NOVEL SIMPLE Chapter 22: The Noble Lady is Funny.
(Celia’s POV)
Saren: “You’re just trying to frighten me, aren’t you? I refuse to believe this…” She said with a tone of disbelief.
Celia: “I don’t really care if you do believe it, Saren. I also do not need your help, so don’t think that I am trying to trick you for more benefits.” I reply with a shrug.
Perhaps she saw that I was still hungry, Remi, Saren’s maid, had snapped her fingers, and another plate of food showed up for me to feast upon. While the noble girl was lost in thought, the broken glass was cleaned up while I kept eating.
Saren: “What is the point… So many will die, with just one Will and universe surviving?” She said, biting her nail.
Remi: “My Lady, please do not bite your nails. If you must, then bite mine.” She pleaded.
Saren: “…”
Celia: “The point? Why do you think that even is one? Even to me, my best guess is that this game is just for fun. Only those in their private universes, or those living in the universe known as Home, are safe from it.” I explain.
With more grim words, the noblewoman was at a loss once more. I didn’t really mind, as I had more food to tend to. I hadn’t maxed out my Hunger Stat just yet, after all.
Saren: “Fuck…” She swore.
Remi: “My Lady, language.” She scolded.
Saren: “…Remi, is now really the time to care about such things?” She said with a slightly annoyed tone.
Remi: “Lady Celia, how do you get your wives to calm down or behave?” She asked while looking at me.
Celia: “Huh? I usually console them or give them kisses. And if all else fails, I just have sex with them. I do the same for my daughters. Not the sex part, though!” I answer after thinking over it a bit.
Remi: “And, in your opinion, how shall I calm Saren down?” She replied.
Celia: “Don’t you know the answer to that?” I reply with a raised eyebrow.
Saren: “You have daughters? But… aren’t you a lesbian?” She said, overriding her maid’s question.
Celia: “…They’re all adopted.” I say with a sigh.
Saren: “Oh…” She said with a disinterested tone.
Huh, this woman is a little odd…
Celia: “Are you two dating?” I ask with a curious tone.
Saren: “…”
Remi: “I have caressed every inch of her body countless times, my fingers have also entered her sex just as many times… But we aren’t officially dating.” She answered in her mistresses stead.
Celia: “Why not?” I reply with a head tilt.
Saren: “Mother would never allow it.” She said with a sad tone.
Celia: “With your power, why care what your disapproving mother thinks?” I ask with a raised eyebrow.
Saren: “It isn’t the simple, Celia. To inherit the family, I must marry a man. Even if I was willing to give up my inheritance, mother won’t let me be free to do as I please.” She answered.
Celia: “Oh, does conception magic not exist in this dimension? If it did, then there wouldn’t be any problems with you two being together, so it must not exist here.” I reply.
Remi: “Conception magic? Lady Celia… might you be able to teach us this magic?” She said, practically pleading.
I might not be a Supreme Goddess anymore, but my domain was still here with me in spirit. I don’t know how I haven’t come across a dimension like this before, though… Is the Will of our universe a lesbian, or someone who really likes them? Oops… maybe I have to rethink offing her a bit.
Celia: “Sure. But I need to get stronger first, as I don’t have access to any magic at all right now.” I agree.
Saren: “You’re so willing to agree? I didn’t expect that in the least… I honestly thought that you would barter with us on this knowledge…” She said with a surprised tone.
Remi: “We’re more than willing to pay you for this magic, Lady Celia. We aren’t the only lesbian couple in our kingdom, and we would love it if women didn’t have to be forced to marry only males.” She added after her mistress finished speaking.
Celia: “No payment needed. My Domain is Lesbian Love. As such, I love all women, especially lesbians. This love isn’t always sexual, mind you. In fact, it is mostly friendly love. If there is an obstacle to your lesbian relationship, then I feel that it is partly my duty to remove said obstacle.” I reply with a smile.
Remi: “Hm… maybe it is more than just fate that we met you, Lady Celia.” She said with a smile of her own.
Saren was also happy, but refused to express it. I understand, though. Remi is hopeful that I can help them get married, while Saren is the type that doesn’t like to get her hopes up until everything is said and done.
Remi: “Now, back to my previous question. How should I console Saren? I ask this, as you truly seem like a woman who understands people’s hearts.” She asked once more.
Celia: “That girl seems like a brat, so you should pleasure her until she can’t walk for the next few days.” I answer before taking another bite of food.
Saren: “Brat!?” She said, standing up after slamming the table.
Celia: “Yes, a brat.” I repeat.
Saren: “…”
With a red face, the girl sat back down and started to pout. My words didn’t hit a swore spot, Saren just wasn’t able to refute my claims of her being a brat.
Remi: “Though she is bratty, I still love her. But her swearing and rudeness has gotten us into so much trouble over the years…” She said with a sigh.
Celia: “How do you two have sex?” I ask.
Saren: “I… We won’t answer that…” Her words were cut off.
Remi: “I tend to dominate her completely, asking her to be as silent as she can be. I do love her moans, but I feel like letting her freely express them will bite us in the butt, eventually.” She said with a remorseful tone.
Celia: “You’re abusing your wife, so stop doing that. Instead, you must let her fully express herself. She acts out because you restrict her. If you let her swear and moan as she pleases while you sex her, then she’ll behave herself.” I say with a confident tone, refocusing on my food.
Remi: “…”
Saren: “…”
The maid was shocked that she hadn’t realized that she was abusing her wife, while Saren was red in the face, as my words were clearly the truth of the matter. While I ate, the two apologized to each other. This matter wasn’t that big, in my opinion. Like with most mortal couples, they have a communication problem.
It was something that they should work on, and I was fine with being their relationship counselor. After all, I was hoping to mooch off of them for a decent while. I might as well give them as much benefits as I can. But that is for another day. For now, I will focus on this food!