Weeaboo's Unfortunate Isekai: The Necromancer's Gacha

I froze. The numbers sprinted through my head. Five orders, then it’s night and the battle starts on its own timer. I have used two orders- one to have the Judith's clear trees and make cut boards, one to have Rache go explore.

I needed at least one, and probably several, orders to improve defenses around the Tower before tonight’s battle. This was it. Number Three. The record stopped here. I had the existing defenses, and whatever improvements I could make out of the fresh cut wood. I have more combat effectives than previous Tower Masters… probably… though almost all of them are One Star. Was it enough by itself? Or did I need a trap card?

There is only one real answer to that question.

“How long do expeditions take?” I looked over to Versai.

“Like I said, it takes multiple days to clear, but you can do it in pieces. One at the minimum, shortest possible expedition, barely gets you past the gate but you can get a feel for the ruin. Three is the longest I saw someone try. You don’t find much with one, but it’s pretty safe. We all died when we tried Three.”

“Sounds like you went pretty deep.”

“Yes, although that one was kind of odd to me. The places are usually cities, or a university or a church or something like that. This was a stretch of desert.”

“Eh? Rad scorpions got you?”

“I don’t know what those are, but no. We just got horribly sick and died.”

“Died… how?” I tilted my head. “Wait, how do Awakened Souls even get sick? You don’t have organs or, for that matter, blood. Right?”

“We aren’t that close yet.”

Huh. Interesting. She went kind of glassy when she said that. Must be gated behind the relationship system.

“I don’t know how else to describe it, other than we got sick. Everyone got dizzy, started shivering and shaking, then fell on the ground. I remember the sand was like glass. Big pieces of it. Hard and smooth.”

“Sorry, the sand was like glass? As in, it was in big solid pieces?”

“I know it sounds crazy but-”

“I know how you died.” I shook my head. These missions just shot WAY up the danger curve.

“Really?”

“I’m guessing the words ‘Gamma radiation’ don’t mean much.”

“Nope.” She shook her head, the silken perfection of her blond hair tracing her confusion through the unworthy air.

“A special kind of curse. You only found that in one place?” Fingers crossed.

“Yes, the Tower Master decided to gamble three actions on the investigation, and we marched deep into the desert. Perhaps there was something in those buildings and bunkers we passed, but he was adamant that the good stuff would be deeper in.”

“Hokay! One time unit it is. Any restriction on who can go?”

“Not that I know.”

I had used two units. One for the expedition, then two for defenses. This worked. And I frankly would trade my pinky toes for the chance to be somewhere not-this-tower, even if it was White Sands.

Wait… it couldn’t actually be White Sands, could it? It’s got to be some in-universe thing, right?

Great God Pachinko, bless me today. May my hands be always gold and never cack. Please make this a raid on the National Iridescent Clarion Crystal repository, still full of Six Starred waifus waiting for me. Please and thank you.

I called up the expedition screen. There was a new field- Team Lead. My picture was in it.

Well. I assume that’s me. I had never seen the face before.

“Is there…” I tried to think if there was a mirror or something, anything, in the tower that I could look into, try and see my face. This wasn’t just my old body made strong, this was an entirely new face. A new face! They put me in a doll body! They put me in a DOLL BODY! What the-

I shivered.

“Whoa, sorry, lost my train of thought there. Okay, I can take up to five people. Let’s go with… Versai, Rache, Kim, and… Versai, how much fighting goes on in these raids?”

“Variable. From none to constant.”

Damn. Hmm. Tough one. Couldn’t bring Radz, she was useless at short range. I didn’t want to bring the Mikas, as they had shields but were slow. The Judiths were obvious choices, but to give them two fifths of my slots? And when you get right down to it, the only person I could bring that could stand and fight was Versai. Rache clearly needed speed to do any damage at all. Literally any.

I sighed. Split the baby? Sure, why not. I added Mika to the list and it didn’t change the expedition time. Thank heaven for small mercies, etc. Neither did Judith.

“Launch expedition!”

There was a blur and a lurch and suddenly it was night and we were trapped in a burning street.

“Form up on me! Judith, stand right next to me and don’t move around without orders. Versai, front and center. Mika, you cover our back. Kim, on my other side. Buff our fighters. Rache, you see any enemies?”

Kim smiled and twirled her wand across her fingers. Little crescents of fire started trailing the wand tips.

“Free running, boss. Looks like easy riding.”

I took a more careful look. We were on cobblestones. Some torn out of the ground, most in good condition. We were in a dense urban area. Not to sound like a snob, but it was very “Generic ‘What The Japanese Think Medieval Europe Looked Like’ aesthetic.” I can’t critique- I actually liked the look. It just felt low effort. Apparently someone agreed, because the buildings next to us were all on fire. All the buildings, the whole length of the street, were burning down. I could smell the smoke, feel the heat, I could hear the fire roar and crackle. And yet, looking closely-

“Am I going crazy, or is nothing actually burning?”

Kim cast her spell, and everyone’s weapons glowed an unsubtle red. “It is burning, and it isn’t.” Kim said.

