I’m really not the Saviour! (我唔係救主囖!)

1 – I think you have the wrong person



If you like what you read here, consider checking out my other Tales of the Jade Road: Ginseng and Yew, Eitsu's Nine Lives, and At the Water's Edge which are all set in the same universe (although not necessarily in the same timeframe).

It was a perfectly ordinary day in the country of Sek'suen1石蒜 (sek6 suen3) – a flower, the red spider lily.. Under a clear blue sky, people were going about their business as usual, from the city port of Yuk-hoi2玉海 (yuk6 hoi2) – 'Jade Sea'. to the countryside in the west.

Approximately twenty lei3里 (lei5) – an old unit of measurement, approx 500m. west of the capital, Maau-daan-si4牡丹市 (maau5 daan1 si5) – 'Peony City'., a young man sat on a large stone by the side of the road and contemplated his empty water gourd, his eyelids lowered.

No matter how long he stared at it, it remained empty.

Blank-faced, he tossed the heavy gourd carelessly behind him into the bushes. What was the point of carrying something so heavy if it served no purpose?

He squinted up at the blue sky and thought about his next move. This was a large road, so surely someone would pass by soon and he could try to hitch a lift, or even just ask for some water.

In the meantime, it had been a while since he had given his dou5刀 (dou1) – a single-edged blade, anywhere from a knife size to 1.2m., a single-edged and curved blade as long as his arm, some maintenance. He drew it from its sheath at his side and assessed it. Smeared with dirt and who-knows what, the blade was dull and miserable-looking. At least the grip looked relatively clean, although the unusual jade-coloured hilt and matching scabbard only looked marginally less shabby than the blade. He roughly scrubbed at the metal with fistful of his robe, which only smudged it even more.

He blinked at the results expressionlessly.

This wouldn't do. He stood up and went to put away the sword, but missed the scabbard entirely, his arm flying backwards under the momentum as it failed to sheathe as he expected. Yet the blade did suddenly stop, only a little further back than it should have.

He looked behind him.

A small demon, ridges running down the middle of its face, stood behind him, poised to stab down with a short spear. The young man's sword had gone straight through the demon's sternum.

They both stared at the blade, then looked each other.

Without a single change in expression, he pulled the sword out.

The demon fell down, dead.

"You did it!" a voice exclaimed suddenly.

All at once, a crowd of villagers, some carrying farming implements, popped out from the bushes a little further up the road. Nervous and excited, they crowded around the young man.

"Those two demons have been terrorising us, and travellers along this road, for weeks!"

"We thought you were done for!"

"We didn't know what to do! Lucky you are strong!"

Two demons?

The young man looked behind him, and saw that a clawed hand was protruding out from the bushes. The empty water gourd lay nearby, and when he moved the plants aside to take a look, he saw that his discarded gourd had accurately hit another demon on the head and knocked it out instantly.

"This one is still alive," he said in a low voice. Even when he spoke, he kept his eyelids half-closed, as though sensitive to the afternoon sunlight.

"All the better! Let's tie it up!"

A group of villagers, made brave by their numbers, surged forward, clamouring, to grab the unconscious demon. They led it away with shouts and cheers.

A young girl shyly pulled at the young man's sleeve. "You're him, aren't you?"

"...?"

"Ah!" Someone else noticed. "A handsome young man with long dark hair, wearing cultivator's robes, and carrying a jade-hilted sword. Of course!"

"Who else could it be? The saviour of us!"

"No wonder he beat the demons so easily! Where are you headed next, Jade Exorcist6They use the term 玉祓魔師 (juk6 faat1 mo1 si1) – 'Jade' 'Master who overcomes demons/Exorcist'.? Can we help you?"

"Yes, yes! Bring him some food and water. Please let us know if you need anything else!"

The villagers, like swarming bees, buzzed about fetching supplies. Several parents brought their babies over to be touched on the head by the Jade Exorcist, to gain his protection, while several young girls peeked shyly at him behind their sleeves.

At last, the young man managed to extricate himself, and after bowing his thanks for the food and water, continued walking south along the road, his water gourd now filled and arms full.

The villagers watched him go.

"Fancy that, the Jade Exorcist, here!"

"He was so cool, the way he casually dealt with those demons!"

"He didn't care at all! They were nothing to him!"

"He wasn't that handsome," a young farmer said, raising an eyebrow. Everyone immediately rounded on him.

"You're just jealous because you can't do what he does!"

"You go and kill demons then! Let's see how well you do!"

"That's... that's not what I meant! I mean, he's a bit short, isn't he? And I'm not saying he's ugly, but he's nothing special to-"

Further words were drowned out by loud protestations, and he was chased back to the village by the angry shouting.

In the meantime, the young man had wandered a fair distance down the road, gnawing on some tasty buns that someone had handed to him. He took a bite, savouring it as he wondered to himself -

Who the heck is the Jade Exorcist?


Nightfall, and the young man found a comfortable spot by the roadside to lay down. He prepared his bed by gathering together leaves into a large pile, snuggling down into them. He had briefly thought about asking the villagers for a place to stay, but with the way they had been fussing around, he expected he wouldn't get a very good rest. A peaceful spot alone was much better.

