The Gate of Shadows

"Hm... That’s unusual." Fenris murmured, caging me under him.

The tone of his voice triggered me to glance away from him as I tried to find the strength within me to lie to him.

Will you notice? Of course, you will.

I didn’t want to lie to him, but I had no choice.

If you know what I wanted, you’ll do anything to stop it. I’m your precious charge, after all.

"I..." I tried to speak but choked.

My nerves made this wolf even more suspicious, prompting him to eye me down more closely. He had always been the person who brought me everything I needed, including all my hygiene items.

So, a simple excuse about it won’t work! Think Lilith! Think!

All this time, I was dreading giving it to Melody; I never thought Fenris would be the one to catch me.

"What did you give to Melody?" he asked straight forward.

You already know I’m up to something.

"I..." I tried to lie, but my tongue felt heavy.

It was almost as if my whole being didn’t want to, yet I was cornered. If I wanted to go behind his back. I had no choice but to lie through my teeth. He would never let me become what I had to be.

I collected my thoughts for a moment before carefully opening my mouth.

"I-I... gave her a list of items I need for my cycle that’s coming soon. S-She had recommended some new pads, and I wanted to try them out." I tried to hide my lie with some truth.

He, out of everyone, knew the exact day my menstrual cycle began. After all, he never touched me intimately while I was on my period, and it was due in a couple of days. Usually, while I was on it, he would cuddle me to sleep.

Carefully, Fenris studied every expression and body gesture, hoping to read me.

Is it good enough? Will you believe me? I wouldn’t.

Those thoughts bombarded me as doubt set in, and he knew something was off.

My wolf... is too clever... and too caring to deceive.

"Right... So why did you stutter? Nervous about something?" he questioned more assertively.

The only way to do that would be by changing his mind from watchful to something else.

What better way to do that than to seem like the innocent girl you wish me to be?

He was right. I was turning into a devilish woman.

"Because of you," I mumbled, feeling pressured by his query.

Even though I thought I was finished, my words caught his attention differently from before. Fenris's expression changed from concern to amusement, triggering a smile to rise on his lips before licking them temptingly.

"Oh? Yesterday wasn’t enough?" he teased.

I, for a moment, was caught off guard.

It worked?!

My cheeks burned from the heat that rushed through my face; remembering everything he did the day before made me feel wanted and loved. This slip, perhaps, was the only chance I had to get him off my trail for the time being, and it wasn’t like I didn’t want it either.

"It’s never enough," I whispered, flustered by his playful tease.

For a moment, I thought he would return to what he was previously querying about, but his cheeks turned rosy, much like mine. His ears slanted back, amazed by what I said, too. He probably thought I would stay silent or give in to his previous curiosity.

I’m too bold!

Grabbing onto my chin, Fenris tugged me into a light kiss before separating from me, chuckling.

Adorable…

"I-I see,” he stumbled, clearing his throat.

Trailing his fingers down my sides, a smile soon rose on his lips. “I’ll try to fix that before I can’t touch you for a couple of days," he assured me, kissing me once again, this time more feverously.

The moment his tongue caressed mine, prompting a whine released from me. His hand traveled down my dress and onto my hip, causing me to shiver. I couldn’t help but respond by grabbing his shirt, only for him to separate from me again, taking it off.

His features were so well defined, yet those dark circles remained prominent. I watched him tower over me again before my hand instinctively touched his chest. I trailed down to his navel and into his pants, where I unbuckled them.

For some reason, I really, really want you, Fenris.

A soft chuckle left his lips, leaning into me before licking my cheek and kissing me again when my eyes shifted onto him. Once his heat was in my hands, I caressed, triggering a slight groan to be released from his lips while they worked on mine.

Impulsively, he tugged my arms away from his heat, trailing kisses from my neck down to my chest, peeling off my clothes.

I tried to touch him again but met the bed instead of his skin. My wolf pinned me once again, kissing me more forcefully. It wasn’t long before most of my clothes were gone, and I was in my underwear alone.

He traced his fingers down my bare body before planting them on my hips. There, he yanked me towards the edge of the bed, triggering a squeal to leave me. I watched, yearnfully, while he licked his fingers before he invaded my underwear and depths with them.

His touch set my body ablaze, rendering me incapable of pulling away from him. The way his fingers caressed my walls made my voice run wild as a knot formed in my core. Even though we did it multiple times the day before, I never tired of feeling him.

Dazed by his touch, I didn’t realize when he took off my underwear. No, I was entranced by him the entire time; it didn’t matter how often I saw his body or expressions; it was never enough. I wanted more.

No one would ever take you from me. You’re mine, and whoever tries to take you will…

"Lily... Don’t look at me like that, or else. I’ll want to be mean to you." Fenris warned, breaking me from my train of thought.

For a moment, it stunned me. Those thoughts…

What was I…

He wouldn’t let me ponder for long, though. Before I knew it, he spun me around, lifting my waist.

I tried to reach for him but quickly retreated when he rubbed his heat on my thighs. It was also rubbing my vulva, concentrating on my sensitive bell—a surprised gasp released from my lips.

You’ve never done anything like this before.

This was an entirely new form of teasing, spreading my slits every time this wolf pushed into me, making the itch go deeper each time.

Is it because I wasn’t truthful earlier? Did you notice?

My worries flooded my mind as a chuckle released from his lips, continuing to thrust himself in between my thighs. Even though it felt good, I couldn’t help but want more.

"Stop..." I mumbled, trying to get my head around the negative thoughts.

