My Enigmatic Life

                As soon as Akai and Akane arrive, our seniors gather us all together in front of the whiteboard and a collapsible table that has several small panes of glass of it. Miyamura-senpai clears his throat and begins to speak.

"Good, you're all here.", he says."As you know, we've been away attending to some business related to being an Enigma Squadron. I would let you in on the details, but I can't since you all aren't official members yet."

That's understandable, a little disappointing, but understandable. We've still got a week to go before we become an actual Enigma Squadron after all.

"But I do have some good news; we'll be learning your elemental leanings today!"

"About time!", Naoya says excitedly. "How do we go about it?!"

Shirogane-senpai smiles warmly at his gung-ho attitude.

"It's simple, Naoya-kun, just pick up one of those Spirit Panes. Your leaning will be shown by what happens when you hold them."

Naoya jumps up and rushes towards the table, with me not too far behind. What? It sounds absolutely super, so I really want to try it.

"Somethings will never change...", Yoko says, smiling reminiscently.

Miyamura gives us instructions on how to use the Spirit Panes.

"Hold the first one in your dominant hand, then the second one in the other. From there you just keep stacking them in your hands until they stop reacting."

Naoya and I nod repeatedly, and since the former got to the table first, he goes first. Naoya picks up a pane with his right hand, and we stare at it intently.

Almost immediately, the pane separates into four even pieces as if cut by a blade.

"Woah!", we exclaim in unison. "Awesome!"

Without skipping a beat, Naoya picks up another one, this time with his left. We wait with bated breath, but nothing happens.

"So that's it.", Yonaguni says. "Looks like your element is 'Wind', Mop-Head."

Naoya looks down at the sliced pane with a mixture of intrigue and exhilaration. 

"This is starting to get interesting."

Now, it's my turn. I pick up the first pane with my right, and in short order it begins to stain rapidly. Next, my left.

This time, cracks begin to spider in the glass. So, that's two for me, at least.

"Keep going, Govvy.", Naoya presses.

"Right."

I grab another pane and stack it on top of the one in my right, and surprisingly something happens! The pane suddenly becomes pitch black! I quickly try another one, but nothing happens. So, that means I have three elemental leanings, right? That has to be a good thing, no?

"Not bad, Daisuke! Having three element leanings is above average, usually most people only have one or two.", Miyamura-senpai says with interest."

So it is a good thing. I don't know why I thought it wouldn't be, seeing as to how I've seen Sunni use four different elements before. But to think figuring it out would be this cool.

"Judging by the reactions of your Spirit Panes, your elements are 'Fire', 'Lighting' and 'Darkness'.", Miyamura-senpai continues.

"That's interesting."

The others join us in our little discussion, with Yoko voicing her thoughts.

"What's that, Yoko-chan?", Shirogane-senpai asks.

"Well, I'm just surprised that Aniki and Naoya-nii wield 'Fire' and 'Wind' respectively. My elements happen to be those two, so I'm wondering if it's something that's passed on through blood."

Shirogane-senpai gives Yonaguni the side-eye.

"You didn't teach her that, Nariki?"

"Well, I didn't think it would be important.", Yonaguni says offhandedly.

Before Shirogane-senpai can begin to scold him, Sunni starts explaining things to us.

"That's right, Yoko. As a matter of fact, one's elemental leanings are entirely hereditary. And while it generally depends on the parents, it's not un-common to get an element from another family member."

"Full marks, Arianne-san. Just what you'd expect from a member of the prestigious Renford family."

"Oh, you flatter me, Miyamura-senpai."

"Alright, alright, Mr.Charming.", Yonaguni interrupts scornfully. "Get on with the rest, will you? I just bought some new doujinshis and I'm looking forward to researching them."

There's no way he just said that out in public.

"What kind of doujinshis?", Gege asks.

"You serious, Gege?", Akai says in disbelief.

Yonaguni laughs lowly as he whips out a doujinshi from out of thin air. I don't know how the hell he did that.

"Only the best genre ever created: NTR."

"You absolute piece of shit, what's your goddamn problem, huh?!"

"WHAT DID YOU TWO FUCKERS JUST SAY TO ME?!"

I should've known that this sick bastard would be into that. 

"You two cretins couldn't begin to understand the glory of NTR!", Yonaguni yells intensely. "There's nothing that comes close!"

"What a tosspot you are...", Naoya spits, his voice brimming with disdain.

"What's NTR?", Akane asks.

"NOTHING! AND DON'T LOOK IT UP!"

"O-okay..."

Akai, Gege, Naoya and I scream out this warning in unison, begging her to stay away.

"Oi, Inko. Maybe you'll like this one.", Yonaguni sneers."It's about a little cousin who takes away her big cousin from his girl."

"Ah, yes. That sounds about as delightful as a bit of soy sauce on top of a plate of horse dung."

"Let's continue with learning our kouhais' elemental leanings, shall we?"

Shirogane-senpai, who's clearly fed up with our talk, presses on with what we're actually here for.

"Let me go next!", Haruhi-chan clamours excitedly.

Miyamura-senpai looks at her with surprise.

"Really? I didn't think you'd be interested, seeing as how you're an Adjuctant."

"Well, it seems totes cool, so I have to try it!"

"Haha! Well, go ahead and give it a go."

Haruhi-chan picks up a Spirit Pane, and in a tick it begins to wave and ungulate, with her second pane turning pitch black. Miyamura-senpai informs her that her elemental leanings 'Water' and 'Darkness'. Yoko knows hers, so she's skipped. Sunni and Gege are also skipped, the former already knowing her leanings like Yoko and the latter not really giving a toss, leading the way for Akane.

"It turned to dust!", she exclaims. "Is that a bad thing?!"

"It's perfectly normal, Akane-chan. That just means that your element leaning is 'Earth'.", Shirogane-senpai reassures her.

"We have the same leaning, Akane-chan!", Yonaguni smiles charmingly. "Isn't that nice?"

Akane subconciously makes a retching noise and covers her mouth, causing cracks to appear in Yonaguni as he legitmately turns to stone.

 Naoya and I struggle to keep our composure, while everyone else looks on with some sembalance of pity. Everyone except for-

"Uhm, guys? Is this supposed to happen?"

Akai calls to us, grabbing our attention. He's holding a Spirit Pane in his dominant hand, but it remains in its netrual state.