Self Insert as Spider-Man MCU

With the formalities over, I was pretty much bum-rushed out of the palace and hauled to the hangar bay to my transport. I was handed a stack of diplomatic papers an inch thick and then ushered into my transport. Thankfully, with the stolen vibranium out of the way and the museum crates being removed, there was room for my new stuff and I reinstalled the co-pilot's seat for Jubadi to sit down.

“Thank you, Royal Consort.” Jubadi said and saluted me.

“I'm not going to be able to order you to not do that, am I?” I asked and started the pre-flight checks.

“No.” Jubadi said and smiled. “However, if you ask nicely, I might save it for when we are alone.”

I stopped what I was doing and turned to her, reached over and gripped her ears tightly, and stared intensely into her eyes. “It is a very long flight to get back to the United States, Jubadi. Unless you don't want me to fuck you senseless when we are in international waters, you will only use normal deference towards me when in public and not the full royal treatment!”

Jubadi's eyes looked into mine intensely for a moment before she nodded. I pulled her close and kissed her hard, hard enough to bruise, and she moaned. I let her go and the look she gave me was full of longing and desire.

“I'm glad Shuri gave me some of your healing tech.” I commented as I went back to the flight checks.

Jubadi let out a soft moan because she was looking forward to marking my freshly healed and unmarked skin.

The look of disappointment on Shuri's face when she had healed her bite marks on my face, had almost been heartbreaking. I promised that we would see each other soon and that she could mark me again and show me off to her people once more. She had nodded and kissed me hard after that.

I powered up the Quinjet and sent a signal to the sting ship that would be guiding us out of Wakandan airspace. They sent an acknowledgement back and I lifted off and flew out of the hangar. It was right on top of me for only a few seconds before it activated camouflage mode and then it fluttered and disappeared.

“The king was right. You have granted us a great power by helping us, sithandwa.”

It took me a second to get it. “Sweetheart? No, darling.”

Jubadi smiled. “You are learning much quicker than anyone expected.”

“I don't have any choice when you all kept slipping Xhosa words in place of English ones.” I said. “I wouldn't mind an actual dictionary or a schoolbook, though.”

Jubadi motioned towards the cargo area. “Princess Shuri and Queen Ramonda have given you a betrothal present.”

“I thought it was my job to spoil the princess with gifts until the marriage.” I said and followed the right flight path to exit the Wakandan Energy Barrier without frying the transport. Once we were out, I hit the button to activate my own camouflage that I had fabricated and we went invisible before I poured on the power to raise us up to international flight height.

Having access to a metal fabricator was ridiculously fun, because it could pump out practically anything you wanted if you had the right ingredients to produce it and the proper design specs, like for custom made chromium covered reflective armored plates.

I would never steal the fabrication technology from the Wakandans, though. It was too valuable of a resource and would destroy all of the trust I had built up with them.

“It is your job to provide gifts, sithandwa.” Jubadi said. “Their gift will just enhance the gifts you give in return.”

I barked a laugh and gave her crooked smile. “I doubt I can top what I've already left for her.”

“What did you give the princess?” Jubadi asked.

“Something she never would have expected.” I said cryptically. “We can watch the video after it's sent to me.”

*

Shuri was extremely sad with Ben gone and even spending an hour with her mother consoling her, hadn't raised her spirits much. She loved her mother deeply and Ramonda indulged her a little too much sometimes; but, she was her only daughter and the princess of an entire kingdom. Some spoilage was expected.

Having to say goodbye to her recently betrothed was just too much for her to accept without being depressed, however. No one begrudged the princess for being sad about it.

Shuri entered her lab and she let out a loud sigh. Two of the women across the room let out girlish giggles and then had a little verbal spar. Shuri paid them no mind until one of them let out a happy shout and carried an envelope over to her.

“What is this?” Shuri asked as the lab technician handed it to her.

“Something the princess will use to remember her promised mate, your highness.” The woman said, saluted and bowed, and ran back over to the other woman. They let out girly giggles again and watched her.

Shuri opened the envelope and pulled out the stylishly written letter and read it in her mind.

My dearest Shuri,
I am so sorry that we must be apart for now and I want you to know that I am almost as sad as you are.

Shuri bristled a bit. Almost as sad? What is he saying?

I know that put your hackles up and I'll explain why. You see, I have Jubadi to constantly remind me of what I'm leaving behind while also taking part of Wakanda with me. So, I wanted to give you something that should let you remember me every time you see it, because I'm leaving a part of myself there for you.

Shuri was confused. What could it possibly be? He has already given me all of his ideas!

Please walk forward ten paces, turn to the right, and shout 'Ben is Mine!'. You're welcome in advance and I hope you enjoy your engagement gift.
Yours always, Benji

Shuri did as asked and took ten steps and turned to the right. “Ben is MINE!” She shouted.

