashing by in a dizzying array. Lilith experienced them as if they were happening in real-time, each memory as vivid and emotionally charged as the moment it had first occurred.

She was at a family gathering, the buzz of conversation washing over her like white noise. Relatives laughed and chatted animatedly, sharing stories and inside jokes. But Maverick stood apart, a silent observer on the periphery of her own family. The disconnect was palpable, a chasm between her and the people who were supposed to be closest to her.

"Maverick, honey, why don't you join the conversation?" Her mother's voice cut through the noise, concern evident in her tone. The weight of expectation in those words was almost tangible.

Maverick plastered on a smile, one that didn't quite reach her eyes. "Of course, Mom," she replied, moving to join a group of cousins. As she engaged in small talk, Lilith felt the familiar discomfort of pretending, of going through motions that felt alien and exhausting. Every laugh, every nod, every response was carefully calculated to appear normal, to meet the expectations of those around her.

The scene dissolved, reforming into Maverick's room once more. She sat at her computer, tears streaming down her face as she watched a news report about a natural disaster on the other side of the world. The images of suffering and loss tore at her heart, igniting a fierce empathy that threatened to overwhelm her.

Without thinking, Maverick navigated to a donation page, emptying her meager savings to help people she would never meet. The action brought a momentary sense of purpose, a feeling of connection to the wider world.

But as quickly as it had come, the feeling faded. The emptiness crept back in, a numbness that muffled the world around her. Maverick stared at the screen, the images of devastation still playing, but now they felt distant, unreal. The intensity of emotion just moments ago made the contrast of this detachment all the clearer.

Lilith watched as Maverick went through the motions of her day, feeling like a passenger in her own body. The apathy was suffocating, turning even the simplest tasks into herculean efforts. Getting out of bed, attending classes, responding to texts—each action required a conscious decision, a battle against the part of her that simply wanted to cease existing.

Yet, even in the depths of this emotional void, there were moments of intense feeling. A kind word from a teacher could bring tears to her eyes. The plight of a stray animal could consume her thoughts for days. The duality was maddening—feeling everything and nothing, often within the span of hours.

The dreamscape shifted once more, and Lilith found herself in Maverick's high school. The hallways were a noise of slamming lockers, squeaking sneakers, and overlapping conversations. Maverick navigated through the crowd, head down, trying to make herself as small and unnoticeable as possible.

A group of her classmates approached, faces friendly and inviting. "Hey, Mav! We're thinking of starting a study group for the big history test. Want to join?"

Maverick felt a flutter of genuine interest, a desire to connect. But almost immediately, the familiar anxiety reared its head. What if she said something stupid? What if they realized how weird she was? What if—

"Thanks," she heard herself say, the words coming out automatically, rehearsed. "But I've got a lot going on. Maybe another time."

The disappointment on their faces was evident, but they nodded understandingly. As they walked away, Maverick felt the familiar mix of relief and regret. She had protected herself from potential discomfort, yes, but at what cost?

As the dream began to fade, the scenes from Maverick's life became more fragmented, flickering like images on a malfunctioning screen. Lilith caught glimpses of solitary walks in the park, of late nights spent losing herself in books and games, of quiet moments of connection with her parents that were all too rare.

The last image was of Maverick staring out of her bedroom window, watching the world go by. There was a longing in her eyes, a desire to be part of something larger than herself, to connect, to belong. But alongside that longing was fear—fear of rejection, of failure, of the unknown.

Lilith's consciousness slowly returned to her present reality. The harsh truth of her situation came crashing down upon her with the weight of a Titan's footfall. She was no longer Maverick Lopez, the introverted, complex individual with a life of relative comfort and safety. She was Lilith, an orphan on a war-torn planet in a dystopian future that made even Maverick's darkest days seem idyllic by comparison.

The lingering emotions from the dream mixed with the grim reality of her surroundings, creating a maelstrom of conflict within her. For the first time since her arrival in this new world, Lilith found herself questioning whether life was still worth living. The thought crept in, insidious and tempting: perhaps if she ended this life, she would wake up back in Maverick's body, back in a world that, despite its challenges, was infinitely more bearable than this nightmare.

But as these dark thoughts swirled in her mind, an overwhelming wave of sadness washed over her. Tears welled up in her eyes, spilling silently onto her pillow. The realization hit her with the force of a bolt round: even if this was a dream, even if there was a chance to "wake up," she couldn't bring herself to give up. Something within her, perhaps a remnant of Maverick's complexity or a new strength born from her trials in this world, refused to let go.

Lilith curled into herself, her small body shaking with silent sobs. She mourned for Maverick, for the life unlived, for the connections unmade. She mourned for the family she would never see again, for the simple comforts she had taken for granted. But most of all, she mourned for the person she used to be—flawed, struggling, but with a future full of possibilities.