“Kim’s right. I can see where it’s charred, and I can see things that are ashes, but nothing appears to be burning right this minute. But I don’t think it’s an illusion. Some kind of strange magic?” Versai suggested. I didn’t have a better idea.

“Kim, can you do anything about the fire?”

“Mmm. I’m not sure. With your permission, I will try to suppress a small bit of it.”

I mentally circled the words “A bit,” but nodded. “Go for it.”

Kim spun her wand, fingers flicking the slim stick over and over, fast enough that it looked like a propeller spinning flames. There was a moment of rising smoke and fire- then the flames burst apart. We had a tunnel into the building.

Support mages were moving straight up my favorite lists. Still not as high as the Judiths, but getting there.

“It won’t stay open long!”

“In, in!”

We rushed through the gap and through the door. Into what, I’m not sure. There was a long bar made of some dark, polished wood at one end of the room. There were small tables dotted around the room, each with two, or at most four, chairs around them. The floors were wide boards, way wider than anything I was used to seeing in a modern house. There were… I’m guessing oil lamps… on the walls. Painted on the ceiling was a wild garden of blue roses. The blue rose motif was echoed on the table tops, and behind the bar.

The bar looked empty- all the bottles off the shelf or smashed. Chairs had been kicked over, tables shoved around, broken glasses and bottles on the ground. People got out fast, but it looks like no one died, and they managed to empty the bar first. Or was it empty already? Maybe they were drinking the last of it when they ran?

“Eyes up everyone. Rache, search the room.”

“Chromed lightning.” She nodded. It was interesting to see her work. She seemed to walk normally, but, somehow, it was far faster than a human should have been able to move at a walking pace. Her hands blurred as they gently sorted through broken glass. Her wooden heeled boots didn’t thump or clack as she checked behind the bar, lifted rugs, and tested the knobs on the doors.

Versai was keeping her eyes moving around the room, but I could see her head tilting up again and again.

“Versai?”

“It’s the Blue Roses.” She murmured. “I don’t want to talk about it. It’s not a threat.”

“Memories?”

“Don’t want to talk about it.”

I shrugged.

“Rache?”

“Tumbleweeds, boss. Two doors- one through the back, one off to the side.”

I nodded. It wouldn’t be an expedition if we found treasure in the first room. “Check the side room. Mika, Versai, cover her.”

She nodded and walked over, pulling it open. They got set around the door. Rache yanked it open, then darted back.

There was a tense moment waiting. Then another. Nothing.

Rache eased her way over, carefully checking as she went. Eventually she slipped into the room. A couple of minutes later-

“It’s all clear.”

I walked over and took a look. Supply closet. Didn’t look like there was food or drink in there. I could see where crates had been dragged out. “Judith, anything in there worth taking?”

“Not that would be worth the hauling.”

“To the back door then. Leave this one open to show that we searched it. That’s the rule now- closed door means the room hasn’t been checked or searched. Open door means it has. No opening a door unless it’s to search the room. Got it?”

There was general agreement with this. We trooped back over to the other door, formed up, and Rache popped it open. I saw her body tense just before she smashed backwards into Versai’s shield.

Versai swore and shoved her away, trying to reset. An enormous man, seven feet at the shoulder came barreling into the room. His height had to be measured at the shoulder, he had no head, no shirt, and talons where his feet should be. Didn’t seem to slow him down any. A fist the size of a bunch of bananas came pounding down at Versai. She barely got her shield up in time to deflect it.

Rache was on her feet again, slashing uselessly with her saber. I could see it now- she was making contact, but the blade had all the force of a swung feather. Just a One Star. This was why. ALL she can do is scout, and do high speed melee attacks.

“Rache, go to the back of the room, then make a running slash! Repeat until he’s dead. Mika, move to support Versai. Kim, buff everyone. Judith, stay back here with me. Versai- Kill him!”

Kim spun her wand, and the little flicks of flame darted out, landing on everyone’s weapons. There was a heavy thunk as Mika planted her shield down. The dolly was smarter than I thought- she angled it to cut off the room to the monster’s left side. Boxing him in a little. Keeping him away from the civilians behind her.

There was a heavy twang, and a blazing white bolt lodged in the monster’s chest. Little licks of flame danced up from it, still burning. Sizzling the flesh around the wound. It was eerie- there were no roars or bellows. All the noise was on our side. It just focused on killing.

Well. It just had to get past Versai first. And Versai wasn’t having it. She hit the monstrous thing like a real Iron Chef- chop, chop, chopping up today’s challenge. A talloned foot came in for a kick- she swayed to one side and hacked the leg open. Fist came sweeping in? It was deflected with the shield, then hacked away at the elbow.

I had insisted on fighting my battles at range- why risk a melee? Versai hadn’t had a chance to show what she could do. Watching the armored embodiment of the phrase “out of your league” dismember a seven foot gigachad inspired some very mixed feelings. Some… definite… well, I don’t need to work out, and my diet is strict these days, but… damn. Positive thoughts, positive thoughts. We are winning this fight.

Versai suddenly went down on one knee, almost dropping her sword. I could see some spell effect swirling around her. Moving bonelessly from behind the enormous man, a second monster appeared.