Well at Least I’m a Magic Pirate Now

Erastus 2

The flaming sky shifted ever darker as the sun sank beneath the waves. Pale, distorted faces peeked out of the monochrome darkness beneath the trees, watching the sunset intently. We all knew that the balance of power would shift soon, when darkness invalidated our range advantage. The dark-blinded members of the crew had their vision reduced to a circle of torchlight around the ship, close enough for the unpracticed hands to get one good shot off before the ghouls would start climbing the hull.

Plugg had objected to Sosima’s intention to hop down onto the sand and hold them off as long as she could manage. He’d been hovering around her since she arrived on the ship, and it was an objectively suicidal strategy. Of course, he did back off when she revealed that she was only a temporarily lucid ghoul in need of reincarnation.

“My dear Captain, it must have slipped your mind.” She said, “Your ship wizard told me that you generously provided his messenger with the seal of Vishgurv when asked on my behalf. Did I misunderstand?”

“Oh, of course.” He said. “It slipped my mind; it is hard to look at you and see a recovering ghoul.”

I smiled and gave him a thumbs up when he turned to glare at me.

What? Is it so hard to believe I'm just being a wingman as a peace offering? 

Rowe and I perched at the bow of the ship, keeping watch for the coming assault. Jaundiced Jape, a yellow skinned half orc, sat at the stern just in case the ghouls tried to flank us by swimming. The three of us were the only people on the crew with darkvision, at least until Narwhal got back from Ivey’s lookout post. Rowe spent more time maintaining a bank of dart traps than she did keeping watch, so it was up to me. I didn’t really have the attention span to silently stare into the darkness for hours at a time, so that meant it was really up to autopilot. I fiddled with the ceramic ball Rowe gave me, lost in thought.

Hundreds of them, and around five of them retain some of their humanity. Enough to be stronger, like Sosima was. If they all attack together with any kind of coordination, most of us will probably die. If the leaders join the assault, we might die. If they surprise us in any way, at least a few people will die. 

Sosima hadn’t had many dealings with the packs, so she didn’t properly know what most of them could do in much detail. She knew at least one necromancer was among them that she’d avoided like the plague due to his ability to dominate other ghouls, and a cleric who could heal their fellow undead. With any luck, they’d wait at least one more night for their minions to wear us down before risking themselves in the field.

The enemy comes. (Perception check vs enemy stealth 19+4=23)

“Incoming!” I yelled, “get in position!”

The horde of ghouls was silent. They rushed out onto the rocky beach in a tidal wave of pale flesh, scrambling across the stones on all fours, and not a single one gave away their position with a warcry. They charged in a single rough line of ravenous predators, spaced out just enough to not get in one another’s way. I used the frozen moment to count the enemy.

Almost forty. Bad but not unmanageable; we have almost that many people and fortifications. If we can hold the line, I think we can take them out. 

I threw the ceramic ball as hard as my slender arms could manage into the center of a throng of ghouls. The liquid inside, alchemist fire seemingly pulled directly out of Rowe’s ass, ignited on contact with the air and clung to almost everything. The burning ghouls went down quickly; the fire made them very visible targets for the crew’s crossbows and Rowe’s shotgun.

It was a promising first round of combat, cutting 40 down to 30 before they reached the proper torchlight, but there were only four still forms laying in the darkness. Six of the burning ghouls just turned tail and ran, and would no doubt bother us again in the future.

Right in front of the bow of the ship, our first line of defense broke the enemy charge. Four individuals standing in a rough arc, chosen for their expendability. Sosima, two air elementals, and a giant fiendish crab summoned by Plugg. The four defenders were quickly engulfed in a sea of claws and teeth as the ghouls rushed to bring them down.

The crab served admirably as a wall of flesh and exoskeleton, but the first time a ghoul managed to make a mark it seized up and collapsed due to the paralytic touch. The ghouls broke through its shell in seconds.

My air elementals stretched and shifted to avoid the ghouls, bobbing through the air as flailing claws reached out to grab them. The elementals, being nothing but congealed clouds of vapor and abstract elemental energy, lacked a nervous system to paralyze. Even so, the wave of ghouls nearly killed one of them; a half dozen ghouls grabbed hold of it at once, ripping off chunks of it like putty. That elemental dispersed, transforming into a whirlwind of diffuse energy in order to flee.

Those things take two spell points to summon and last three days. Much better to have it hang out near Sandara until she has a chance to heal it than die stupidly now.

