The Nature of Predators

Memory Transcription Subject: Taylor Trench, Human Colonist

Date [standardized human time]: February 9, 2161

Earth. The Blue Marble in the viewport brought tears to my eyes, seeing the birthplace of my species in person. There were many conflicting emotions that whipped around my head, jockeying for control. I’d spent so many long nights mourning the loss of our civilization, and here it sat, stronger than ever. When the United Nations passed along my parents’ present whereabouts, it had been Gress who insisted that I came back. I didn’t belong here, even if the Terran government was permitting it. After two decades had passed since my family sent me off, the prospect of seeing them was overwhelming. It would be unbearable if they…spit in my face, had moved on, or…

Mom and Dad sent me away for nothing. I remember their last words—I’d sit replaying them as a reason to carry on, a tribute to their memories. They wanted me to be happy, and I sure as shit wasn’t, except for the brief span where Gress was my refuge. They said they’d be proud of me no matter what, but they didn’t see what I’ve done. What if that’s not true?

Strolling out of the spaceport smack dab in the middle of the Las Vegas Strip was sensory overload. The neon lights that flashed on towering buildings, the fountains that jetted up into the air, the grandiose hotels and casinos: so distinctly flashy and human. While Paris might’ve been destroyed in the bombing, preventing me from ever seeing the attraction that Gress had shown to me in virtual reality, there was a glowing Eiffel Tower that rose into the sky. Even the palm trees were a marvel from someone who didn’t remember a whisper of anything tropical, and had seen only the rocky walls of a cavern. The warmer temperatures didn’t bother me, since I was used to walking out on Tellus’ dunes dressed in concealment gear; that had been hot.

One thought stood out above all the rest, as I looked around at very curious passersby. I had never seen this many humans in my life. The United Nations’ diplomatic staff on the SC station paled in comparison to the tourists coming here to live it up. I could see billboards and advertisements for glamorous shows and entertainment, and teared up even further. This was unimaginable to have at my fingertips, in a place where performances and art had been written off in general. The kori dancing classes with Gress had been the lone expressive display I’d ever done just for fun. Speaking of the Krev, it was fortunate that he was basking in Terrans’ attention, since he was the first of his kind to visit Earth.

“Do they really call this Sin City?” Gress shouted at the onlookers. “It’s just like primates to want to get into trouble. I have to see some of this mischief, don’t—Taylor, what’s wrong?”

“It’s t-too much.” I squeezed my eyes shut, as the Krev cupped my chin and turned it toward him. I’m glad it’s just me and him. He’s the one person I’d trust with anything. “All these years, my home thrived without me. Our culture is so beautiful…”

“And so are you. Humanity’s spirit wasn’t stomped out, and you can live life at a hundred percent now. I don’t want you to feel tied down. You’ve always wished you could have your home, and you should be happy, Taylor. You should be able to breathe in the fresh air and look at the same sky that’s always looked down on your people.”

I startled. “What? I don’t want to come back here. This humanity’s spirit might not have been shattered, but mine was. I’m damaged goods, nothing but pain and regret. They don’t get me, and they shouldn’t have to.”

“I’m haunted by people that tried to hurt me in the past, and my own failures, just as much as you are. You’re not nothing but that, Taylor. You weren’t free to be who you really were, and you had to hide all the aspects that make you the beautiful man I love. I like you much better when you’re not a faceless, closed-off body under a mask—when you set aside that fear and hurt. There’s nothing anyone has to ‘get’ but that.”

“What do I even tell my parents about my life? What do I say, just walking through the fucking front door after twenty years? I can’t do this.”

“Yes, you can. I’m not letting you turn away now. I struggle every day with not saying goodbye to Lecca, and not knowing when I’ll see her again. Your parents have been feeling that for twenty years—you have been without them for years. If they love you, they will support you and embrace you with open arms.”

“I’m not fucking ready, Gress.”

“Fine. Then we’ll walk around the Las Vegas Strip until you are. I bet your casinos are so cute!”

I gave the Krev an exasperated look. “Literally how could a gambling hub be cute?”

“Primates find a way. Let me look inside one, and I’ll tell you.”

Gress curled his claws into the back of my hand and dragged me, not leaving me much choice in the matter. A place where humans went to wager money on games of chance—to think that had quantified as ruin before aliens came around—brought a sardonic smile to my face. I felt self-conscious as security and staff gawked at us, though there were no explicit orders barring Krev and ark colonists from the premises. I noticed there was an ample number of alien tourists mixed in with the crowd, and wondered what the herbivores had thought of predatory games of chance. Was it our hunters’ drive for domination that made blackjack value face cards, with binocular-eyed beasts sketched onto them, worth more than numbers?

Clubs and spades are both symbols of leaves, very prey-like suits, while gemstones and hearts don’t seem that predatory either. However, I know how the Federation thinks. Disregard all evidence that they don’t like. Gress, on the other hand…

Gress gawked at the blackjack tables, watching. “Aw, that’s so adorable—saying ‘hit me’ to draw more cards! It’s so violent, making cards into a form of playfighting.”

“Imagine what the Venlil over there thinks of that,” I grumbled, pointing a finger at a fluffy guest at the table. “Probably thought the dealer was going to strike the guy, and flinched when they said the words themselves.”

“I don’t see how anyone can find you scary. Smigli casinos would be so much better with primate dealers; Krev would gamble forever!”

“Hang on. The Smiglis have card games?”

“Do they ever! Those wiggly, pink shits have debauchery much more covered than your Sin City.”

The Venlil at the table hissed at a human server, after sipping a colorful drink brought for him. “I was told that there were complimentary drinks, but this is just juice. Juice! Do you know who I am?”

