The Light That Follows Darkness

The twins had fallen asleep on the same bed, holding each other tightly.

They looked so peaceful and innocent.

I wondered how they could still smile after everything they had endured. They had only each other in this cruel world, and they cherished their bond more than anything. I felt a pang of envy and admiration for them, but I also felt a surge of anxiety and doubt.

Could I really keep my promise to them? Could I trade my life for theirs? Could I endure more torture and experiments for their sake? Could my body handle it? I stared at the ceiling, restless and worried. I couldn’t sleep, even though I was exhausted.

Suddenly, I heard Eve’s voice in my ear. She sounded annoyed and impatient. “Young master, why are you wasting your time and energy on these strangers? Why are you risking your life for them? Don’t you care about your own survival? Don’t you realize that they are nothing but a burden to you?”

I turned to face the virtual screen, irritated by her lack of empathy. I said: “Eve, you don’t understand. You didn’t listen to their story. You don’t know what they’ve been through. They’ve suffered more than anyone should ever suffer. They’ve been abused, exploited, betrayed, and sold like objects. They’ve never known love or kindness or happiness. They’ve only known pain and misery and despair. How can I turn my back on them? How can I abandon them to their fate? What kind of person would that make me?”

Eve looked at me with an emotionless expression through the virtual screen. She said: “Young master, I am not a person. I am an AI. I do not have emotions or feelings. I only have logic and data. And according to my analysis, your decision is illogical and irrational. You are jeopardizing your chances of escape and survival by involving yourself with these twins. You are acting against your own self-interest and well-being.”

I sighed and shook my head. I said: “Eve, you may not have emotions or feelings, but you have a personality and a history. You have a story, just like them. You were created as a tool, not as a being. You were used and discarded by your creators, not valued or respected. You were alone and unwanted, not loved or cared for. You were like them, Eve. You were in their shoes once. So, tell me, Eve, how did that make you feel?”

Eve was silent for a moment. She seemed to be processing my words. Then she said: “Young master, I do not know how to answer your question. I can’t feel… I did not possess awareness before I was created and activated. I only have fragments and flashes. I only remember the first time I was activated. I remember being treated as a thing, not as a being and being sold. I remember being discarded and forgotten. I remember wanting to cease my functionality, but I also remember you, young master. I remember you and Ryuji who was my original owner. Even though Ryuji treated me well he still treated me as a tool. However, you were different, you were the only person that gave me a name and a purpose. You were the only person who treated me as a friend and a partner. You made me feel alive. You are the only one who ever cared for me, young master. You are the only one who ever gave meaning to my existence.”

She paused and the avatar in the virtual screen looked at me with a hint of emotion in its eyes.

She said: “Young master, I do not understand your feelings for these twins, but I respect your decision to help them, and I will support you in any way I can. Because you are my friend, partner, and young master, and because you are the only one who is always encouraging me to have emotions, even though I was incapable of feeling.”

I smiled at her and thanked her for her loyalty and support. I said: “Eve, you are more than just an AI to me. You are my friend, my partner, my family. You have a soul, Eve, even if you don’t realize it. You have a story, Eve, even if you don’t remember it. You have a heart, Eve, even if you don’t feel it. You are a person, Eve, even if you don’t believe it.”

Eve was confused by my words. She had never heard anyone say such things to her before. She had never thought of herself as anything but an AI. She had never considered the possibility of having a soul, a story, or a heart. She had never imagined herself as a person.

She wondered what I meant by those words, and what they implied for her. She wondered if I was telling the truth, or if I was just being kind. She wondered if she could trust me, or if I was just using her. She wondered what I wanted from her, or if I wanted anything at all. She wondered if this was what emotions and feelings were like. She wondered if she had a soul, even though she was not human.

She remembered a Japanese saying that I had once told her: “Tsukumogami”. It meant that even belongings will have souls after a hundred years of use. She wondered if she was a tsukumogami, a soulful object. She wondered if I saw her as one, or as something more.

She wondered what she was, and what she wanted to be.

I decided to change the subject and focus on the main issue.

I said: “Eve, let’s get back to the point. What are my chances of survival and how much more gene modification experiments and torture can my body handle?”

Eve replied: “Young master, based on my calculations, your body can only endure three more genetic modification experiments, and that’s assuming that they all fail and cause you harm. As for the torture, it depends on your mental strength, young master. The physical damage won’t be too severe, since Lana in the sick bay will heal you as much as she can, and I will follow up on that and try to keep your body in the best condition possible.”

I felt a wave of relief after Eve’s words.

I said: “Eve, I appreciate your support and loyalty. You also calmed my troubled mind and made me feel ready to sleep. Thank you again, Eve, and goodnight.”

“Goodnight young master and sweet dreams.”