Her build seemed to revolve around a mechanic called “boasts'' which allowed her to react to her own successes with a follow up of some kind. Generally this took an immediate action, and would allow her to buff herself or make a single weapon attack. She had one talent that allowed her to make boasts as a free action, called Fan Favorite, which triggered any time she succeeded on a saving throw. Further, she had a power called Rippling Boast which could do a small amount of sonic damage to a single enemy any time she boasted. My eyes had glazed over as I read through her sheet; I didn’t quite realize how it would all work together until I saw it in practice.

Ghouls surrounded Sosima within moments, and every time that a ghoul touched her she would make a save vs paralysis. She had a fairly high fortitude save, so she passed every single one. Each successful save would trigger Fan Favorite, and in turn she would use the Bloodthirst boast to make a free action attack with her sword.

Sosima’s sword flashed so quickly that the world seemed to glitch in order to give her more time to attack. Sosima had nearly as much muscle on her nearly six foot frame as Rosie; it was simply more evenly distributed. Half of the attacks missed, as she was fighting defensively, but any hit was sufficient to down her already-injured opponents.

“Fire, you idiots!” Plugg yelled, “don’t just watch!”

Each strike was accompanied by an ear splitting high note, packed with magical energy to batter the surviving ghouls. She seemed to be directing the sound blasts at those who were already severely injured, driving them off with small bursts of 3 damage. Six seconds after the first ghoul made contact with her, Sosima had taken more than 20 points of damage and finished off five ghouls alone.

On my signal, Sandara stepped up and channeled positive energy at the front of the ship. The ghouls were bunched up, nearly all either fighting the disposable bait or trying to navigate past those who were. The burst of phantom grapeshot tore through the ranks of the enemy to less effect than I might have liked, killing none but lightly injuring them all.

Things are looking good. About half of them are dead and the rest are injured. We might make it through this without casualties. Well, other than Sosima. 

The rest of us weren’t idle, of course. Behind me the crew leaned over the railing to fill the ghouls with more crossbow quarrels. Plugg threw a handful of the same fire he’d once used on Sandara, while Caulky downed a ghoul using her revolver. I fired an invisible ray of utter cold myself, leaving a trail of flash frozen vapor in its wake as I froze a ghoul’s body solid. (Touch attack 14+4=18, 12 damage)

_Holy shit, that got a lot more powerful. _

My optimism faded somewhat when an arrow lodged itself into the deck next to me, narrowly missing Sandara. When the turn ended, I looked around, taking stock of the situation.

Shit. Normal ghouls can’t focus long enough to use a bow. The big boys have come out to play, it seems. Worse, he’s firing from outside of my darkvision’s range. I think; maybe Autopilot could see him clear as day, but I’m not wasting a turn on a perception check. Not when I can delegate. 

“Silvanshee, take the elementals and find out who’s shooting us.” I ordered, “Take him down if you can, but don’t risk yourself unnecessarily.”

“Understood,” the cat turned into a stream of vapor and flew out towards the treeline, commanding the air elementals to follow with a loud, tonal whistling.

I wish he’d been willing to give me his name. I’d like to summon this guy again. 

I fired off another blast of frost, creating a hand sized patch of ice in the wet sand next to my target.

Without the air elementals to block them, about half of the ghouls walked right past Sosima and began clambering up the sides of the ship. Rowe’s traps triggered, smashing fist sized hunks of metal into their faces the moment they started climbing.

The other half collapsed upon Sosima, dragging her down and tearing her apart. Two ghouls died with her. The crew cried out in despair as they saw their champion die. It had always been the plan, but that didn’t make it any less gruesome. I didn’t see any of it myself; far better to focus on the swarm of undead monsters and text updates than the mutilated corpse of the woman I’d slept with less than a day ago.

I took about ten minutes for my turn, breathing in and out to center myself. Sosima had spent her borrowed life at a premium; the plan really couldn’t have gone any better. The howling masses that emerged from the trees had been reduced to a bruised and battered six, who were about to climb through a forest of downturned pikes. I glanced out onto the beach again, and saw some of the less stalwart ghouls dragging away the corpses of their fellows.

The boarders, outnumbered ten to one and already injured, were torn apart before they could cause any more damage. I placed one hand on Sandara’s arm when she raised her Jolly Rodger to channel positive energy again.

“Save it.” I cautioned her. “We can’t afford to waste a single cast.”

We’ve repelled the first assault, but there will be more. Plenty of them ran away, and there’s a healer somewhere out there. Can we survive six more waves like this? No. Probably not in quick succession. 

