Dog of War

They raised an eyebrow, curious. "Oh?" They still felt a bit raw from the... incident just a moment ago. 

 

Miss Verdun procured a berry- dark, purple, alien in appearance and as big as could be comfortably eaten in one bite. Did she just have this on her? They examined it. "It's not drugged, is it?"

 

"No, but it is delicious." Miss Verdun smiled.

 

The notion of a treat that was a literal treat was demeaning, but it smelled enticing, and they very much wanted additional emotional distance from the earlier unpleasantness. They cautiously took it from her hand, and rolled it over in their own for a moment before popping it in their mouth and biting down.

 

It wasn't just good. The juice and flavor that flooded their mouth was far and away the best thing they had ever experienced. They savored every second they could, paying no mind to the suite of embarrassing noises they were making. Sweet and a little tangy, almost overwhelmingly delicious, it was nothing short of utterly superb! They swallowed it down all too soon, and began to miss it before the aftertaste even left. 

 

"Absolutely adorable," Miss Verdun cooed, "Would you like another?"

 

There was little they wanted more, but they couldn't ask for a treat, could they? They had to maintain some level of dignity. Surely an independent sophont was capable of restraint. "Thank you, but I think I'll refrain for now." 

 

Miss Verdun seemed a bit disappointed at first, but that quickly gave way to her signature warm smile, "You really a delight, you know. I'm glad you are feeling better."

 

Something inside them fluttered, "R-Right. Just... don't put things that beep like that on me again." 

 

Miss Verdun held up a hand like she was taking an oath, her smile never faltering. "I swear it, little one. Your comfort means everything to me, you know." 

 

That weird feeling fluttered again. They swallowed it down. "Do you think I can get back on the couch?"

 

"Of course," Miss Verdun lowered her arm, placing it back by her side, "but you know, I would like you to think of the guest room as your room, and a place you can relax."

 

Ugh, right. "All it has is a bed, it's hardly anything resembling a personal space. Even the few things I have are kept in the living room."

 

"Then why don't you look at some things that will make it a personal space? Furniture, decorations, whatever you want. In the meantime we can move your stuff in there."

 

It would be bad if they got too comfortable here, but they also needed to show that they could be comfortable.... It was shaping up to be a rather delicate balancing act. "Wouldn't that be troublesome when it comes time to leave?"

 

Miss Verdun shook her head. "Not at all, it would be a simple matter to replicate it in your own hab. We can even detach the room and move it if you wish." 

 

Well, they were out of excuses at least. They sighed. "I'll give it a look. For now I would like to get on the couch, I'm still a little off-balance from all that class E." 

 

They could feel Miss Verdun perk up. "We're a bit aways from the couch, petal, did you want me to carry you?" 

 

We're never getting on anything on our own for the next month, are we?

 

Maybe they could find some furniture that was normal Terran sized? But right now, if they tried to walk they'd likely stumble or fall. This was a moment where they clearly needed help, and likely another test. "If you don't mind."

 

Vines gently lifted them up until they rested in Miss Verdun's arms, a place they were growing familiar with despite their best efforts. It was still strange to be carried like this, but it was fine, as long as they knew it was coming. There was another, quieter feeling underneath, but they didn't get time to try to assess it before Miss Verdun set them in the nook of the couch. "Okay, I'll let you have some space now. Just remember, you can always ask for help if you need it." 

 

She said that every single time, as though they were going to forget. "Of course, thanks." They gave a small salute. Miss Verdun's frown marked her disapproval, "Sorry, old habit."

 

"It's quite alright little one, I know you are making an effort." Miss Verdun smiled again, "I'll be in my room if you want anything." With that, they were finally alone again. 

 

They let out a sigh of relief. What a harrowing half hour that was. They eyed the offending item- the monitor firmly secured to their wrist. What the hell possessed them to make it beep like- like that. They took a breath and forced the thought out; the last thing they needed was to set it off again. They picked up their pad from where they left it, and brought up a search for some lounging options. 

