Level Up Saintess

I could feel my heart beating harder and harder the closer I got to the back yard where Kale was. I’m sure if Chella or Meria could see or hear how hard my heart was working, they would have never allowed me back there again. Honestly, maybe I should be worried about having a heart attack if this keeps up. Maybe I would be worried, if there weren’t more important things to be worrying about right now.

 

Like, for instance, what I would say to Kale!

 

Maybe I was too distracted with the whole passing out thing, but I can’t recall Kale ever actually saying anything to me once he saw me. I think he glanced over in my direction, but he didn’t look too terribly concerned or like he recognized me, and… Well, maybe he has the same face as his last life, even if he’s now become a bird-person, so I could easily recognize him right away, but… I look and sound like a completely different person right now! I really can’t blame him for not recognizing me right away. I may have shouted his name a few times as I freaked out, but it could be that his name is just Kale in this life too, so he didn’t think much of it. After all, didn’t I name myself Arissa just like in my last life? It’s not such a weird thing to think, really.

 

And, you know, here’s another problem! I know why I’m here, but what if Kale asks me what happened? He legitimately died in a car crash, but I… Well, I’m being punished for my choices right now. I’m sure he wouldn’t be too pleased with me if he found out; He always told me that he wanted me to finally be happy, so there’s no way he would have wanted this for me. But how could he have expected me to find some way to be happy, when-!

 

“I’ll go fetch the birds for you. Are you ready?”

 

I bit the inside of my cheek and nodded to Meria. There’s no way I could trust my voice in front of her when I was currently so emotional. If I go crazy in front of her again once I see Kale then that’s fine, because it’s probably gonna happen no matter what I do since I’m currently so worked up. But no matter what happens, I can’t make Meria worry about me before I even get to see him!

 

I guess I must have looked passibly sane enough, because Meria just smiled and unlocked the cellar door again. I wonder if there’s some kind of spell I could learn to somehow bust open that door and run away with Kale if things go south here. There’s no way Meria would just be willing to loan the key to me for a while, right? The chances are probably really low… And they’ll be even lower once she sees me acting like a fool with Kale in a moment, I’m sure.

 

Maybe… Would it be worth it to hit Meria with a [Judgment] and steal the key off of her if we really had to run away? From all the bruises and obvious signs of mistreatment on all of the birds, I’m sure she must have done quite a few bad things to them. They may be slaves, but it’s possible that the Goddess won’t view them like that and might punish Meria for her wrongdoings or some such thing. She’s a priest though, so maybe the Goddess might be lenient on her? …I sure hope that’s the case; I would be absolutely gutted if I killed Meria by accident somehow. Although, I guess I should also feel bad that I’m even considering hurting her in the first place, but… Well, if you hurt my Kale, your safety is no longer an issue, I guess. I don't know, maybe I've gotten more extreme in the way I think now that I've been reincarnated here, but I can't help but think that way.

 

But yeah, I’m not a killer.

 

I don’t even care that my exp would drop to 0 if I carried out that plan, either. It wouldn’t be that hard to work back my 730/1200 exp I’m currently at if Kale and I just ran to some other town, right? Or maybe I should top myself off and level up before I carry everything out…

 

Oh, I’m being such an emotional idiot that I forgot I could just put Meria to sleep with my [Lullaby]! Really, this is completely the wrong time for me to have any smart or rational thoughts, sheesh! I should just see Kale, make sure he’s okay, and then-

 

Oh, it’s Kale!!!

 

There he is! He came out first this time! Aaaah~! I can't take it!

 

“Kale!”

 

His eyes that had been trained towards the ground the previous time I saw him were now staring directly at me, wide eyed. It’s probably because I was now sprinting at him with tears in my eyes, but hey, I’ll take whatever I can get. I practically threw myself at him once I got in range, not caring that it would send the both of us crashing down. Who cares if we get hurt falling? This is an emotional reunion, and he should feel how much I missed him! Besides, I’m a Saintess! I can easily heal some silly minor wounds like that!

 

I’m sure I must have looked like a complete idiot right now. I never tackled Kale like this in our previous lives; I was much more composed, and um… Well I guess we were both much more serious and sad people back then. It’s not like we never hugged, but we mostly did lighter affectionate things for each other, instead of such kid-ish things like 'glomping' or whatever. We had to grow up fast and be mature all of our lives, after all; It would have hurt our carefully scraped together pride if we let ourselves that loose too much, even if it was only around each other.

 

I guess losing everything really changes a person’s perspective.

Or maybe it’s just that I’ve become young and carefree somehow in this new younger body, who’s to say?

At least it’s good news that Kale managed to catch us just fine so that we wouldn’t need any healing.