“We do, General Kam; you’re a regular. They…warn us when you’re here, you know,” the server replied.

“Then why do you give me this fruity shit?”

“If you don’t want it, I’ll take it,” I volunteered, until the Venlil shot me a blistering look. I coughed awkwardly. “Or not.”

“Paws off, interloper. What hole did you crawl out of?” Ouch. That hits close to home. “The only place this needs to be taken is back to the bar, to be filled with real spirits!”

The server sighed. “Alcohol won’t bring back the glory days, sir.”

The old Venlil shot a potent glare at the waiter, who relented beneath that withering look.

“The drink has moonshine in it,” the human said. “You just can’t taste it beneath the fruit juice. Just please, try not to bother the other patrons with rants about Veln? We’ve had…complaints.”

“There’s moonshine in this? Shit, why didn’t you lead with that? Bring me another!” Kam declared.

I closed my eyes to run through our history with the Venlil, before blinking them open. “Gress, I think that’s the military general who wanted to shoot down Noah and Sara’s ship.”

“What?!” the Krev hissed.

“Yeah. He came around to us being trustworthy, scared off Sovlin, and later helped with convincing the public. I…didn’t expect to see him chugging moonshine cocktails at a Vegas blackjack table.”

“It doesn’t seem like Kam is worried about phrases like ‘hit me.’ The staff seem more worried about Kam striking them.”

“Bro has one hell of a death glare. I drew his attention by trying to swipe his drink, so…I think we should move on.”

“Gladly.”

The two of us strolled past rows of slot machines, where a subspecies of furless primates called “tourists” happily tugged at levers to try to spin three matching symbols. Gress got melty-eyes after seeing fruit symbols, perhaps imagining us sitting on a forest floor chomping real predator foods like strawberries. We really were terrifying and apex, huh? The Krev loved the hordes of humans milling about down the aisles and crowding each game, though I was suffering from the disorienting lights and sounds. It was all I could do to keep up with his enthusiasms, gushing over every game. He pointed with a claw toward the roulette wheel, eyes gleaming.

“Look at the humans spin that big wheel! They’re all watching it with such fixation. Juvre would love to have one of these as a toy,” Gress fawned.

I narrowed my eyes. “Your obor would want a segmented wheel with colors and shapes, to bet over where a marble lands?”

“No, but he’d like spinning it round and round. Everything you do is so adorable!” The Krev had taken off to the next game, with a level of hyperactivity I didn’t know he had. The scaly alien was having a lot more enthusiasm for visiting Earth than me; it was going to be disastrous if his kind ever got to visit here en masse. “And then look over here—you throw dice inside this precious table with green felt! It’s in its own little basin.”

“That’s craps, Gress. It’s literally just throwing dice inside a table.”

The Krev bounded off with relentless enthusiasm, and I rolled my eyes. “Look over here! The humans keeping their cards to themselves like some big secret, and putting down cute, tiny circles like they’re trying to scare each other. Sizing their rivals up all serious and studying their expressions: you look so grumpy when you play competitive games! I love it!”

“Is there anything we do that you take seriously? If these exact actions were taken by a species that weren’t furless primates, would you feel the same?”

“No, but just look at those furtive glances toward their cards. Like scared, skittish obors: that’s what you looked like when you took off the mask. I wanted to scoop you up and—”

“Gress. You used to try to take us seriously and treat us like sapients. What has gotten into you?”

The Krev’s tongue flitted out. “Who, me? I’m definitely not trying to voice my unfiltered thoughts so that you’ll get annoyed, and I can prod you over to your parents.”

“So that is what you really think of Terran culture.”

“This is a genuine struggle, Taylor. You have sketches of primates in fancy fabrics on your cards, blinking lights and sound effects on machines, drinks in precious saucers that look like upside-down umbrellas—”

“Those are called martini glasses.”

“Humans even use fruit slices and skewers to decorate those drinks! You get my point. Love what I point out or hate it, you should enjoy all those little things too. I’m trying to help in a roundabout way, by bringing them to your attention.”

“It is something to see humans going about their lives, and all of the intricacies that are uniquely ours—not just out of reach on the screen. Seeing you like a kid in a candy shop, it’s adorable. The enthusiasm is both fucking annoying and highly contagious at the same time.”

“Exactly! Earth isn’t some scary, foreign place; you can find ways to have fun here. You don’t need to be away from home a second longer. It’s a lot to take in, but you will acclimate in time. I’ll be here the whole time. We just need you to take the hard first steps, and you can have everything you ever dreamed of. Everything the Federation stole from you.”

I nodded, sucking in a deep breath. “I’m just scared of what my parents will think of me…of how I’ve turned out.”

“And I think they’ll be happy to see that you’re okay; everything else won’t matter. Please, Taylor. Trust me. I want what’s best for you, and I won’t let you stumble into any more regrets.”

“There’s nothing I wouldn’t trust you with. What’s best for me is you. Maybe I…can do this with you beside me.”

“You can and will do this. Let’s go.”

Letting a much more reserved, reverent Gress usher me back out of the casino, I thought about the Terrans—the predators—here playing goofy games of chance. It was trivial and airy, compared to the concerns that weighed me down. I wasn’t sure how I felt being back on Earth, a planet as foreign to me as Avor. After coming this far, however, I couldn’t miss my chance to reunite with my parents for fear of rejection. There was a deep-rooted pain in my soul over being sent away to Tellus, and growing up without family or affection. I’d spent so much of my life alone, desperate for anyone’s approval, while becoming a bitter and short-sighted man.

It wasn’t a wound that I could deny the existence of forever. The Krev was right that I shouldn’t hide any longer from the society and loved ones I’d dreamed of decades.