 

Countless options for couches, cushions, chairs, and more. Almost all were designed to accommodate Affini, or at least would require some Affini assistance to use. That simply wouldn't do for something in their room. After poking around in the settings for a good while, they managed to find an option for 'Sophonts without an Affini,' which filtered it to Terran-sized things. They selected a comfortable-looking chair, a desk to work at, and a couch to lounge on. 

 

That out of the way, they returned to their studies on the Affini language. The syntax was rather simple, the grammar nothing crazy, the alphabet remarkably easy; however certain things were still a bit out of grasp. The Affini seemed to have no less than a hundred words that amounted to 'cute' depending on the exact nature of what they found adorable. There was one for the way a sophont enjoyed a meal, and another for the way they smiled. Each had modifiers for if that sophont was a floret. Even the word xeno itself seemed to directly translate to pet, floret merely indicated that they were an owned pet. 

 

There was also a lack of actual practice. Reading out the phonetics of a language and being able to match it to a definition was one thing, but if they intended to avoid being talked over they would need to understand it in conversation. Asking Miss Verdun for help was an option, but not one they were keen on. They were already around her far too often. Perhaps they could find something like an audiobook? That way they could not only get in their practice, but learn more about Affini culture.

 

Every single book they found involved ownership to some degree. Whether it was mourning the loss of a pet, courting a pet, or taking care of a pet, florets were everywhere. Even the ones about two or more Affini romancing each other had a focus on their florets! Between this and the earlier conversations in the public chat, it really seemed like the Affini didn't value independence at all. 

 

We may be in trouble. We should still be looking for a way out. 

 

That was certain domestication. If they somehow ended up on Cassius, maybe they could have a chance, but there was no way to escape the Vervarium . This was... well it wasn't fine, but they would make do. They just had to prove themselves. They did need a place to start, however, and each of these stories seemed as good as the next. 

 

A few lists of recommendations later, they had a clear choice- The Stars Betwixt . An ancient Affini novel about two beeple, their respective owners, and the romance between them. Hailed as a hallmark of Affini culture. There were countless readings available, some solo, some with different individuals reading each part. They hit ‘sort by popularity’ and choose the top option available in the local Affini dialect, opening the novel itself to follow along the best they could. 

 

They were swept away, not just by the astounding level of production that was put into the recording, but the writing as well. It was flowery, poetic and evocative. Or at least, the parts they understood were. It wasn't long before they were able to pick up all of it. 

 

<Dearest friend, surely you can see as well as me.  our mistress and thine are bound not by bonds akin to our own, but are pulled to each other by the gravity of a much stronger ardor. Unseen but felt, as they orbit each other.>

 

<"Let us then help break their equilibrium, so their stasis may end and they may join together at last."> They nearly jumped out of their skin as Miss Verdun spoke alongside the recording, "You know that's a classic, though I'm curious what made you want to read it."

 

"Don't sneak up on me like that!" As they snapped, they saw the monitor flash yellow, and took a few deep breaths to calm down. 

 

"I've been standing in front of you for the last five minutes- you seemed particularly engrossed." Miss Verdun giggled. "It was quite adorable, but it is time for dinner." Had it been that long already? They'd been reading practically the whole day! 

 

They cleared their throat, keeping the engagement from cracking their voice. "I see. In that case, could you help me down?" 

 

"Of course." A moment later, they were set on the floor, the vines retracting slowly to make sure they were steady. The walk to the kitchen was brief. Before they could even ask for further assistance, they were once again picked up with care, and placed in the chair. "I made some lasagna, from scratch this time." 

 

They cut into it with the fork set beside the plate, and offered a "thank you" before they dug in. It was, as food always seemed to be, utterly delicious. It made them hum with delight as they savored every second. Still... They couldn't help but think of the berry, the 'treat' Miss Verdun had given them, and how superior it was in taste. 

 

"You know I didn't realize you were interested in learning Affini." Miss Verdun's voice snapped them out of the spell. "Or reading The Stars Betwixt ."

 

They thought over their response as they finished chewing. "I figured if I'm going to be independent it would help to at least understand the language, if not speak it. Reading words on a page can only do so much, it just seemed the best way to start trying to understand it as used in conversation." 