As the intensity of her grief began to subside, Lilith became aware of a change within herself. The memories of Maverick's life, which had been so vivid in her dream, began to feel more distant, less immediate. They were still there, a part of her, but they no longer felt like her present reality. Instead, they settled into her mind like old photographs, cherished but fading, relics of a life that was irrevocably past.

Lilith realized that she had been clinging to Maverick's identity, using it as a shield against the harsh realities of her new existence. But that shield was an illusion. Maverick was gone, as surely as if she had died. And in a way, she had. The person Lilith had been no longer existed, except in her memories. This realization, painful as it was, brought with it a strange sense of liberation. Lilith thought that it is weird to feel that way but somehow she can’t deny it.

The sound of Sister Mercy's bell echoed through the orphanage, signaling the start of another day. Lilith wiped her eyes, took a deep breath, and slowly sat up. She began to dress in her threadbare clothes.

Lilith looked around at the other children stirring in their cots. Many of them had faces pinched with hunger, eyes dulled by hardship. In that moment, she felt a surge of the old empathy that had so often overwhelmed her old self.

As she stepped out of the sleeping area, ready to face another grueling day in the Emperor's orphanage. Maverick Lopez was gone, a ghost of what was. But Lilith—orphan of Armageddon, child of the Imperium—was just beginning her story.

The next day is filled with rhythmic thud of feet hitting packed earth filled the air, punctuated by the occasional grunt of exertion or bark of instruction from the overseeing drill-adept. Lilith's lungs burned as she struggled to keep pace with the other children during their morning run. Her legs, still unaccustomed to the rigorous physical training demanded by the orphanage, felt like leaden weights.

As she rounded the final corner of the training yard, Lilith caught sight of Sister Mercy standing near the finish line, her face a mask of serene encouragement. The sight gave Lilith a final burst of energy, and she managed to cross the line without falling too far behind the others.

"Well done, children," Sister Mercy's voice carried over the sound of labored breathing. "The Emperor smiles upon those who push their limits. Now, go and prepare yourselves for the day's lessons."

As the other children began to disperse, Lilith remained rooted to the spot, her chest heaving as she fought to catch her breath. She stared at her hands, small and dirty, with scrapes and calluses that hadn't been there mere weeks ago. A sudden, overwhelming urge to see herself—to truly see the body she now inhabited—washed over her.

"Sister Mercy," Lilith called out, her voice raspy from exertion. The nun turned, her eyebrow raised in silent question. "Is there... is there a mirror I could use?"

Sister Mercy's expression softened, a hint of understanding flickering in her eyes. "Of course, child. Come with me."

Lilith followed the nun through the winding corridors of the orphanage, past rooms filled with the drone of lessons and the clatter of machinery. They eventually came to a small, out-of-the-way chamber that seemed to serve as a rudimentary infirmary.

"Here," Sister Mercy said, gesturing to a small, slightly tarnished mirror hanging on the wall. "Take all the time you need, Lilith. I'll be outside when you're finished."

As the door closed behind Sister Mercy, Lilith found herself alone with her reflection for the first time since arriving in this world. She approached the mirror slowly, almost reverently, as if it were a holy relic rather than a simple looking glass.

The face that stared back at her was both familiar and utterly foreign. Gone was the teenage visage of Maverick Lopez. In its place was the countenance of a young girl, no more than seven or eight years old.

Lilith leaned in closer, studying every detail of her new face with an intensity that bordered on desperation. Her eyes, large and expressive, were a deep, stormy gray—like the skies of Armageddon before a rad-storm. They seemed too old for her young face, filled with a weariness and understanding that no child should possess.

Her nose was small and slightly upturned, dusted with a smattering of pale freckles that stood out against her fair skin. Her cheeks, once round with childish softness, were beginning to hollow slightly, a testament to the sparse rations and hard work of orphanage life.

Lilith's hair, a rich auburn that seemed to capture the light even in the dim room, hung in lank, unwashed strands around her face. She reached up to touch it, marveling at how different it felt from Maverick's short, dark locks.

Her lips were thin and pale, the bottom one bearing the marks of frequent worrying—a habit she hadn't realized she'd developed in this new life. As she watched, those lips trembled slightly, and Lilith realized she was on the verge of tears.

She stepped back, taking in her full appearance. The body reflected in the mirror was small, almost fragile-looking. Lilith could count her ribs through the thin, sweat-soaked shirt she wore. Her arms and legs, while showing the first signs of muscle from the constant physical training, were still stick-thin, lacking the healthy plumpness of a well-fed child.

A wave of vertigo washed over her as the full impact of her transformation hit home. This wasn't just a new body; it was a new life, a new identity thrust upon her without warning or explanation. She placed a hand against the cool surface of the mirror, watching as her reflection did the same. The hand she saw was small, the fingers delicate and tapered, but already bearing the calluses of hard work.

"Who are you?" Lilith whispered to her reflection, her voice barely audible. "Who am I?"

