NOVEL SIMPLE Fish In A Barrel
My body is wrong again. Deeply wrong. Maybe worse than it ever was. I'm not even sure I'm human shaped. Everything feels wrong. Joints are in the wrong spots, arms are too long, I can't even see my legs tucked in under this table but they feel like they've been pulled on a rack. What's happening to me?
Scott, Summer, Leo and Ziggy sit at the lunch table, they barely acknowledge me. Do they not see me? I don't want them to, if I look as awful as I feel. They might confuse me for a monster we need to fight. Something that's failing to emulate a human. I need to slip away. I excuse myself and none of them react. It’s like I’m a ghost. Not even Scott notices as I get further and further away.
Standing up makes it clear how much is wrong. My legs barely seem to move as I walk.
People thankfully don't see me as I walk through the school’s hallways. I’m tempted to try talking but if this body is anything to go by, the voice that comes out will hurt to hear. If I was willing to touch someone I could test whether I’m incorporeal or just invisible but it doesn't matter enough. I don't want to be seen like this anyway. I just need to keep my head down until I can figure out what's going on.
Someone brushes by me and they look around for what they bumped into, looking right through me and continuing like nothing happened. Like our collision had just been an odd occurrence, or a lapse in balance. I guess I'm just invisible. Is this my life again? Has it ever really changed? I'm nobody. Being a man is out of reach, being myself was never going to be an option. I don't even have my friends this time. It's just those first few years all over again. Is it even worth living like this? Walking through endless hallways in a body I hate with no one able to see me.
It’s hard to move when my eyes finally open. My sheets are soaked with sweat, my legs stick to my pants, but at least I know it was a dream. My body is still mine. Even while gross and sticky, it’s mine. A nightmare can’t take that away from me.
I almost forgot how it feels to wake up feeling like your body is made of lead. Rolling over is a herculean task, and the result doesn’t help me all that much. It at least reminds me that my body is still right. Laying on my stomach isn't going to be easy from now on.
This is just what I need before school. Is it even time to be awake yet? What am I going to wear? Do I want to risk standing out? Dad and I talked to the teachers about what I'm meant to do, but I don't exactly trust them to protect me? They didn't do great with me before, why would now be any different? At least I'm not alone this time. So dress, or hoodie.
Introducing myself to people at school would be easier if they believed me, which is a point towards the hoodie and jeans and if worse comes to worst I can hide. On the other hand, I have really liked wearing dresses the last two weeks and if I’m trying to convince other people that I’ve changed it might be better to be completely unrecognisable, completely erase all memories of the other me with a big impression. Is that me though? Am I the type of person to do that? To show up in a flashy dress as my new first impression for my classmates?
It was so easy as Filia, no one had preconceived notions of her aside from Summer. When I started wearing dresses everyone just assumed that’s how Filia has always been. It wasn't dramatic. There was no reveal. No one knew it was me and that made it so much easier. And what if people thought that this was a joke. That this girl isn't me. I didn't want to risk that.
Dad knocks on my door. At least I didn't have more time to think about it. Hoodie it is. I am not as brave when everyone knows it's me in the dress. I slip into the jeans and my hoodie that the younger me chose. She was right about it being comfortable, though I’m not sure about if I'm okay with how well fitting it is. Could I get away with wearing one of my old hoodies instead? I doubt dad would let me out of the house in one. I look ridiculous in them now.
My phone vibrates.
Scott: Hey can you meet me behind school.
Filia: Did I do something wrong?
Scott: Just be there.
There goes my hopes of calming down. Dad insists I make myself breakfast before he drops me at school. I wish Scott being vague didn't scare me. There is something off about what he said. I must have done something. It doesn't sound like this is for a pep talk. I don't even know what I could’ve done.
Walking into school reminds me of something. I can't remember what though. I head to where we usually meet in the mornings before heading to talk to Scott. I could at least get a pep talk from Summer before seeing what's happening. Realistically, Scott might just be having an off day and want to talk. Maybe I did something wrong and he just wants to talk about it. Still he’s always been more forward than this.
It could be a confession? Away from everyone else, vague, and urgent. I still haven’t figured out whether we should risk it. Things have changed. Today is meant to be the start of more massive changes. Does he expect me to make a decision today? That doesn’t sound like him. He’s been patient so far… but maybe he’s tired of waiting.
I can’t find anyone at our meetup spot. It's eight forty-five, Summer and Leo are usually here by now. I haven't gotten any messages from the others about a change in plan or them skipping school. Something’s fishy about this. Summer said she would be here today. She wouldn't lie about that. There is obviously the possibility that my friends could have abandoned me but I don't know why they would have taken so long.