 

"And you just happened to choose one of the most romantic novels in Affini culture?" Miss Verdun teased. 

 

"It was highly recommended, and you can learn a lot about people by what they consider important." They punctuated the statement by taking another bite. 

 

"And what did you learn?" 

 

They fidgeted with the fork as they answered, "Affini are all incredible saps, and value love and happiness above all else. It seems you all do little else but daydream about romance and taking care of sophonts, which is considered the most important thing an Affini can do. It also seems like you do not value independence in the slightest, and consider it misguided at best."

 

Miss Verdun laughed, a powerful, rich, and wonderful sound. "Yes, that is the Affini alright." She continued to laugh for a few moments, before finally settling down into a smile. "You know I would be more than happy to help you with learning Affini."

 

"I'm sure." They cut into the meal, preparing their next bite, "However what I value is my already limited private time." 

 

The Affini sighed, "If you say so, but the offer stands. I do ask that you share your thoughts on The Stars Betwixt once you finish, though." 

 

"Of course. I've been enjoying it so far." They took they final bite and set their fork aside, leaning back. They wiped their mouth, and paraphrased the text to the best of their ability. "The sweetness of the meal could not compare to the sweetness put within, for naught could compare to your love."

 

That was a mistake. Miss Verdun immediately swept them up off their seat, vines petting and stroking nearly everywhere as she praised them. "Cute, cute, cute! Utterly adorable! Impossibly precious!" There was that thrumming sound they had heard before, almost song-like, now overwhelmingly joyous.

 

"Miss Verdun!" They yelped, "p-put me down!"

 

The Affini instead pressed a vine under their chin, rotating their head towards her face as she continued with the next line. <"And you, my precious pet, deserve every drop that I could give and more."> 

 

It was then they made their second mistake- they met her eyes. Deep, swirling pools of golden light, desire and an alien need glimmering from within. They could feel themselves sinking into them, drowning in them. 

 

No!

 

Through sheer force of will, they forced their eyes shut. "Miss Verdun, please!" Their heart was nearly beating out of their chest as they realized just how much they were at her mercy.

 

"Ah, sorry little one, I got carried away." They could feel themselves being lowered, only cautioning to open their eyes once they felt the ground beneath them. "I know you aren't ready for that." Miss Verdun actually sounded a bit embarrassed about the affair.

 

They straightened out their clothes, taking practiced breaths. "It's... Well it's not fine, but I'll get over it. Don't do that again." 

 

"Of course, but you might be interested in knowing that it translates to nectar, not meal." She tapped a vine to her face, "though I suppose there isn't much difference for a beeple."

 

"I'll keep that in mind," they grumbled, still recovering. "Right now I just wanna bathe so I can go to bed."

 

The AI chimed, "I'll get the bath running for you, cutie!" Great, the machine was just what they wanted to hear right now. 

 

"I'll compile some pajamas and a towel, and meet you there, okay?" Miss Verdun smiled.

 

"Sure," they agreed, and headed to the bathroom. Stripping down was odd, accompanied by a faint queasiness. Yet another unfamiliar feeling as they saw their body below them. A quick glance towards the mirror and they noted it was darkened again. It was as comforting as it was maddening; how could they confirm or deny the feelings without evidence?

 

"Would you like some Class E?" Miss Verdun offered, announcing her presence. How creatures so large were so silent was beyond them.

 

That could help, but a heavy dosage could have her washing them. "Just a little, I do want to be able to wash myself."

 

"Of course." They felt the prick a moment later, and the edge softened soon after.  

 

They sighed in relief. "Thanks." Leaning on Miss Verdun like this was temporary, they reminded themselves. They'd be on their own feet as soon as they found them. "Can I get some help into the tub?"

 

Vines cradled them, taking care to avoid certain areas as they were lifted up, their heart quickening through the Class E. Miss Verdun carefully lowered them into the warm water, the steam clinging tightly to its surface. "There you go, Princess."

 

The word pricked through them like a flechette round. With any luck she didn't notice them blush, "I wish you wouldn't call me that. It feels weird," they protested as they began to bathe.