As the words left her lips, Lilith felt something shift within her. The memories of Maverick's life, which had been a constant, aching presence since her arrival, seemed to settle. They were still there, a part of her, but no longer dominated her thoughts. Instead, they felt like a foundation, a base of knowledge and experience upon which she could build her new life.

Lilith took a deep breath, then another. She smoothed down her unruly hair as best she could and straightened her shabby clothes. The girl in the mirror mimicked her actions, and for the first time, Lilith felt truly connected to her reflection. This was her now, for better or worse, and she would make the most of it.

With a final, determined nod to herself, Lilith turned away from the mirror and walked to the door. She paused with her hand on the handle, gathering her courage, then stepped out into the corridor.

Sister Mercy was waiting, her face a mask of patient curiosity. "Did you find what you were looking for, child?" she asked, her voice gentle.

Lilith looked up at the nun, seeing her with new eyes. Sister Mercy's face was lined with age and care, but there was a strength there, a resilience that Lilith hadn't fully appreciated before.

"I think I did, Sister," Lilith replied. Then, gathering her courage, she pressed on. "Sister Mercy, I was wondering... are there any books about medicine that I could read?"

Sister Mercy's eyebrows rose in surprise, but a warm smile quickly spread across her features. It was a small thing, barely more than a slight upturn of her lips, but it transformed her entire countenance.

"Of course, child," Sister Mercy said, her voice filled with quiet approval. "It gladdens my heart to see you so eager to learn. Come, let us visit the library and find some suitable texts for you."

Lilith felt a surge of excitement course through her, so intense it was almost painful. She followed Sister Mercy through the winding corridors of the orphanage, her mind awhirl with possibilities. Learning about medicine wouldn't be easy—nothing in this world was—but it was a start. A way to make a difference, to carve out a purpose for herself in this harsh new reality.

The orphanage library was a small, dimly lit room filled with the musty scent of old parchment and leather bindings. Sister Mercy led Lilith to a section near the back, where rows of thick, imposing tomes lined the shelves.

"These are our basic medical texts," Sister Mercy explained, running her finger along the spines of the books. "They're quite advanced, but I believe you're up to the challenge, Lilith. Here, let's start with this one."

She pulled out a hefty volume titled "Fundamentals of Imperial Field Medicine" and handed it to Lilith. The book was almost comically large in the girl's small hands, but Lilith clutched it to her chest as if it were the most precious thing in the world.

Over the next few weeks, a new routine emerged. After her daily lessons and chores, Lilith would retreat to a quiet corner of the library with her medical tome. Sister Mercy would often join her, offering guidance and explanations for the more complex concepts.

"Sister Mercy," Lilith asked one evening, her brow furrowed in concentration, "what's the difference between an antiseptic and a disinfectant?"

The nun smiled, pleased by the question. "An excellent inquiry, child. You see, while both are used to prevent infection, they work in different ways..."

As Sister Mercy explained, Lilith listened intently, her grey eyes wide with fascination. The nun couldn't help but marvel at the child's dedication and quick understanding. There was something special about this girl, a maturity and determination that set her apart.

Days turned into weeks, and weeks into months. Lilith devoured book after book, her knowledge growing by leaps and bounds. She learned about human anatomy, common diseases of the Imperium, basic surgical techniques, and the properties of various medicinal herbs and compounds.

"Sister Mercy," Lilith asked one day, looking up from a particularly gruesome illustration of battlefield wounds, "why do some wounds fester while others heal cleanly?"

The question led to a long discussion about infection, immune responses, and the importance of proper wound care. Sister Mercy found herself increasingly impressed by the depth and insight of Lilith's questions.

Throughout it all, Sister Mercy remained a constant source of support and knowledge, always ready with an explanation or a word of encouragement. Yet, she never spoke of Lilith's future or what her growing medical knowledge might lead to. The focus remained firmly on the present, on each day's learning and growth.

As Lilith's understanding of medicine grew, so too did her confidence. The timid, uncertain girl who had arrived at the orphanage was slowly being replaced by someone more assured, more purposeful. She still struggled with the physical demands of orphanage life, her body remaining small, and frail compared to many of her peers. But there was a new strength in her eyes, a determination that went beyond mere physical prowess.

One evening, as they finished another study session, Sister Mercy closed the book they had been reading and looked at Lilith with a gentle smile.

"You've come so far, child," she said, her voice warm with pride. "Your dedication does you credit. Remember, knowledge is a gift from the Emperor. Use it wisely, and always in His service."

Lilith nodded solemnly; her small face serious. "I will, Sister. Thank you for all your help."

As Lilith made her way back to the orphanage that night, her mind was awhirl with all she had learned. She thought back to her reflection in the mirror, to the small, fragile-looking girl with the determined eyes. That girl had made a promise, both to herself and to the universe at large. She would survive. She would thrive. She would find out why she had been brought to this world, and if possible, find a way back home.