He unhooked his dou from his waist, held it to him like a child with a toy, and closed his eyes to sleep.

The heavens immediately opened and a downpour drenched him in a few seconds flat.

He opened his eyes again, deadpan.

Was there really any point in moving? He was already wet.

Still, it was very noisy and not very conducive to sleep, so he got up and began to look for shelter. In this landscape, there were few caves, and they tended to be very small, so he wasn't expecting much, but after a few minutes of searching, he saw a flicker of light between the trees.

He walked towards it.

There was a small cave ahead, with enough space for two or three people. It was already occupied – the light he had seen emanated from a little fire, and a person sat beside it. He stepped into its light, and looked at the other person.

The other person looked at him.

She was a small and slender woman, with a pretty nose and mouth, and eyes that seemed too big for her face. They didn't seem to blink much. After they had stared at the young man for a moment, the pretty mouth split into a strange grin. "Hi there."

The young man nodded in return.

With a clang, he caught a knife that came flying at his face with his still-sheathed dou, not yet reattached to his belt. The woman threw another knife, leaping into the rain at him, and he blocked this one too, only this time she caught the ricocheting knife and, holding it in her hand, brought it down towards his head.

The young man tripped over a rock behind him.

His other leg shot up and caught the woman cleanly in the stomach, sending her flying over his head and almost into a tree. She elegantly pivoted so that her feet hit it first and she bounced back, aiming again for the young man's head as he lay on the ground. He rolled, stood, and dodged the next knife she threw.

The woman jumped back into the cave and shook water from herself like a dog. "Come and get dry! You came at a good time, I was getting bored."

As she dried herself using the heat of the fire, she looked at the young man, the strange grin having never left her face. "Won't you come and dry yourself off too? You look so sad out there. We can't let you be sad."

Without hesitation, the young man entered the cave and sat opposite the smiling woman. He didn't look at her, keeping his eyelids lowered and his gaze on the fire.

The woman rested her chin on her hand, her elbow on her knee. "What's your name, Little Handsome?"

"... I don't make a point of telling my name to strangers."

"Ah, don't be like that! We had such a passionate engagement just now! I'm Teem Djeung Baak7甜像白 (teem4 djeung6 baak6) – 'Sweet' and 'To resemble purity'.. You can call me Djeung Djeung if you like."

Who the hell would like to call you Djeung Djeung?

The young man didn't respond, instead fully closing his eyes, apparently falling asleep upright. He suddenly cracked open one eye to stare at Teem Djeung Baak, who had just drawn one of her daggers.

She smiled at him. "I just wanted to see if you had really fallen asleep, that's all!"

The young man closed his eye again.

Apparently aware that she would not be able to get any advantage over him, Teem Djeung Baak behaved herself for the rest of the night, although occasionally she would start humming some song or laugh weirdly to herself. At last, the rain eased in the early morning, and the young man stood up to go.

"You really won't tell me your name, huh?" Teem Djeung Baak said, looking hurt. There was no sincerity in her expression. "Should I try and persuade you?" She produced her daggers with a huge smile.

The young man merely blinked at her before turning away.

"No fun, huh? I'll get your name out of you eventually, Little Handsome! See you later!"

The young man walked on without turning back. One really does meet all sorts of people in the world.

The road was sodden after the overnight downpour. His robes had dried a little, but they were still uncomfortable. He was glad that Teem Djeung Baak had not followed him, although he suspected that a person like her would not be easily shaken off if she put her mind to something. Ah well, he would likely never see her again.

His path led him to a wide road, broader than the one he had followed the day before. He stared down its length, disappearing over the horizon.

This had to be the Jade Road, the long trade highway that ran from Yuk-hoi in the east into the distant lands west. There were signs of high traffic, and in fact, at that moment a small train of carts slowed as they passed him. Those on board were whispering urgently to each other, and at last, a tough-looking middle-aged woman, who appeared to be the leader, leapt down and approached the young man.

"Young man, you're the Jade Exorcist, correct?" Her manner was brusque, her expression harassed.

The young man glanced at her under his lowered lids but did not confirm nor deny.

"I see your blade there, young man. We are merchants in need an escort, as there are reports of demons lurking in the valley up ahead. What would it take for you to come with us?"

"... I don't require payment." He still had plenty of food, and water was now not an issue, with all the rain.

The merchants murmured to each other.

"As I've heard, he acts unselfishly. No need for payment!"

"If only there were more people like him in the world, it would be a better place."

The young man climbed into the front cart with the merchant leader. She gave the order to move forwards, and they rolled along the road, the oxen pulling the cart sedately.

The merchants laughed and sang songs, whilst their leader and the young man sat in disinterested silence at the front. The driver of their cart felt like he was being flanked by two cold stones and dearly wished he was in another cart.

As they progressed down the road, even the chatty merchants grew quieter. They tensely peered at their surroundings as thick vegetation and valley walls began to rise around them. Any ordinary person would be anxious in this kind of atmosphere. It was the perfect place for an ambush – a narrow space with little room to flee, poor visibility, and high perches where the ambusher could attack from above.

Yet the attack came from behind.

The young man felt a sword prick his spine.

"Throw your dou away."


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