However, even though I wasn’t referring to Fenris, he immediately ceased his movements.

"You want me to stop?" he asked, pulling back his hair from his face.

I slowly glanced towards him, wondering why he halted his movements. I never intended to worry him about me or make him think he did anything wrong. I only wanted to end the negative thoughts that weren’t his fault.

My attempts to cease them were useless, though. It seemed like I had given him the wrong idea, thanks to them, too. From his earlier expressions, I could notice the worry in his eyes.

"No... don’t stop," I whispered.

It triggered Fenris to tilt his head, “Uh, just tell me if you feel uncomfortable with anything, okay?”

“Okay,” I simpered.

A soft smile rose on his lips, sending my heart into a different type of storm.

Ah… I’ll give the world if I could read your thoughts for a second. Perhaps you aren’t doing this as punishment but to see the reaction I give. I might be overthinking everything, but when can’t I when it comes to you?

This time, when I reached for him with my hand, I met with his, intertwining them together. He chuckled momentarily, pulling me up towards him and into his lap.

My mind couldn’t keep up when I suddenly faced Fenris in his full splendor. The way his bare skin felt on mine made me feel skittish. All I could do was try to avoid his gaze, only for him to trail kisses down my neck and onto my chest.

However, I couldn’t help but arch my back when his fingers found their way into me again. I grabbed onto his shoulders, shivering when he licked my chest as his other hand trailed down my back and onto my bum.

My mind slowly became filled with him alone, yet…

"Fenris... I want you in me," I mumbled, unsatisfied by his fingers alone.

Oh, how greedy I’ve become.

The tone in my voice told him everything he needed to know.

“Okay, Lily, I’ll give you everything you want, plus more.” He tugged away from my nips, leaning into me before brushing his lips against mine.

Gripping onto my hips, he focused on the kiss before pressing his heat against my entrance. Feeling the tip slip into me triggered me to get jittery as I pushed my tongue into his mouth. A smirk formed on his lips before pulling me into him, allowing his length to meet my core.

The moment he filled me with himself, I was in bliss. I couldn’t help but whine loudly when he thrust deep into me, leaving no space between him and me, draping my arms around his neck before wrapping my legs around his hips.

Every time he made love to me, his tail swaddled around my waste. His movements were always gentle, even when it felt rougher than usual. It was nothing compared to what he could do if he wanted it to hurt.

This wolf showed me in so many ways how he cared that I couldn’t help but mewl loudly, feeling the full extent of the ecstasy that Fenris was providing me with. My body had become extra sensitive to his touch, responding to him alone.

Especially when I professed my feelings to him, the emotions flowing out of me were too complex to contain anymore. Before I knew it, I began to confess my love for him again before quieting by thrusting deeply into me and tugging me into another kiss.

I didn’t know if it was to stop me from telling him I loved him, but it was a tender kiss. Without separating from me, he pushed himself deeper within me to the extent that I embraced him with both my arms and legs tightly.

Even though this all started with me trying to hide that I went behind Fenris's back, it developed into something else. Even though it deprived me of rationalizing correctly, how he held me made me wonder what he and Ryker had spoken about.

Usually, my wolf would only take an hour or two whenever it was a meeting, but he was out until dusk.

Have you done something else I don’t know about? Will you tell me if I ask? Ah… I doubt it.

Unable to keep my head straight enough to figure anything out, I let myself fall into the pleasure Fenris gave me, who, much to his word, didn’t let me have a moment to catch myself. Not even when we were in the bathroom, he made love to me once again while we showered.

Not that I minded his attention; it wasn’t like I could try to handle my power with him around. He would be all over me when I took off my bracelet.

You’re too vigilant, so give me more of you! I can’t get enough!

This lovemaking continued throughout the night until Fenris suddenly plopped onto the bed, triggering me to think something was wrong, but I quickly realized he had fallen asleep.

This is the first time I’ve outlasted you.

The suddenness of it all had caught me by surprise, though the dark circles under his eyes told me all I needed to know.

You pushed yourself over your limit, all to satisfy me. Silly wolf…

Releasing a sigh, I covered Fenris's naked body with the blanket before lying next to him.

Ah… this happened once, back when we were kids.

We had started living together, and he was going through his intensive training, determined to get stronger.

How often have you told me you’re trying to get stronger for me? I lost count.

Thinking back, it had been fourteen years since we met, soon to be fifteen. I couldn’t help but smile when I thought about all my time with him. The kindness he filled me with was far longer than the time I was tortured. However, it also made me wonder about another life.

My wolf was such a sweet child back then. Perhaps you would’ve been happy with your family if I had never pursued you. Or so I wish we both knew Stella would’ve found a way to hurt Amir, using you.

Unable to help myself, I kissed him on his cheek, which he responded to by pulling me into his arms. I thought he had woken up, but he hadn’t. Instinctively, he was always protective of me. I couldn’t tell when the emotion inhibitor stopped working, but I was glad I could feel it once again.

Being denied of my emotions has made me docile and dependent on you. But that won’t happen anymore. No, this time, it’ll be my turn to protect those I care about, and it won’t be like the failure of all those years ago.

"I’m sorry I depended on you all these years. It must’ve been heavy to hold it all. I love you so much that it hurts, Fenris." I murmured, caressing his warm cheek.

Oh... How much I love you. There isn’t any stopping me anymore.

Every drop of reservation I had of what I was about to do melted.

I’ll protect you at all costs. Even if... it ends the world as we know it.