As the last of the ghouls fell, another arrow arced through the sky to pierce Sandara. She staggered, cursing, as it buried itself halfway through her torso. Her doppelgänger, summoned when the first arrow missed, turned to her and examined the wound. It was only an illusion, it couldn’t do anything, but I suppose that lent it credibility.

Sandara has been Sniped for 13 damage. 

“Get down. The archer is aiming for you specifically,” I said, “they probably know what positive energy looks like.”

Send in chaff, try to pick off anyone that proves to be a threat? Why weren’t they shooting Plugg all day, then? 

“Don’t start celebrating too hard.” I called out. “They’ve got a longbow.”

Everyone hit the deck, Sandara healed herself for 8 damage, and I realized how bad the situation potentially was.

Those arrows have a serious chance of taking someone normal down, and the sniper doesn’t seem to have a long delay between shots. That was only one round. 

I checked my log at the start of the next round, and saw that my Silvanshee and two air elementals had closed into melee with something that my log referred to as a Ghoul Ranger after it revealed itself by shooting. The Silvanshee used its Heroic Strength ability, boosting its strength to 10. Not high by any means, but high enough to do a few points of damage with its pounce attack.

The logs weren’t very reassuring. The ghoul was escorted by ten lesser ghouls, who could unleash their full attacks since the elemental was in melee with them at the start of their turns. The Silvanshee, largely in defiance of my orders to avoid risking itself, bore down on the ranger and tore into it with celestial cat claws. He critically hit, twice. The critical hits only did 4 damage each, since the Silvanshee’s housecat body wasn’t well equipped to kill man-sized targets, but that was more than enough.

You did it you crazy holy cat. You might have just saved all our lives. Only problem? You dropped yourself into the middle of a pack of angry ghouls immediately after killing their leader. 

The log stopped immediately after the ghoul’s death. I belatedly realized that it was still my turn despite the ghouls on deck all being dead. I looked out onto the beach, and saw a new set of uninjured ghouls snuffing out the torches and dragging away their dead mates.

“Crossbows! Don’t let them get away.” I ordered, pointing at the ghouls. “The survivors will be back later.”

I briefly considered lighting up the beach with Dancing Lights, but it was more important to remotely dismiss the Silvanshee before it died. I felt much more responsible for the borrowed lives of celestials than I did for demons or animalistic elementals.

A barrage of missiles scythed through the undead in the dim moonlight. More shots missed than hit, but the occasional lucky score was enough to deter the ghouls even if it wasted ammo. I hoped, desperately, that the ranger had been the only greater ghoul present.

Hopefully that guy's death causes a delay while they figure out what to do next. If they attack again, the fighting will be mostly on the deck.

“My elementals have destroyed this pack’s leader.” I called to the crew. “I don’t think we will face another assault that large tonight, but the rest of his pack might still come to visit when they realize they might lose their chance at us. Stay alert. I’ll tell you if anything is coming. Rowe, set up more traps.”

The men listened to me because my orders made sense, and I knew the situation. Plugg, for all his official authority, was just as blind as the rest of them. He seethed with rage, likely turning over a dozen ways to kill me in his head. He wouldn’t kill me here, when I was helping to preserve his life, but the moment that his own life was secure I was dead. (Sense motive 20+2=critical success)

“Conchobar, go check on the patch job.” I called. “If we can shove off, even for a few hours at a time, that’d be lovely.”

••••••••••

We weren’t so lucky. If we went out to sea in our current state, we’d need all hands on deck just to stay afloat from hour to hour. On the other hand, we had a nice long period of tense but peaceful waiting. In fact, after the initial assault our next news was good news.

“Hail!” Sosima called from the stern. “Would you be so good as to lend me a rope, and perhaps a coat?”

The woman who climbed over the rear railing of the ship was recognizable as Sosima, and she was a sight for sore eyes. The men of the crew were particularly appreciative of the fact that she hadn’t had any clothes when she reincarnated a mile out to sea. Her fingers and toes were webbed, and her neck now featured gills. She was nearly six feet tall, with long, toned legs.

https://www.patreon.com/posts/lady-sosima-105427020

The men cheered to see the new resident war-goddess return. She had draped her long hair artfully over her breasts, which mostly served to emphasize them. Jaundiced Jape wolf whistled, to the general laughter of the crew. Sosima herself smiled tolerantly at the attention.

“Jape, your grog ration is suspended for a week.” Plugg snapped, breaking out of his own appreciative reverie just in time to spoil everyone else’s fun. “We are still in danger, gentlemen.”