 

"Weird how?" Miss Verdun prodded. "Could you describe it perhaps?"

 

"No." That would be like describing a color they'd never seen, or a sound they’d never heard. 

 

The Affini made a quizzical intonation. "Do you really not know what you're feeling?" 

 

"No." There were far too many unfamiliar feelings flitting around their head lately. They could hardly pin any particular one down, let alone begin to describe it. They did their best to bury them all as they lathered up the luffa. 

 

Miss Verdun was silent for a while. With their back to her it was impossible to gauge what she was thinking. "Beckett, have you been happy before?"

 

What sort of question was that? "Sure, after I finish a job or polish my boots." 

 

She shook her head, "I don't mean satisfied with your work, I mean actually happy, as in experiencing joy." Isn't that the same thing? What was she even getting at?

 

"I'm afraid I don't understand the difference." They dunked themselves below the water to rinse off the suds, and continued scrubbing off. 

 

They didn't have to look at Miss Verdun to feel the sadness that evoked in her. It permeated through the air, sending a chill down their spine they felt through the warm bath. "I- Oh dear..." She fell silent again, the only sounds in the room was the gentle splashing of water and of the sponge scrubbing away. 

 

They finished washing off in this silence, breaking it to announce they were done. They were promptly lifted out of the water, and placed in front of a small table, a towel and neatly folded pajamas resting on top. Drying off and getting changed didn't take long, and they set the towel back down. 

 

"Ready for bed, cutie?" Miss Verdun smiled, a wistful air still about her. 

 

"Yes Miss." The Affini motioned for them to take the lead, and followed them as they moved into the guest room. Their room? Miss Verdun certainly wished for them to think of it as theirs, but that was a tall order. There had only ever been one place they had ever felt belonged to them. They paused at the side of the bed, "Could you-?"

 

They were picked up and placed in it before they had an opportunity to finish, Miss Verdun pulled the blanket back over them. "Comfortable?"

 

"Yes," they bit back rising anger, "but please let me finish asking next time." She was getting too comfortable doing whatever she pleased. 

 

"Sorry little one, I'll try to keep it in mind." Miss Verdun apologized. "Before I leave, would you like some Class Z? They'll help you sleep."

 

What would they need a sedative for? "I haven't been having trouble getting to sleep." 

 

"It would prevent you from dreaming." 

 

Ah, so that's what it was. "It was one bad dream, it'll be fine."

 

Miss Verdun's vines kneaded over each other, "Are you sure?" 

 

"If it happens again, then sure, but it seems a bit of an overreaction to take a sedative because of one bad dream." A small compromise should assuage her. 

 

"Alright, I'll hold you to that." Miss Verdun moved to leave, pausing at the doorway, "Beckett, one day you will be so happy you won't be able to remember what it was like before, I promise." 

 

"...Goodnight Miss Verdun." 

 

Darkness swallowed the room. 

 

-_-_-_-

 

There was turmoil in her core as Camila cleaned up, joy and sorrow intermingling like oil and water. Beckett wasn't just reading The Stars Betwixt , she had quoted it to her! It had taken no small effort to keep from claiming the little one then and there. Especially once she became lost in her eyes. She also couldn't recognize her own happiness- that had nearly broken Camila. It made sense that Beckett lacked emotional intelligence, but this was severe. How could she make her happy, when she didn't even know that's what she was feeling?

 

Camila was out of her depth. She couldn't give Beckett the help she needed here, but she knew who could. She had been meaning to schedule the little one a visit with a therapist, and after tomorrow she'd actually have the xenodrugs needed. Oh! Cordelia was going to lose her mind over the evening's developments! Camila could hardly wait to tell her that Beckett was reading The Stars Betwixt ! 

 

Taking out her pad, Camila noticed she had two messages from a username she didn't recognize. 

 

[FallCourtScribe]: Hello, this is Viola Amaryllis, 9th bloom, Fae/Faer, I work as an Archeoxenobureaucrat. I have some matters to bring to your attention regarding 'Beckett.'

[FallCourtScribe]: When would you be able to meet?