The doors to an alcove that held generic tools for diagnostics opened up and Shuri gasped in shock and let the letter and envelope fall to the floor. It wasn't tools inside the alcove anymore. It was something that she never thought she would ever see. It was something from her dream as a child that she had absently shared with Ben while in bed together.

A four foot tall mechanical Cheetah, with ears and prehensile tail, stood there on all four paws and stared at her. Tears came to Shuri's eyes as the mechanical cat took a single step towards her and its tail swished behind it. She dropped to her knees and held her arms open for it and it stalked over to her. It let out a purr and rubbed its face on hers, then it hugged her... and hugged her... and then she was wearing the Cheetah.

Shuri slowly stood and looked over at the two lab technicians that looked immensely pleased. She ignored the electronics details the display gave her about the two women and she walked across the lab. There was a full length mirror that was used to model the Black Panther suits for fit and functionality.

She gasped again, because she looked beautiful, graceful, and deadly. She was also a foot taller than normal and her feet were not impeded by having a similar shape to a real cheetah's legs. It was then that she realized her feet were not in the feet at all and were in the ankle part instead. That never would have occurred to her, even if she somehow had thought she could make a suit for herself, which she didn't.

A recorded message popped up and Shuri clicked it with the eye recognition program that Ben had given to her.

“Hey, beautiful.” Ben said in the video as he reclined against the work bench and pet the mechanical cheetah at his side. “You gave me the idea when you commanded me to give T'Challa proper cat-like responses. I wasn't sure what I could do to realize it, then you mentioned your dream and I knew I had to do it for you. So, this is my present for you.”

“Oh, Benji.” Shuri whispered.

“When you're not wearing it, it will be your companion and will follow you everywhere. It has basic autonomous functions, which you can review later. You can also teach it or program it however you want. It can attack, defend, and...” Ben paused and laughed. “...it will lick itself to clean its fur like a real cat.”

Shuri let out a laugh as well. She knew her brother would be wondering if she and Ben had given his suit similar programming.

“Have fun annoying T'Challa with it and there's no need to let anyone know it is also a BPSuit. Save it for a surprise... or you can shock everyone as it runs rampant and then attacks you to start eating you... and then you become it.”

Shuri laughed pretty hard at the perfect prank. She really liked that Ben knew her that well and they had only been together for a few days.

“I will call you tomorrow after my Aunt May finishes tearing a strip off of me, not to mention my boss.” Ben said and shrugged. “All I can say is that it was worth all the effort to get to you, even if meeting you hadn't been part of my plans. Who would have thought I would meet someone so wonderful from the other side of the world?”

“I feel the same way, Benji.” Shuri said, even though it was a recording.

“I've already sworn your lab techs to secrecy by giving them a few more ideas to make. Good luck getting them to tell you about them! Ha ha!” Ben said and waved, as did the cheetah. “Until we talk again.”

Shuri waved her hand as the video ended and she stood there for quite some time as she stared at herself. She really was a quite beautiful humanoid cheetah, with sleek lines, a lithe figure, and deadly paws with retractable claws. With a nod and a mental command, the suit folded off of her and reformed into the Cheetah.

Shuri pet its head and it let out a purr. “Come. I need to show you off to mother.”

The cheetah let out a half-bark and half-growl and padded along beside her as she left the lab. Neither Shuri nor the cat saw the two lab techs give each other a high five and one sent the video to the young man that had such wonderful ideas for things.

*

“Helicarrier Tower, this is Too-Far. Requesting landing coordinates.” Ben's voice came out of several speakers.

“Too-Far, this is Tower Control!” One of the women on the various consoles responded excitedly. “We don't have visual! I repeat, we cannot see you! Abort landing procedure and confirm your position!”

There was silence on the line for a moment.

“My apologies, Tower Control. I forgot I still had that on.” Ben's voice said and then everyone in the tower made disbelieving sounds as a Quinjet decloaked right in front of the tower. “I also have a nearly full cargo hold of confiscated and illegal weapons. Is there anywhere they need to be delivered or do I leave them on the transport?”

The woman in charge of him shook her head. “Negative on all of that, Too-Far. We are under specific orders to call certain people when you finally returned. After you land, you are to remain onboard and those individuals will be by soon to debrief you.”

“As long as it's not Black Widow or Hawkeye, I don't mind waiting.” Ben said. “If either of them show up, I'll shoot first and ask questions about senior officer stupidity later.”

“Um... roger that, Too-Far.” The woman said, nervous that someone had just said they would attack if approached by the wrong person. “Change to vector 23, South by South West. You're clear for the lower deck, Section 8.”

Ben chuckled. “Wonderful. I get the crazy landing zone.”

“Excuse me?” She asked.

“Look up what the old army discharge code Section 8 entails.” Ben said as the Quinjet moved away and whirled around as if on a swivel and then flew backwards. “Approaching landing zone.”

Several people stood to watch as the transport as it did things they were sure wasn't supposed to be possible, then instead of landing on the outer pad, the damn thing flew inside the lower deck.

