NOVEL SIMPLE Chapter 8
Chapter 8
A young man in a hoodie appeared in the school supermarket. He lowered his head and most of his face was hidden under the brim of his hat, so that only a pair of eyes was exposed.
The cashier stared the suspicious-looking man from the moment he entered the door, for fear that he would do something against the school rules. Seeing that this person was looking around from side to side and wasn’t picking up any goods for a long time, the clerk felt their suspicion was more and more accurate.
“Cough, you have that, don’t you?”
Seeing this man had come to the checkout counter, the clerk’s heart was tight. Could it be that he was not stealing, but was robbing?
“What is that?” he asked cautiously and without much kindness.
The hooded man looked nervously around: “It’s Durex, JissBon6, or something.”
Clerk: “…Classmate, this is the school supermarket, what do you want?”
Ling Meng bowed his head, scowling; he now knew that he had been tricked by Mang God.
He stepped out of the supermarket, pulled out his phone, and navigated in Weibo’s private messages to Mang God.
Lemon: You played me, school supermarkets don’t carry condoms!
Mangosteen: Did I say to go to the school supermarket to buy them?
Ling Meng: …
He carefully thought about the dialogue between the two of them. It seemed that Mang God really didn’t mention the phrase.
Made him stupid!
“MengMeng, MengMeng!” someone called him very loudly from the upper level of the opposite dormitory. Ling Meng looked up. Who else would it be but his silly roommate?
“MengMeng!” The whole dormitory area could hear his loud roommate. “Have you bought them yet? Are they ribbed or lubricated?”
Ling Meng: …
Made him really stupid!
When the people in the building heard the noise, they curiously came to the window and looked down. Picturing Mang God behind one of the windows, Ling Lemon raised his hands in anger and gave his roommate a pair of middle fingers.
Anyway, with his face7 now gone, Ling Meng rushed to the adult store outside the university to buy a box of condoms. With his home page in the background on his monitor, he took a photo of the Durex box in his hand and posted it on Weibo.
@Lemon: The penalty of the bet @Mangosteen [share the picture]
Mang God quickly forwarded it.
@Mangosteen: Hand Play Year8 //Lemon: The penalty of the bet @Mangosteen [share the picture]
The following comments are surprisingly unified, with a theme skewed towards Mang God’s forwarding message.
— It’s a pity not to see Mang God’s face, but it’s worth it to see Lemon Dad’s hand.
— Please take the box away from the lens please, no one wants to see it.
— Asking Lemon Dad’s opponent to open a real life broadcast.
— It’s a pity that such a beautiful hand has to fight in the Galaxy, it should be saved for jerking off9.
The topic had long been so twisted that no one cared about what thing Ling Meng had gambled the face of his college career on. His Weibo fans rose a lot in the night. Single dog Ling Meng threw the Durex into the deepest part of his drawer, that money could basically be seen as funds to buy powder.
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Footnotes:
1. hanging open (开挂): to open plug-in, specifically to cheat in a game; can be used to express awe at another’s achievements (a compliment) ↩
2. the real body of god (真身): the fundamental form of a god beneath the human appearance ↩
3. JB: acronym for ji ba (雞巴), aka penis ↩
4. jiayou (加油): “adding fuel”, slang for cheering someone on, like the Korean “fighting!” ↩
5. eat S: please substitute whatever gross thing you can imagine starting with S ↩
6. JissBon: a Chinese condom brand named after James Bond, please say it out loud to figure out why ↩
7.face: his pride/reputation ↩
8. Hand Play Year (手玩年): gaming saying for “these two hands, I could play for a year to express my affection”, used when someone sees beautiful hands ↩
9. 灰机: ash machine/airplane/soaring high, slang for jerking off really well ↩
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Our ML is so snarky and clever ❤