 

“Kale Kale Kale Kale Kale… You have no idea how awful it was without you! You left me all alone, and I… I couldn’t take it! Your death was so sudden… And your mom didn’t even want to let me come to your funeral! I had to hold my own little goodbye to you in the backyard of the apartment building, and the landlord came and told me I couldn’t light fires back there, and I…”

 

In between the tears and the sniffling and the burying my face into his shoulder, my mind was still ticking away with its own silly thoughts. Like, for instance, I kept thinking about how amazing it was that, even though he was totally dirty and had been kept in a cellar, I could still smell the same familiar smell that I remembered Kale had. I’m not some kind of pervert, I was just breathing really deeply because of all the sniffing, okay? Just let me have this one.

 

I’d also noticed in my own odd way that Kale was a little bit taller now than he was in his previous life. I don’t know, maybe it’s just because he has those interesting bird calves now, but I think he’s about half a head taller? I even stopped my sad rambling just to look up at him and try and judge the height change, although it was hard to tell through all the tears that were coming nonstop out of my eyes.

 

…Hey, you know what’s weird? When I first saw him yesterday there was absolutely no mistaking that his face was exactly Kale’s, but now that I’m up close like this and I’m staring directly at him… When his eyes were down yesterday, they were for sure Kale’s eye shape, but now that they’re wide open and looking down at me like he’s 100% confused why I’m doing this… Yeah, they’re totally shaped like a bird’s eye, right? Like a hawk’s, or maybe an eagle’s? Is there a difference? I wouldn’t be able to tell for sure, but yeah, a predatory bird's eyes, it’s gotta be. They’re yellow-y gold. How interesting... You know, mine are pale yellow with little flecks of white in them. In a way, our eyes kind of match, right? Or at least I think they do. That’s really nice…

 

Um, also his eyes are kind of um… moving funny?

 

It’s kind of like his eyes are constantly making little micromovements, like they’re repeatedly readjusting, you know? They rarely ever stopped in one place for very long either, and if he blinked, it was really fast and far between. I’m sure I’m not explaining it well, but yeah, I can really tell he’s scanning every last bit of my face over… It’s really weird. You know, in our past lives, Kale always had this calm, steady gaze on his face, and he blinked really slowly, like a cat showing that it trusted you. He never would have shown such outright interest like he is right now, especially since the way his bird eyes are doing it is um… very unhuman-like. It was because of the way his mom raised him, you see. His dad was rarely home, and his mom was crazy or something. She had very rigid standards for what she wanted Kale to be like, and if he acted in some way that she didn’t like, even with just his facial expressions, then she would hit him like she really meant it. She was a petite woman, but man did she know how to hit, if Kale's wounds were anything to go off of!

 

So yeah, Kale was taught to be like that for over 20 years before he finally managed to move out and escape his mother, and she still sometimes dropped by unannounced and gave him shit even after that. Would someone like him be able to look at me unreservedly like this, even if he’s in a new body?

 

…Oh, maybe he’s been here for much longer than me. I only came here a week ago at 17, but he looks like he should be around 20… Has he been here this whole time or something? If it was another 20 years, then it’s completely possible that he shook off his mom’s stupid teachings, but… Huh. No, it just doesn’t feel right.

 

“Kale…?”

 

Yeah, and the way he doesn’t seem to show any kind of recognition for his name is also really bothering me. He hasn’t replied to my calls even once. Maybe he still doesn’t realize it’s me...? But I talked about his death and his mom and everything, though! Shouldn't he have figured out it by now?!

 

“It’s me Kale! It’s Arissa!”

 

Oh. Oh no. He really doesn’t seem like he remembers me.

…How could this be happening…?

 

“Kale! It’s me! I’m Arissa! There’s no way you don’t know me! Kale!”

 

I guess I was shaking him in desperation before I even realized what I was doing. Kale wasn’t even resisting; He just let me grab his arms and move him as I pleased. And all the while, his big bird eyes never stopped looking at me like he was studying everything about me.

 

“Please! Say something! Anything! Just tell me you remember me!”

 

The tears that had stopped while I was busy looking at him earlier had now come back with a vengeance. My eyes stung, and my arms were getting tired from shaking him. Hell, even the corners of my mouth were aching from the frowny shape they were stuck in. I could hear Chella behind me trying to reach out and convince me to let go and leave, but it sounded like it was miles away with how focused I was on Kale. I wasn’t going to miss a single thing that came out of his mouth! I wouldn’t miss it for the world! I-

 

And then finally, Kale opened his mouth. His lips parted, and the completely wrong words came out.

 

“I’m sorry, but I don’t know who Kale is.”