I’m really not the Saviour! (我唔係救主囖!)

43 – There’s no such thing as a miracle doctor



CW: gore, death

Cheng Baak-hap dropped her tired face into her hands and began to cry.

Chan Bik raced away to get some warm tea, while Gou Dzing placed gentle but firm hands on his Junior Sister's shoulders.

Gaam Yuk Ying, arms crossed, frowned at the dirt floor of the tent.

When Chan Bik returned with a teapot of wu loong and cups, Gou Dzing brought a drink over to Gaam Yuk Ying. “Are you okay?”

“Something's about to happen,” Gaam Yuk Ying replied, not taking the cup that was offered to him.

“Come on, take it. What do you mean?”

This time, Gaam Yuk Ying took the cup but didn't reply.

“So what do we do now?” Chan Bik asked, holding Cheng Baak-hap's hand tightly. Her freckles moved as she her brows and nose tightened.

“Our best,” Gou Dzing said, sighing. He leaned against Gaam Yuk Ying. “We can't control the demons, Chan Si-mui. We'll just have to try keeping them away from the Mortal Realm as long as possible while trying to diffuse tensions with the other kingdoms and sects. And working on communications at the same time.”

“Cheng Si-dze's exhausted,” Chan Bik said plaintively. The woman in question stared blankly at the scrolls before her, cheeks wet. Her teacup, still full, was clutched loosely in her free hand.

“Let's all stop for a bit,” Gou Dzing suggested. He finished his tea and began tidying the papers into piles. “Yuk Ying, can you get a blanket for Cheng Si-mui?”

For the next hour, barely a word was spoken. Chan Bik and Cheng Baak-hap snuggled wearily together under a blanket in one corner of the tent. Gaam Yuk Ying cleaned his swords, eyes bent downwards, frowning all the while.

“Have you worked out what's going to happen, Yuk Ying?”

He shook his head. “Gou Hei Lok was there.”

“My cousin? Where?”

“The Sek'seun border.”

It was Gou Dzing's turn to frown. “I expected my- the Gou Family to take part but... Hei Lok isn't really a warrior. What was she doing there?”

Gaam Yuk Ying shook his head.

Not long after, the rumble of Wong Tang's voice could be heard through the campsite. Chan Bik and Cheng Baak-hap sat up, rubbing their eyes blearily. They tried to stand and bow as Wong Tang entered the tent, but she waved them back down and turned to the two young men.

“Report to me.”

“A scouting party of the Two Dragons Five Tigers army attempted to cross the border of Cheon and Dzue in the west. We prevented them, and Her Majesty Gong Ming Dzue has taken charge of that area. Lady Gong Lau Yan has gone to her.”

“Ah, Ming Dzue... Really...” Wong Tang sighed. “Anything else?”

“Teem Djeung Baak appeared,” Gaam Yuk Ying added, “and crossed into Cheon.”

“We haven't heard what she did there yet, but we could smell a lot of blood. And... Gun- The Gou Patriarch was there with the scouting party.”

Wong Tang nodded comprehendingly. “It was good for you to leave.”

“Another part of demons left the Demon Realm,” Cheng Baak-hap said hoarsely. “We couldn't stop them... The army in Sek'seun killed them all. I feel like I've been wasting my time...”

“You can't save everyone, Cheng Si-mui.”

“I know. I feel like I've failed somehow, though.”

“Did you see anything, Divine Majesty?” Gaam Yuk Ying's eyes shifted back to the Grandmaster.

She reached for her belt. “Little Gou, there's a message for you.”

Mystified, Gou Dzing stretched his hand out for the bamboo scroll that Wong Tang held out.

“It's from your family.”

The scroll rolled open with a series of clacks.

'Cousin Dzing, please come and see me. I am at the military camp on the Sek'seun – Dzue border. Please talk to me. Hei Lok.'

“Could you read that, Yuk Ying?” Gou Dzing asked, trying for lightness. “It really was her.”

Gaam Yuk Ying nodded. “Don't go.”

“I need to hear her out. She's my family. I... might not get a chance to see her again.”

“Then I'll come with you.”

Gou Dzing didn't reject this offer. “Master, what will you do now?”

Wong Tang had inserted her pipe into her white hair like a hair pin. She drew it out now, and began to puff on it. “Mount Faa will be fine. Old White has temporarily gone north-west, but will soon return. The Sek'seun government is unlikely to be able to move against them. I will go to the western border of Dzue. It seems to be our weak spot. Little Gou, I agree with Little Gaam. Do not go to see your cousin.”

“Is that an order, Master?”

Fragrant smoke circled around them. Wong Tang looked very tired. “It is not. As much as I would like to, I know how stubborn you can be, my disciple, and this involves your family. I can only advise you. And I advise you strongly... you're only going to get hurt, child.”

Gou Dzing smiled apologetically. “I'm going, Master.”

“Then Gaam Yuk Ying must go with you. Little Cheng?”

“Grandmaster?”

“I know you have had issues with Maan Dzi King, but you cannot keep doing this work alone. I will send for her to support you. Speak to Dzan Dzit Fan if there are any further problems between you.”