“Get me a video feed from down there!” The night captain of the carrier shouted.

The main display was changed and everyone watched as the Quinjet manoeuvred around the other jets, forklifts, cargo, and crewman without affecting anything with the engine backwash and it settled perfectly into the assigned section without a squeal from the tires.

“Someone needs to update his flight status rating.” The captain said and everyone nodded.

*

Maria Hill was sound asleep when her priority alarm rang. She hopped out of bed and turned it off, dressed in her uniform because she had taken a shower before going to bed, and checked the urgent message on her cell phone. An uncharacteristic sound, almost guttural, came from her throat.

Agent Parker should have been back at SHIELD late Friday night, or possibly Saturday morning, for a full debriefing about his mission. It was now 3am on Tuesday morning and she was not happy.

Maria went downstairs to the garage and climbed into the standard SHIELD unmarked car assigned to her and she drove away from her modest house to head towards the docks at the harbour. There was already a ferry transport there waiting for her and she drove aboard with her stoic face as stoic as ever.

The trip to the aircraft carrier in the harbour was quick, because the ferry operator knew exactly who she was, and it docked to the loading ramp of the ship and let her drive off unimpeded.

Maria nodded to the man and drove inside the disguised helicarrier and drove through the ship along the main serviceway. It allowed planes to be brought out of storage to the giant elevator at the end of the ship and raised to the flight deck for preparations and take-off.

She pulled to a stop at the right section and she had to clamp her mouth shut to stop her laugh at the large number 8. Like Ben, she had gotten the joke right away. She parked the car and saw the signs of a shootout. She sighed and shook her head as she stepped out of the car and walked over to where two of the agency's best agents had taken cover behind a forklift.

“Director Fury specifically ordered you to NOT antagonize Agent Parker.” Maria said to Natasha and Clint, whom wore their iron suits. Damaged iron suits.

“We didn't!” Clint said and motioned to the Quinjet. “We came here to apologize and he started shooting at us before we came close to the ramp.”

Maria took out her cell phone and read the message out loud. “Priority Code from Nightwatch Captain: Alpha, November, Golf, Romero, Yankee - Agent Parker. Message follows: Only appropriate brass permitted for meeting and retrieval. Threatened to fire upon agents Hawkeye and Widow if present. Deck will be cleared for meeting.”

Neither of them said anything.

“I'm only slightly surprised that you didn't lie and say you didn't receive the whole message.” Maria said and put her cell phone away. “At least you didn't open fire yourselves.”

“We can't. Priority override.” Clint said. “We can't target the suit's creator, Director Fury... or you.”

Maria wasn't sure why she felt happy about that. “I assume you tried to have the tech guys pull the code?”

“Yes, and they can't. It's integrated with the hardware. Any tampering and it shuts down completely.” Natasha said, a little angry. “It takes a six hours to reboot.”

“Even if you're inside.” Clint said. “I had to wait to go to the bathroom for almost four hours.”

“That could be a problem when on long missions...” Maria started to say.

“You need to read the instructions all the way through.” Ben's voice said over the Quinjet's external speakers. “The suits have appropriate plumbing connections to handle number ones. It can't handle a number two yet, though. I can't figure out how to miniaturize a sewage processing system inside the belt.”

“What does it do with the urine?” Clint asked.

“Stores it until you discharge it. There's only so much it'll hold, so don't try saving it up to see how much that is. Empty it as soon as you're in an appropriate spot, like discreetly outside or into the closest toilet.” Ben said.

Maria turned towards the Quinjet. “Agent Parker, cease fire. I am approaching.”

“Of course, Deputy Director.” Ben said. “As long as you leave the other two where they are.”

“My orders are not conditional, Agent Parker.” Maria said, sternly.

“My acceptance is.” Ben said and her eyes widened. “After attempting to knock me out, they were going to drop me off in the Columbian jungle, without any resources, to complete my mission. I was then supposed to find my way back to civilization.”

“That isn't much for survival training.” Maria said. “The closest town was...”

“They meant the United States.” Ben interrupted. “Second and third world countries are not considered civilized by the modern definition.”

Maria looked back at the two custom Iron suits and neither agent denied it.

“We were going to monitor and shadow him.” Natasha said.

“He wouldn't have been in any real danger.” Clint added.

“As you can see, my choice to no longer trust the people I've helped so much, is perfectly logical.” Ben said. “Fool me once? Shame on me. Fool me twice? Shame on you. Fool me three times? You will never get near me again. Ever.”

Natasha let out a sigh. “Ben, I'm sorry.”

“It doesn't matter, because you can be sorry all you want. It's your actions that define you, Iron Widow. I told you that.” Ben said and her head dropped. “After that last trick you tried to pull on me, I absolutely refuse to work with either you or Iron Hawk in any capacity. If you are even mentioned in any briefing that I'm involved in, I'll quit SHIELD and I'll take all of my toys with me.”

“Fuck.” Clint whispered and Natasha and Maria heartily agreed.