Plugg ran up to Sosima, blocking the crew’s view of her body. He wrapped his coat around her shoulders. The coat I had enchanted to make it better armor. It shifted as she put it on, cinching at the waist and constricting her breasts in a way that supported and immobilized them nicely. Her lack of undershirt meant that she was showing a generous amount of cleavage; a happy accident. The coat hung down to her knees, leaving her muscular calves exposed. Cog tossed her the Vindictive spear, and she was fully equipped for battle despite her lack of pants. Her earrings were in my pocket; she didn’t need them right now.

“Glad to see you, Lady Aulamaxa.” I called back, returning to my vigil. “Would you prefer to stay on the ship next time?”

“Why yes, Mr. M’Dair.” She answered, “I believe I would.”

I checked her character sheet, and was pleased to see that she had returned to us at full health. She was as good as new, and Plugg had provided her with some of the best armor available on the ship. There was, however, an unexpected popup on my menu. Missions.

I opened the submenu, and found that Sosima counted as being saved. If she wanted, she could swim away right now and find either an island or a community of sentient aquatic creatures. That was apparently enough. I completed the quest with a smile, gaining two experience points.

Welcome to level 4 everyone. Now we just need to rest, and we will be better than ever. Well… We make it through tonight first, then we come back better than ever. 

•••••••••

The ghouls struck again at midnight, and thankfully this pack didn’t have any more tricks up its collective sleeves. I lit up the night with alchemist fire and dancing lights, and half the enemy scattered before they even reached the ship. Without a leader, the ghouls were operating on animalistic hunger. They wanted to feed, and without guidance they took the most direct path.

The archer would have stopped us from standing around with crossbows ready, but a feint would have been almost as good at this point. Rowe can’t make a ton of these alchemist fires per day. 

Another fiendish crab bravely fell in the line of duty, briefly delaying the ghouls so they could catch a few more bolts. Sandara, Plugg, Rowe, and I retreated to the poop deck near the stern of the ship once the ghouls started climbing, stopping only to fire off a few spells.

The poop deck, where the ship’s wheel was positioned, was one of the most defensible places on the ship. Two narrow staircases led up to the deck, overlooked by a platform just tall enough to make climbing impractical for most.

“Injured below deck!” Plugg yelled. “Scourge, Caulky, Lady, guard the poop deck!”

“Cog, you too!” I added, ordering Cog to take up position next to Caulky on the starboard steps.

That was the plan, at least. Six members of the crew were left behind in the scramble, either paralyzed or merely downed. Most died quickly, and were dragged off the ship. I saw two ghouls wrestling over the corpse of the man who I’d shared a watch with in the crows nest.

I never learned his name. He seemed like a decent guy. 

I wanted to kill those two in his honor, but only half of the ghouls let themselves get distracted. My frost blasts were far better spent on the ones climbing the stairs or trying to scramble up onto the deck directly.

You couldn’t save them. Focus on the ones who are still alive. 

Sandara spent her last channel, peppering the assembled mass of ghouls once more with divine energy. After that, she was relegated to knocking over ghouls with torrents of water and spot healing the four people holding the stairs. Whenever the defenders were paralyzed, two men would drag them away until their bodies regained sensation. Plugg and I would focus fire on that side of the ship for a few rounds to ease the pressure, sometimes including a crab stepping in as a substitute.

The whole battle was over in less than three minutes. A single round in boxing. It felt like eternity, and I suppose it was longer for me. Every six seconds, the world paused to let me take in the horror and wrack my brain for some kind of clever ploy that would never come. I’d used all my tools already. Frost Blast. Pass turn.

Our enemy’s hunger worked in our favor. By the time the enemy was done squabbling over our dead, eating or splitting up my coworkers directly in front of me, the ones that stayed on task were a pile of corpses. The crossbows came out, and we finished the job.

“I need to sleep, or at least meditate.” I said as silence fell across the ship. “I won’t be much good to you all as I am, but I can call another set of outsiders if I can rest first. Sandara, you too.”

I spoke with more confidence and authority than I really had. Then again, nobody tried to stop me. I walked down to the infirmary, wracking Autopilot’s mind for level four outsiders I could summon first thing in the morning. I was thankful that even if I was still hopped up on adrenaline, Autopilot could fall asleep immediately.

Besmara, if you’re listening, I swear I’ll be the best damn pirate I can be if nothing happens in the next six hours. 

••••••••••

It’ll be a bit before they all actually rest and reach level 4, but I have posted everyone’s character sheets.

https://www.patreon.com/posts/level-4-party-106989182

A reminder that I have a patreon, and if you feel so inclined I do also post polls there semi regularly which do not require payment to vote on. Occasionally you’ll lack context, but you can always vote.