Cheng Baak-hap nodded without enthusiasm. “Yes, Grandmaster. There is something else I want to do...”

“Yes?”

“Look into Teem Djeung Baak.”

Chan Bik tensed beside her.

“A good idea. That person, we really know nothing about her.”

With that, Wong Tang left the tent. A general feeling of lethargy settled on the group. Cheng Baak-hap stared at her ink-stained hands, Chan Bik stared at Cheng Baak-hap, Gou Dzing stared at the words on the bamboo scroll.

Gaam Yuk Ying quickly finished tidying the papers, fetched more blankets and a new pot of tin Gun Yam tea, and then stood by Gou Dzing's side, fiddling with the swords' tassels.

“Gaam Si-hing has become really reliable,” Chan Bik murmured, sipping fresh tea. “Remember when he used to have accidents all the time?”

“I don't think Gaam Si-hing was ever a clumsy person, Bik Bik. He just wasn't taking things seriously. It's just that he is now.” Cheng Baak-hap wrapped both hands around her teacup, willing herself to stand again.

Gou Dzing rolled the scroll up slowly, and turned to Gaam Yuk Ying with a resigned smile. “Let's go.”


Gou Hei Lok threw her arms around her cousin, and he hugged her back tightly. “Cousin, please come back home. The family doesn't want to fight you.”

Gou Dzing smiled weakly. “I wish with all my heart that I could say yes, cousin. But... I can't.”

“Why are you so stubborn?” Gou Hei Lok sniffed and wiped her eyes. She tugged his sleeve. “Come and sit down. Let's drink and talk.”

It was at that moment that Gou Dzing realised that Gaam Yuk Ying was no longer there. He subtly cast his senses into the ground... Nothing. There were soldiers in the camp, and his cousin, but no one else. Was Yuk Ying in a tree?

Gou Hei Lok poured out a dark, earthy bo lei into two cups, handing one to her cousin. They drank in silence.

“I used to hate bo lei,” Gou Hei Lok said at last, as she poured out fresh cups of tea. “It's so bitter.”

“I remember. You used to cry for peach juice until Uncle would tell you off.”

“Things were simpler back then, weren't they... I feel like there's no person in the world who wouldn't wish to be a child again.”

“I don't think that's true,” Gou Dzing said gently. He knew there was someone waiting in the forest behind him who probably never wanted to return to that time again. Raising the second cup to his lips, he found himself hesitating. Gou Hei Lok threw hers back like she was drinking hard liquor.

“Why are you doing this, Ah Dzing?” She fiddled with her cup, empty save for a few dark leaves. “Why would you... don't you love us?”

“It's... Hei Lok, I could say the same thing. The Two Dragons Five Tigers alliance is in the wrong here. Why would you all turn against me?”

“Ah Dzing, are you still a child?” There was a faint sneer on her face. “Justice will not feed you, clothe you, or keep you safe. The Gou Family have stood with Sek'seun for generations. This is a bond stronger than family... or immature ideas about justice.”

“I... should go.” Gou Dzing finished his second cup of tea and stood. He bowed to his cousin, drawing the line between them with physical distance.

He suddenly felt light-headed.

Not daring to move more, he focused on the sensations of his body. His head was starting to hurt, a pressure building in his neck. His hands and feet felt tethered. In spite of the cool weather, he felt hot and twitchy.

His heart thudded against the inside of his ribcage as if trying to get out.

“Gou Hei Lok... You... Loom Drug1'Loom Drug' (牽機藥 hin1 gei1 yeuk1) is a reference to the poison Strychnine, which causes spasms and tensions that causes a person to bend painfully as if they were thread tied to a loom and tightened.?”

His jaw was tightening uncontrollably and all he could taste was metal.

“I'm sorry, Yuen Muk, but it had to be done.” Gou Hei Lok's tone was apologetic, but her eyes shone with pathological curiosity. Gou Dzing's neck jerked. He tried to step towards her, but his calves spasmed and he fell to the ground instead, his limbs jerking. His heart hammered wildly.

From her sleeve, Gou Hei Lok extracted a small bottle and tipped the contents onto her hand. There were two small brown pills. “I was going to offer these to you if you would agree to come home, but I've realised you would probably be very resentful and try to leave as soon as you could. It's better for me to take some more, since I drank from the same pot. I should make sure I also don't die.”

Gou Dzing, twitching and gasping for air on the ground, barely felt the tremors of someone approaching at speed.

She threw both pills in her mouth, and swallowed.

He could only watch his cousin's decapitated head hit the earth with a wet thud. Her body followed a moment later.

Gaam Yuk Ying dropped Lo Fu Ngaa and groped inside Gou Hei Lok's neck, his bloody fingers extracting the two antidote pills.

Crouching beside Gou Dzing, he looked from the dripping pills in his palm to the convulsing man beside him.

Gou Dzing squeezed his eyes shut, then opened his mouth as far as his stiffened muscles would allow.

Yuk Ying, what kind of life have you led until now?

He barely registered the taste of blood.


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