No one seems to notice me. The school isn't exactly small. I guess that's to be expected. I do not need to be found and hit on like Scott was. If a guy like him froze, how would I react? Probably not well. There are so many different meanings that “behind the school” could mean. At least they were in order so I could pass by them as I head to the line of trees across the oval. The most secluded place in the whole damn place. A patch of trees where no one would want to be just before the bell, especially not someone like Scott. I don't think he's been late in his life.
This is wrong. Obviously wrong. I should wait. If it is Scott hopefully he'll get why I'm cautious. Maybe I'm being way too cautious or suspicious but after being knocked out by a crab wizard and a hypno ray I think it's justified. Only five minutes before the bell rings and almost everyone else has cleared out. I can't see a trace of Scott in the tree line.
Filia: Do you mean out in the trees?
Scott: Yes. Where are you?
Maybe it's an idealised version of him that I've created in my head but I think Scott would be a lot more gentle about getting me to go anywhere? I could blow him off and go to class but if it's not him how did they get his phone. Is he in trouble? Is it ranger related? It could be life and death if that’s the case.
Filia: Give me five minutes. I still have to talk to a teacher.
I sit behind a fence post. Not full cover but enough that unless he shows himself he shouldn't be able to see me through the trees. If something is trying to lure me out there, I won’t be as weak as I was before. I can morph without repercussions now, no more changing shenanigans or low energy.
The first bell rings and I move out from behind the post. I need to keep my distance from the tree line. I stalk my way around the outside of the oval, keeping an eye on the tree line. If there is a monster waiting to catch me then I want it as far away from me as possible until I can fight it. There's no signs of those anemone headed freaks anywhere which is a plus. At least they aren't swarming for surveillance. Maybe to keep a low profile. If there’s a panic I won't show up.
I really don't have much to go on here to suspect something’s wrong. Aside from hoping my friends haven't left me alone today and Scott not being as nice as usual. I could be completely over reacting. They could just be late. I didn't stick around, and Scott is waiting for me. Am I just trying to distract myself? Still I can't shake the feeling that everything is just wrong. I can't let everyone down by being captured.
Standing behind a large eucalyptus is a vaguely humanoid shape. From a distance I can already tell something is wrong, from its red carapace, its misshapen hands, even how tall it is. I really didn't want to be right. Should I call Astrus? If I don't show up something might happen to the others. Did it get them too? Maybe it's cowardly to try to take it down from here, but what was the point of a ranged weapon if I didn't use it like one? I slip my morpher out of my bag.
“Galah Power,” I whisper into it.
The transformation feels completely different now that it's not working to correct everything about me. Gone is the pleasant feeling of my body being moulded into my preferred form, now I actually feel like a superhero. There's no distractions anymore. Even my suit felt like it had changed slightly. If the Power could feel, I'd imagine it was telling me it was proud by making me feel this alive.
I sneak myself closer to the thing. As I get closer, all doubt I have about this being a trap disappears. This monster even looks like a trap, a mangled wire cage surrounds it. The mangling doesn't look like it's natural either. This guy has taken a heavy beating. A plate of armour clings to one side of its fucked up mesh. It taps its feet impatiently. Under all that mesh and metal it looks vulnerable.
I draw back a set of three arrows. At least one would make it. I had plenty more to go. I just didn't want to lose the element of surprise. I take a deep breath and release my fingers. The arrows whistle through the air.
“Oh crud,” the creature says as an arrow is impaled in the space it's sternum would be. I load and fire another arrow. It looks at me for a second and tries to say something else, before the arrow lands, its back explodes out leaving me alone on the oval.
The Galah should be strong enough for me to pick it up by its armour and get it away from the school when it grows. After that I don't know what I'm going to do. I should have called Astrus first. Focusing on what I can do takes priority. The metal meshes should be easy to rip apart with the Galah’s beak. If the normal ones can take apart wires leading to a house they should be able to rip something as simple as wire apart. I can do this.
I tap my communicator.
“Astrus, a monster just tried to lure me behind the school, I dealt with it but I don't know where the others are.”
He doesn't even respond before teleporting me to the command centre. Even the teleportations were less violent now that I wasn't being morphed in transit. I need to focus. Everyone could be in trouble and I might have to fight this thing alone again.
“Filia, what do you mean you ‘dealt with it’?”
“I mean I beat it. Can you get a hold of the others?”
“You engaged it alone?” He sounds worried.
“I didn't really have another choice.” I argue.
“Fair enough. Well done. I will try to contact them.”
“I think the other might have been attacked as well, it had Scott's phone. It tried to lure me out with it.” Did it get them? Are they all fighting their own monsters or am I the last one it got to?
“You have done well, Filia. Can you please get ready in the Galah in case it returns.”
“On it.”